Bladeren bron

Text edits and grammar improvements.

Vengeance11 3 jaren geleden
bovenliggende
commit
67ddda7b04

+ 2 - 2
locations/AlbStars.qsrc

@@ -270,7 +270,7 @@ if $ARGS[0] = 'starlets':
 	elseif pcs_dancero < 30:
 		'You sometimes manage to get the moves right, but most of the time you are out of sync or make the wrong move. Albina constantly yells at you and calls you "a bowlegged cow."'
 	elseif pcs_dancero < 45:
-		'You manage to get into the general rhythm and move well with the other girls, but Albina is still not happy. "<<$pcs_nickname>>, you are very sluggish! You need to put more life into it!"'
+		'You manage to get into the general rhythm and move well with the other girls, but Albina is still not happy. "You''re too sluggish, <<$pcs_nickname>>! Put more life into it!"'
 	elseif pcs_dancero < 55:
 		'You perform the routine with no mistakes, but Albina still nags at you. "You''re not at a funeral, <<$pcs_nickname>>! Raise your head and smile!"'
 	else
@@ -1226,7 +1226,7 @@ if $ARGS[0] = 'parkrally':
 		gs 'stat'
 		'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/locations/pavlovsk/park/event/meeting/meeting3.jpg"></center>'
 
-		'You arrive at the park and gather behind the stage as Albina''s father gives an awkward speech to what is left of his supporters. He clears his throat and calls you up onto the stage as music starts playing. You reluctantly walk out onto the stage with the other girls, the crowd reacting to your skimpy clothing. The men whistle and holler while the women watch in disgust and whisper among themselves. '
+		'You arrive at the park and gather behind the stage as Albina''s father gives an awkward speech to what is left of his supporters. He clears his throat and calls you up onto the stage as music starts playing. You reluctantly walk out onto the stage with the other girls, the crowd reacting to your skimpy clothing. Some men whistle and holler and others avert their gaze while the women watch in disgust and whisper among themselves. '
 		'You and the girls start your routine, but the crowd''s reactions at your outfits makes you all feel very uncomfortable and you see Albina glaring at her father a few times. You finally finish the awkward performance and Albina motions for you all to return to the car as her father makes desperate pleas to the diminishing crowd.'
 		'You return to the community center locker room, where Albina practically rips her leotard off and storms off into the showers. You remove your own outfit and go for a shower yourself. '
 		if deodorant_on = 1: gs 'sweat', 'remove_deo' & '<br>Your deodorant gets washed away in the shower.'

+ 12 - 12
locations/albina_election_events.qsrc

@@ -6,15 +6,15 @@ AlbinaQW['RideDaystart'] = daystart + rand(2,5)
 
 gs 'stat'
 '<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/characters/pavlovsk/school/girl/albina/chernov.jpg"></center>'
-'A car pulls up next to you. A man wearing a nice suit steps out and introduces himself. "Captain Chernov, State Security Service." he says and pulls out his badge. "Why are you here? What did I do? Am I under arrest?" you ask in panicked surprise. He ignores you and continues.' 
-'"You are <<$pcs_firstname>> <<$pcs_lastname>>, correct? Let''s step aside and have a chat."'
+'A car suddenly pulls up next to you and a man wearing a nice suit and hat steps out and introduces himself. "Captain Chernov, State Security Service." he says and pulls out his badge. "Why are you here? What did I do? Am I under arrest?" you ask in panicked surprise. He ignores you and continues.' 
+'"You are <<$pcs_firstname>> <<$pcs_lastname>>, correct? Please come and sit in my car. We need to have a little chat."'
 act 'Speak with Chernov':
 	*clr & cla
 	menu_off = 1
 	minut += 1
 	gs 'stat'
 	'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/characters/pavlovsk/school/girl/albina/chernov.jpg"></center>'
-	'Chernov pulls you aside. Upon closer examination, you notice he is holstering a gun under his left armpit. "Miss <<$pcs_lastname>>, I know that you are a member of Barlovskaya''s entourage. I also know that this is just a front. Their criminal activities are about to be put on hold, with or without your collaboration."
+	'He opens the back door and motions for you to step inside. Upon closer examination, you notice he is holstering a gun under his left armpit and so decide to listen to him. You step inside and he closes the door before sitting in the front passenger seat. A second man sits silently behind the wheel. "Miss <<$pcs_lastname>>, I know that you are a member of Barlovskaya''s entourage. I also know that this is just a front. Their criminal activities are about to be put on hold, with or without your collaboration."
 	"Our little talk here is quite important. When this case starts getting coverage, the whole town will know about the Starlets'' secret. We''ll have to inform your parents and your school that you were an illegal prostitute for Barlovskaya. You can testify anonymously like the other girls and keep your name out of it if you wish."'
 
 	act 'Ask him what he means':
@@ -22,10 +22,10 @@ act 'Speak with Chernov':
 		minut += 1
 		gs 'stat'
         '<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/characters/pavlovsk/school/girl/albina/chernov.jpg"></center>'
-		if age < 18:'"Albina didn''t whore me out!" you protest and Chernov smiles. "I never said it was Albina, did I? All you have to do is give me your testimony stating that you are underage and were forced into an illegal prostitution ring. You don''t have to worry about Albina. We''ll keep her safe from any consequences of her actions."'
-		if age >= 18:'"Albina didn''t whore me out!" you protest and Chernov smiles. "I never said it was Albina, did I? All you have to do is give me your testimony stating that you were forced into an illegal prostitution ring. You don''t have to worry about Albina. We''ll keep her safe from any consequences of her actions."'
+		if age < 18:'"Albina didn''t whore me out!" you protest, Chernov just smiles. "I never said it was Albina, did I? All you have to do is give me your testimony stating that you are underage and were forced into an illegal prostitution ring. You don''t have to worry about Albina. We''ll keep her safe from any consequences of her actions."'
+		if age >= 18:'"Albina didn''t whore me out!" you protest, but Chernov just smiles. "I never said it was Albina, did I? All you have to do is give me your testimony stating that you were forced into an illegal prostitution ring. You don''t have to worry about Albina. We''ll keep her safe from any consequences of her actions."'
 
-		'He pauses and gives you time to think before continuing. "We already have enough evidence through an anonymous source and statements from your fellow dancers to take down these activities, but your testimony will help solidfy the prosecution. Your name will be kept from the media, of course."'
+		'He pauses and gives you time to think before continuing. "We already have enough evidence through an anonymous source and statements from your fellow dancers to take down these activities, but your testimony will help solidfy the prosecution. Your name will be kept secret, of course."'
 
 		if pcs_intel >= 70:
 			act 'Ask why the Security Service is involved':
@@ -33,7 +33,7 @@ act 'Speak with Chernov':
 				minut += 1
 				gs 'stat'
 				'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/characters/pavlovsk/school/girl/albina/chernov.jpg"></center>'
-				'"What is so important about Albina that the Security Service are involved?" you ask. Chernov raises a brow. "You''re a smart girl, huh? You know Boris Barlovskay, her father? He''s a retired police officer who served as the chief of police for years. In his retirement, we believe he has formed connections with the local criminal syndicate and is bribing his successor to block any investigations."'
+				'"What''s so important about Albina that the Security Service are involved?" you ask and Chernov raises a brow. "You''re a smart girl, huh? You know Boris Barlovskay, her father? He''s a retired police officer who served as the chief of police for years. In his retirement, we believe he has formed connections with the local criminal syndicate and is bribing his successor to block any investigations."'
                 '"Your friend is our way in. All we need to do is prove that Albina''s dance troupe is actually a front for illegal prostitution. We need your statement Miss <<$pcs_lastname>>."'
 				if pcs_intel >= 75:
 					act 'Ask about Albina''s involvement':
@@ -67,14 +67,14 @@ $din_zajava_albfather = {
 		AlbinaQW['Chernov'] = 1
 		gs 'stat'
 		'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/characters/pavlovsk/school/girl/albina/chernov.jpg"></center>'
-		'You agree to write a statement and Chernov nods. "You''re a smart girl. Come to the car, I have everything there to take down your statement."'
+		'You agree to write a statement and Chernov nods. "You''re a smart girl. Just write your statement here and sign it." he says as he hands you a pen and paper.'
 
 		act 'Go with Chernov':
 			*clr & cla
 			minut += 1
 			gs 'stat'
 			'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/characters/pavlovsk/school/girl/albina/chernov.jpg"></center>'
-			'You write your statement and he lets you go without a fuss. "You''ve really helped us here Miss <<$pcs_lastname>>. Thank you." He gets in the car and it drives away.'
+			'You write your statement and he lets you go without a fuss. "You''ve really helped us here Miss <<$pcs_lastname>>. Thank you." He motions for you to leave the car and it drives away as soon as you close the door.'
 
 			act 'Call Albina':
 				*clr & cla
@@ -100,7 +100,7 @@ $din_zajava_albfather_no = {
 		minut += 1
 		gs 'stat'
 		'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/characters/pavlovsk/school/girl/albina/chernov.jpg"></center>'
-		'You are reluctant to write a statement, but the captain keeps trying. "Look, I know you''re scared right now, but do you really not want to help stop this illegal exploitation of you and your friends? I promise you, nothing will happen to Albina."'
+		'You are reluctant to write a statement, but Chernov keeps trying. "Look, I know you''re scared right now, but do you really not want to help stop this illegal exploitation of you and your friends? I promise you, nothing will happen to Albina."'
 
 		if pcs_intel >= 80:
 			act 'Why should you give him information?':
@@ -108,7 +108,7 @@ $din_zajava_albfather_no = {
 				minut += 1
 				gs 'stat'
 				'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/characters/pavlovsk/school/girl/albina/chernov.jpg"></center>'
-				'"If you have everything you need, then why do you need my testimony?" you ask. He sighs. "To be honest, we don''t. Like I said, we got more than enough from the other girls, but a statement from you would still help us out and hopefully guarantee our success."'
+				'"If you already have everything you need, then why do you need my testimony?" you ask and he sighs. "To be honest, we don''t. Like I said, we got more than enough from the other girls, but a statement from you would still help us out and hopefully guarantee our success."'
 				'"What about Albina? Have you questioned her? I doubt she would act against her father." you ask. "We have other arrangements for her." is all he says in reply.'
 				dynamic $din_zajava_albfather
 				dynamic $din_zajava_albfather_no2
@@ -129,7 +129,7 @@ $din_zajava_albfather_no2 = {
 		AlbinaQW['Chernov'] = 2
 		gs 'stat'
 		'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/characters/pavlovsk/school/girl/albina/chernov.jpg"></center>'
-		'While a part of you wants to help, you don''t trust him and refuse to help. He sighs in resignation. "If that''s how it''s going to be, but just remember... you could have made that one bit of difference." He gets back in the car and it drives away.'
+		'While a part of you wants to help, you don''t trust him and refuse to help. He sighs in resignation. "If that''s how it''s going to be, but just remember... you could have made that one bit of difference." He motions for you to get out of the car and it drives away as soon as you close the door.'
 
 		act 'Call Albina':
 			*clr & cla

+ 18 - 15
locations/albinahome.qsrc

@@ -15,7 +15,7 @@ if $ARGS[0] = 'start':
 	if AlbinaQW['albride'] = 1:
 		AlbinaQW['albride'] = 2
 		'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/characters/pavlovsk/school/girl/albina/albinahome1.jpg"></center>'
-		'Albina leads you to the sitting room and disappears into the kitchen. While she is gone, her phone vibrates on the table. You look and see that "Mama" is trying to call her. "Strange. She''s never mentioned her mother. Hell, she barely talks about her father." you think to yourself.'
+		'Albina leads you to the rather well furnished and decorated sitting room. "You''ll have to excuse the mess. The maid was...loyal to my father, so she had to go." She then disappears into the kitchen. While she is gone, her phone vibrates on the table. You look and see that "Mama" is trying to call her. "Strange. She''s never mentioned her mother. Hell, she barely talks about her father." you think to yourself.'
 		'The phone rings out as Albina returns with a bottle of wine and two glasses. She places them on the table and notices her missed call. She frantically picks her phone up and types a message before stuffing it in her pocket, giving you a weak smile. "Don''t worry about who that was <<$pcs_firstname>>."'
 		act 'Drink':
 			*clr & cla
@@ -47,9 +47,9 @@ if $ARGS[0] = 'start':
 					'"<<$pcs_nickname>>, my father has abused me since my mother left when I was young. My father never wanted a child and made no effort to bond with me, but he''s an asshole and used his connections to stop my mother taking me away with her when she divorced him." she tearfully admits.'
 					'It was his fault she left him, but he blamed me and made sure I suffered for it with years of bullying and emotional abuse."'
 					*nl
-					'Now that he''s going down, she''s come back to look after me and help me deal with everything. She''s always checking up on me since she''s on edge about what my father can do, even in prison."'
+					'Now that he''s going down, she''s finally come back to look after me and help me deal with everything. She''s always checking up on me since she''s on edge about what my father can do, even in prison."'
 					'She continues. "The truth is his political campaign never took off. He loved abusing his position as a cop to bully others, especially me, but when he retired, he didn''t have that power anymore. A political career was his chance to get that back."'
-					'"Nobody was willing to back him however, and that''s when his abuse went beyond simply being emotional." She stops talking for a few seconds and you can clearly see her hands shaking. "That''s when... that''s when he decided to... whore me out to his friends. For ''a bit of fun'' with me, they would ''donate'' to his campaign fund.". She is on the verge of bursting into tears in front of you.'
+					'"Nobody was willing to back him however, and that''s when his abuse went beyond simply being emotional." She stops talking for a few seconds and you can clearly see her entire body shaking. "That''s when... that''s when he decided to... whore me out to his friends. For ''a bit of fun'' with me, they would ''donate'' to his campaign fund.". She is on the verge of bursting into tears in front of you.'
 
 					act 'Your father did what?':
 						*clr & cla
@@ -57,13 +57,15 @@ if $ARGS[0] = 'start':
 						gs 'stat'
 						'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/characters/pavlovsk/school/girl/albina/comfort.jpg"></center>'
 						'"Your own father sold your body to fund his election? That''s horrible!" you exclaim in shock.'
-						'Albina sits in silence before quietly nodding. "However, I wasn''t earning enough for him. That''s when he discovered my dance troupe and forced me to start selling my friends instead. I had to <<$pcs_nickname>>! I had to!" she tearfully exclaims.'
-						'"I was forced to let those fucking perverts do whatever they pleased with my friends <<$pcs_nickname>>! They were humiliated, abused and degraded for some fucking rubles! Rubles that the fucking bastard spent on his own whores that he mistreated instead of his campaign!"'
+						'She sits in silence before quietly nodding. "However, I wasn''t earning enough for him. That''s when he discovered my dance troupe and forced me to start selling my friends instead. I had to <<$pcs_nickname>>! I had to!" she tearfully exclaims.'
+						'"I was forced to let those fucking perverts do whatever they pleased with my friends <<$pcs_nickname>>! They were humiliated, abused and degraded for some fucking rubles! Rubles that the fucking bastard spent on his own whores that he mistreated instead of his campaign!' 
+						*nl
+						'The creep even hired the youngest and most attractive maid he could find just so he could fulfill his fantasy of having sex with one. The worst thing about it? She fucking enjoyed it and even encouraged him! I still have nightmares of when I was 9 and I stumbled into his room when they were having sex..." She shudders heavily before continuing. "I grew up having to listen to them fuck like rabbits, so the first thing Mama did when she got here was fire that disgusting fucking whore. I gave her an ''honest'' reference as a parting gift."'
                         !! if virgin or not
 						if pcs_vag = 0 and stat['vaginal'] = 0: 
-						'"That''s why I didn''t get you involved. Too many girls have to hide the fact that those bastards were their first time. I wasn''t going to let it happen again with you. But what he did to me..." Tears are streaming down her cheeks at this point.'
+						'"Anyway, that''s why I didn''t get you involved in any of this. Too many of my friends have to hide the fact that those bastards were their first time and I wasn''t going to let it happen again with you. What he did to me though..." Tears are streaming down her cheeks at this point.'
 						else 
-						'"Then you joined and my father forced me to put you to work as well. Of course, all those nasty creeps jumped at the chance to try out the ''new girl'' once they found out about you. But what he did to me..." Tears are streaming down her cheeks at this point.'
+						'"Anyway, when you joined the group, my father forced me to put you to work as well, despite my best efforts. Of course, all those nasty creeps jumped at the chance to try out the ''new girl'' once they found out about you. What he did to me though..." Tears are streaming down her cheeks at this point.'
 						end
 						
 						act 'What did he do?':
@@ -71,12 +73,13 @@ if $ARGS[0] = 'start':
 							minut += 15
 							gs 'stat'
 							'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/characters/pavlovsk/school/girl/albina/comfort.jpg"></center>'
-							'"What did he do?" you ask.'
+							'"What did he do?" you ask softly and place a hand on her shoulder.'
 							'"It was bad enough being forced to whore out my friends to abusive creeps who almost choked them to death, but... but..."'
-							'"But what?" you ask softly. She steels herself before answering you. "If I didn''t get the girl the guys wanted, my father said it was perfectly fine for them to take me and do what they wanted, even rape me." she cries.'
-							'"They would take their anger at not getting the girl they wanted out on me. I would be choked, slapped, even spat on! Some nights, I''d come home and he would berate me for not ''helping his donors'' and I would be subjected to his abuse as well. Other times, he would bring his friends home and let them have their way with me. One guy or four, he didn''t care what they done to me so long as they paid.' 
-							'"That fat and disgusting Armenian pervert visited often. One time, he choked me unconscious so he could cum inside me, and when I awoke and realised what he had done, I started panicking about getting pregnant. That''s when I heard my asshole father downstairs arguing with him about what effect a pregnant teenage daughter would have on his campaign. My wellbeing was of no concern to him, but luckily, I was on the pill for this sort of thing happening. It did spook him into making a strict rule to pull out though."'
-							'She turns and looks directly into your eyes, tears running down her cheeks. "So yeah, my father abused me while running an underage prostitution ring where me and my friends were subjected to abusive sexual exploitation... and I... I couldn''t do anything about it!" The words barely make it out of her mouth before she bursts into a flood of tears.'
+							'"But what?" you ask softly and she steels herself before answering. "If I didn''t get the girl the guys wanted, my father said it was perfectly fine for them to take me and do what they wanted, even rape me." she cries.'
+							'"Some would take their anger at not getting the girl they wanted out on me. I would be choked, slapped, even spat on! Some nights, I''d come home and he would berate me for not ''helping his donors'' and I would be subjected to his abuse as well. Other times, he would bring his friends home and let them have their way with me. One guy or four, he didn''t care what they done to me so long as they paid.' 
+							'"That fat and disgusting Armenian pervert visited often. One time, he choked me unconscious so he could cum inside me, and when I awoke and realised what he had done, I started panicking about getting pregnant. That''s when I heard my asshole father downstairs arguing with him about what effect a pregnant teenage daughter would have on his campaign! My wellbeing was of no concern to him, but luckily, I was on the pill for this sort of thing happening. It did spook him into making a strict rule to pull out if they weren''t using a condom though."'
+							*nl
+							'She turns and looks directly into your eyes, tears now running down her cheeks. "So yeah, my father abused me while running an underage prostitution ring where me and my friends were subjected to abusive sexual exploitation... and I... I couldn''t do anything about it!" The words barely make it out of her mouth before she bursts into a flood of tears.'
 
 							act 'Comfort her':
 								*clr & cla
@@ -84,7 +87,7 @@ if $ARGS[0] = 'start':
 								gs 'stat'
 								'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/characters/pavlovsk/school/girl/albina/kissingattempt.jpg"></center>'
 								'You cradle her head against your chest as she sobs away, her tears soaking into your top. "Hey, hey. But you did do something about it. He''s going to prison for what he done!" you reassure her while softly stroking her hair.'
-								'She sits up, her eyes puffy from crying and wipes away her tears. "Yeah, yeah you''re right <<$pcs_nickname>>. I just got tired of watching my friends suffer when they didn''t deserve any of this. So I exposed him as what he is. A vile fucking creep!"'
+								'She sits up, her eyes puffy from crying and wipes away her tears. "Yeah, yeah you''re right <<$pcs_nickname>>. I just got tired of watching my friends suffer when they didn''t deserve any of this. So I exposed him for what he is. A vile fucking sex creep!"'
 								'"I just wanted to live my life without fearing what my own father would do to me. For the longest time, I was just too fucking submissive. I done what I should have years ago. Got what I wanted, when I wanted." she says before looking intently into your eyes.'
 								'You smile at her and are about to reply when she suddenly leans in and tries to kiss you.'
 								gs 'willpower', 'cuni', 'resist', 'medium'
@@ -100,7 +103,7 @@ if $ARGS[0] = 'start':
 										'You pull away from her, not wanting to kiss her. "Sorry I just..."' 
 										'She jumps back from you, almost falling from the sofa. "Sorry <<$pcs_nickname>>, I don''t know what came over me! It''s just... I''ve suffered a lot at the hands of men, so I enjoy seeking... female comfort at times, if you know what I mean..." You don''t want to kiss her, but she clearly needs reassurance. You place her head on your shoulder and gently stroke her hair for the next few minutes.'
 										'She seems to appreciate this and sits up. "I should really get going." you say and Albina nods her head in understanding. "I''ll see you later, okay?" you reassure her.'
-										'She smiles at you. "Of course and... thank you <<$pcs_nickname>>. It was nice to just let this all out. I''m glad I can call you my friend." You smile at her and start leaving when she runs up and embraces you in a tight hug that''s entirely uncharacteristic of her before walking you to the door.'
+										'She smiles at you. "Of course and... thanks <<$pcs_nickname>>. It was nice to just let this all out. I''m glad I can call you my friend." You smile at her and start leaving when she runs up and embraces you in a tight hug that''s entirely uncharacteristic of her before walking you to the door.'
 
 										act 'Continue':gt 'pav_residential'
 									end
@@ -180,7 +183,7 @@ if $ARGS[0] = 'start':
 			gs 'stat'
 			'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/characters/pavlovsk/school/girl/albina/train.jpg"></center>'
 			'Albina is training in her room, doing some stretching exercises.'
-			'She is wearing a pair of skin tight yoga pants that show off her toned body quite well.'
+			'She''s wearing a pair of skin tight yoga pants that show off her toned body quite well.'
 			act 'Ask why she doesn''t train at the gym':
 				*clr & cla
 				AlbinaQW['SportHome']  = 1

+ 57 - 57
locations/anushapt.qsrc

@@ -53,7 +53,7 @@ if $ARGS[0] = 'home':
 		gs 'stat'
 		'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/locations/pavlovsk/resident/apartment/anushapt/valeria.jpg"></center>'
 		'You stand outside the Konstantinov household knocking on the door. It takes quite a while before someone actually does come to answer it. In the end, it turns out to be Anushka''s mother.'
-		'Her mother just stands there glaring at you for a while, "Well now, don''t just stand there. What do you want? Oh wait, let me guess you want to see Anushka? Well, the little slut isn''t here, and I don''t know when she''ll be back, so why don''t you just go bother someone else?" Before you can even get a word in, she slams the door in your face, and you hear all the locks click into place. You turn to leave because you don''t have any other option.'
+		'Her mother just stands there, glaring at you for a while. "Well now, don''t just stand there. What do you want? Oh wait, let me guess you want to see Anushka? Well, the little slut isn''t here, and I don''t know when she''ll be back, so why don''t you just go bother someone else?" Before you can even get a word in, she slams the door in your face, and you hear all the locks click into place. You turn to leave because you don''t have any other option.'
 		act 'Move away from the door':gt'pav_complex', 'start'
 	elseif (hour >= 15 and hour < 22) or (week > 5 and hour >= 8 and hour < 22):
 		*clr & cla
@@ -74,8 +74,8 @@ if $ARGS[0] = 'home':
 			act 'Ask how he knows that':
 				*clr & cla
 				'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/locations/pavlovsk/resident/apartment/anushapt/maksim.jpg"></center>'
-				'You smile a bit. "How do you know she is taking a shower?"'
-				'He blushes a little bit and sputters "I can hear the water."'
+				'You smile a little. "How do you know she''s taking a shower?"'
+				'He blushes a little and sputters "I can hear the water."'
 				act 'Leave': gt 'pav_complex','start'
 				act 'Enter': gt 'anushapt','hallway'
 				act 'Tease him':
@@ -92,8 +92,8 @@ if $ARGS[0] = 'home':
 			*clr & cla
 			AnushkaLoc = 2
 			'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/locations/pavlovsk/resident/apartment/anushapt/maksim.jpg"></center>'
-			'You stand outside the Konstantinov household and wait for Anushka to come open the door.'
-			'Maksim answers the door instead. He looks you over from head to toe, obviously trying to imagine you naked. "What?" he asks.'
+			'You stand outside the Konstantinov household and wait for Anushka to come open the door, but Maksim answers instead.'
+			'He looks you over from head to toe, obviously trying to imagine you naked. "What?" he asks.'
 			'You ignore his staring and ask "Is Anushka home?"'
 			'He hooks his thumb over his shoulder to point down the hall. "She''s in her room, likely getting stoned or masturbating to porn or something."'
 			'You ignore his comments and step around to enter the apartment. He closes the door and heads back to his room.'
@@ -103,8 +103,8 @@ if $ARGS[0] = 'home':
 			*clr & cla
 			AnushkaLoc = 1
 			'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/characters/shared/photos/big144.jpg"></center>'
-			'You stand outside the Konstantinov household and hope that Anushka will be the one to come open the door.'
-			'To your relief, Anushka opens the door smiling. "Hi <<$pcs_nickname>>. Come in."'
+			'You stand outside the Konstantinov household and hope that Anushka will be the one to open the door.'
+			'To your relief, she opens the door, smiling. "Hey <<$pcs_nickname>>. Come on in."'
 			act 'Leave': gt 'pav_complex','start'
 			act 'Enter': gt 'anushapt','hallway'
 		elseif nushdoor <= 12 and anushka_tv_day ! daystart:
@@ -113,31 +113,31 @@ if $ARGS[0] = 'home':
 			anushka_tv_day = daystart
 			'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/characters/shared/photos/big144.jpg"></center>'
 			'You stand outside the Konstantinov household and hope that Anushka will be the one to come open the door.'
-			'To your relief, Anushka opens the door smiling. "Hi <<$pcs_nickname>>. Come in, I was just watching some TV." As you go inside, she closes the door and heads for the living room where some action movie is playing on the TV. She practically falls down on the couch as she takes a seat.'
+			'To your relief, she opens the door, smiling. "Hey <<$pcs_nickname>>. Come in, I was just watching some TV." As you go inside, she closes the door and heads for the living room where some action movie is playing on the TV. She practically falls down on the couch as she takes a seat.'
 			act 'Take a seat next to her': gt 'anushapt','nushlivroom'
 		elseif nushdoor <= 13:
 			*clr & cla
 			AnushkaLoc = 2
 			'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/locations/pavlovsk/resident/apartment/anushapt/maksim.jpg"></center>'
-			'You stand outside the Konstantinov household and wait for Anushka to come open the door.'
-			'Maksim answers the door instead. He looks you over from head to toe, obviously trying to imagine you naked. "What?" he asks.'
+			'You stand outside the Konstantinov household and wait for Anushka to open the door, but Maksim answers instead.'
+			'He looks you over from head to toe, obviously trying to imagine you naked. "What?" he asks.'
 			'You ignore his staring and ask "Is Anushka home?"'
-			'With a smug look on his face, he hooks his thumb over his shoulder to point down the hall. "She''s in her room getting pounded like the slut she is by Rad."'
+			'With a smug look on his face, he hooks his thumb over his shoulder to point down the hall. "She''s in her room getting pounded like the slut she is by Radomir."'
 			act 'Leave': gt 'pav_complex','start'
 			act 'Enter':
 				*clr & cla
 				AnushkaLoc = 2
 				'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/characters/shared/photos/big154.jpg"></center>'
-				'You ignore his comment and step around to enter the apartment. Just then, you see Radomir walking up the hall towards the door. He''s buckling his belt back in place. He gives you a huge grin and a wink. "Hey <<$pcs_nickname>>, bad timing because you just missed out. Nush is in her room recovering from the ass fucking I just gave her."'
+				'You ignore his comment and step around to enter the apartment. Just then, you see Radomir walking up the hall towards the door, buckling his belt back in place. He gives you a huge grin and a wink. "Hey <<$pcs_nickname>>, bad timing because you just missed out. Nush is in her room recovering from the ass fucking I just gave her."'
 				'He then reaches over and ruffles Maksim''s hair with his hand. "Your sister has a real nice tight ass, or at least she did." With that, he walks past both of you and leaves the apartment.'
-				'Maksim gives you an <i>I told you so</i> look and sneers. "See?" He walks back to his room.'
+				'"See?" he sneers before walking back to his room.'
 				act 'Walk past him': gt 'anushapt','hallway'
 			end
 			act 'Go to her room':
 				*clr & cla
 				AnushkaLoc = 2
 				'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/locations/pavlovsk/resident/apartment/anushapt/anushroom/listen.jpg"></center>'
-				'As you reach Anushka''s bedroom door, you hear voices inside. One of them is Anushka, and the other is obviously a guy, probably Radomir if Maksim is to be believed. You can''t quite make out what they are saying, so you lean against the door to hear better. You hear the guy say "Turn around and let me see that fine ass of yours."'
+				'As you reach Anushka''s bedroom door, you hear voices inside. One of them is Anushka, and the other is obviously a guy, probably Radomir if Maksim is to be believed. You can''t quite make out what they''re saying, so you lean against the door to hear better. You hear the guy say "Turn around and let me see that fine ass of yours."'
 				act 'Leave them in peace and leave the apartment': gt 'pav_complex','start'
 				gs 'willpower', 'voyeur', 'self'
 				if will_cost <= pcs_willpwr:
@@ -158,8 +158,8 @@ if $ARGS[0] = 'home':
 			*clr & cla
 			AnushkaLoc = 2
 			'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/locations/pavlovsk/resident/apartment/anushapt/maksim.jpg"></center>'
-			'You stand outside the Konstantinov household and wait for Anushka to come open the door.'
-			'Maksim answers the door instead. He looks you over from head to toe, obviously trying to imagine you naked. "What?" he asks.'
+			'You stand outside the Konstantinov household and wait for Anushka to open the door, but Maksim answers the door instead.'
+			'He looks you over from head to toe, obviously trying to imagine you naked. "What?" he asks.'
 			'You ignore his staring and ask "Is Anushka home?"'
 			'With a smug look on his face, he hooks his thumb over his shoulder to point down the hall. "She''s in her room getting fucked by Val."'
 			act 'Leave': gt 'pav_complex','start'
@@ -167,18 +167,18 @@ if $ARGS[0] = 'home':
 				*clr & cla
 				AnushkaLoc = 2
 				'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/characters/shared/photos/big158.jpg"></center>'
-				'You ignore his comments and step around to enter the apartment. Just then, you see Valentin walking up the hall towards the door zipping his pants up. He gives you a huge grin and a wink. "Hey <<$pcs_nickname>>, what''s up?"'
+				'You ignore his comments and step around to enter the apartment. Just then, you see Valentin walking up the hall towards the door, zipping his pants up. He gives you a huge grin and a wink. "Hey <<$pcs_nickname>>, what''s up?"'
 				'You look at him and say "What were you two doing?"'
-				'He grins a bit. It''s the kind of grin guys get after getting laid. "Oh you know, just hanging out and having fun." He then turns to Maksim. "Are you going to come by later and help me work on my bike?"'
-				'Maksim responds to Valentin. "If my dad lets me, because he is on my ass about my homework." Val just nods to him. "Gotcha." He gives both of you a slight wave and walks out.'
-				'Maksim gives you an <i>I told you so</i> look and sneers. "See?" It''s all he says before he walks back to his room'
+				'He just grins a little. "Oh you know, just hanging out and having fun." He then turns to Maksim. "Are you going to come by later and help me work on my bike?"'
+				'Maksim responds to Valentin. "If my dad lets me. He''s on my ass about my homework." Val just nods at him. "Gotcha." He gives both of you a slight wave and walks out.'
+				'"See?" is all Maksim says before he walks back to his room.'
 				act 'Walk past him': gt 'anushapt','hallway'
 			end
 			act 'Go to her room':
 				*clr & cla
 				AnushkaLoc = 2
 				'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/locations/pavlovsk/resident/apartment/anushapt/anushroom/listen.jpg"></center>'
-				'As you reach Anushka''s bedroom door, you hear voices inside. One of them is Anushka, and the other is obviously a guy, probably Valentin if Maksim is to be believed. You can''t quite make out what they are saying. You lean against the door to hear better, and you hear the guy ask "You wanna fuck?"'
+				'As you reach Anushka''s bedroom door, you hear voices inside. One of them is Anushka, and the other is obviously a guy, probably Valentin if Maksim is to be believed. You can''t quite make out what they''re saying. You lean against the door to hear better, and you hear the guy ask "You wanna fuck?"'
 				act 'Leave them in peace and leave the apartment': gt 'pav_complex','start'
 				gs 'willpower', 'voyeur', 'self'
 				if will_cost <= pcs_willpwr:
@@ -199,8 +199,8 @@ if $ARGS[0] = 'home':
 			*clr & cla
 			AnushkaLoc = 2
 			'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/locations/pavlovsk/resident/apartment/anushapt/maksim.jpg"></center>'
-			'You stand outside the Konstantinov household and wait for Anushka to come open the door.'
-			'Maksim answers the door instead. He looks you over from head to toe, obviously trying to imagine you naked. "What?" he asks.'
+			'You stand outside the Konstantinov household and wait for Anushka to open the door, but Maksim asnwers instead.'
+			'He looks you over from head to toe, obviously trying to imagine you naked. "What?" he asks.'
 			'You ignore his staring to ask "Is Anushka home?"'
 			'He hooks his thumb over his shoulder to point down the hall. "She''s in her room taking some black guy''s dick up her ass." he says with disgust.'
 			act 'Leave': gt 'pav_complex','start'
@@ -208,8 +208,8 @@ if $ARGS[0] = 'home':
 				*clr & cla
 				AnushkaLoc = 2
 				'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/characters/shared/photos/big146.jpg"></center>'
-				'You ignore his comments and step around to enter the apartment. Just then, you see Marcus walking up the hall towards the door. He freezes in place, looking obviously embarrassed. He looks down to not meet your eyes. "Hey <<$pcs_nickname>>, I was just hanging out... anyways I need to get going... see you at school yeah?" Without waiting for a reply, he hurries out of the apartment.'
-				'Maksim gives him a disgusted look as he walks by, then looks to you with an <i>I told you so</i> look and sneers. "See?" It''s all he says before he walks back to his room'
+				'You ignore his comments and step around him to enter the apartment. Just then, you see Marcus walking up the hall towards the door. He freezes in place, looking very embarrassed. He looks down to avoid eye contact. "Hey <<$pcs_nickname>>, I was just hanging out... anyways I need to get going... see you at school, yeah?" Without waiting for a reply, he hurries out of the apartment.'
+				'Maksim gives him a disgusted look as he walks by, then looks at you. "See?" he sneers before he walks back to his room.'
 				
 				act 'Walk past him': gt 'anushapt','hallway'
 			end
@@ -217,7 +217,7 @@ if $ARGS[0] = 'home':
 				*clr & cla
 				AnushkaLoc = 2
 				'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/locations/pavlovsk/resident/apartment/anushapt/anushroom/listen.jpg"></center>'
-				'As you reach Anushka''s bedroom door, you hear voices inside. One of them is Anushka, and the other is obviously a guy. You can''t quite make out what they are saying. You lean against the door to hear better, and you hear the guy say "God, you''re so beautiful."'
+				'As you reach Anushka''s bedroom door, you hear voices inside. One of them is Anushka, and the other is obviously a guy. You can''t quite make out what they''re saying. You lean against the door to hear better, and you hear the guy say "God, you''re so beautiful."'
 				act 'Leave them in peace and leave the apartment': gt 'pav_complex','start'
 				gs 'willpower', 'voyeur', 'self'
 				if will_cost <= pcs_willpwr:
@@ -240,25 +240,25 @@ if $ARGS[0] = 'home':
 				*clr & cla
 				maksimQW = 1
 				'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/locations/pavlovsk/resident/apartment/anushapt/maksim.jpg"></center>'
-				'You stand outside the Konstantinov household and wait for Anushka to come open the door.'
-				'Maksim answers the door instead. He looks you over from head to toe, obviously trying to imagine you naked. "What?" he asks.'
+				'You stand outside the Konstantinov household and wait for Anushka to open the door, but Maksim answers instead.'
+				'He looks you over from head to toe, obviously trying to imagine you naked. "What?" he asks.'
 				'You ignore his staring and ask, "Is Anushka home?"'
-				'"No, she''s not home right now. She''s probably out sucking some guy''s dick or something, but if you want, you can go wait for her in her room."' 
+				'"No, she''s not here right now. She''s probably out sucking some guy''s dick or something, but you can go wait for her in her room if you want."' 
 				act 'Leave': gt 'pav_complex','start'
 				act 'Enter': gt 'anushapt','hallway'
 				act 'Why would you say that?':
 					*clr & cla
 					'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/locations/pavlovsk/resident/apartment/anushapt/maksim.jpg"></center>'
 					'You are aghast that her brother would say such a thing about her. "Why would you tell people something like that?"'
-					'At first, he looks a bit confused, as if he''s not sure what you mean, then just shrugs. "That''s what my mother always says when I ask where Anushka is."'
+					'At first, he looks a little confused, as if he''s not sure what you mean, then just shrugs. "That''s what my mother always says when I ask where Anushka is."'
 					'You shake your head, unsure what to think about this. Should you go in and wait for her or just go? Maksim just stands there staring at your tits, and you can actually feel him undressing you with his eyes.'
 					act 'Leave': gt 'pav_complex','start'
 					act 'Enter': gt 'anushapt','hallway' 
 				end
 			else
 				'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/locations/pavlovsk/resident/apartment/anushapt/maksim.jpg"></center>'
-				'Maksim answers the door instead. He looks you over from head to toe, obviously trying to imagine you naked. "Anushka''s not home right now. She''s probably out sucking some guy''s dick or something, but if you want you can go wait for her in her room."'
-				'You shake your head a bit, but there is nothing you can do about it. Should you go in and wait for her or just go? As you decide, you can feel Maksim undressing you with his eyes while staring straight at your tits.'
+				'Maksim answers the door instead. He looks you over from head to toe, obviously trying to imagine you naked. "Anushka''s not here right now. She''s probably out sucking some guy''s dick or something, but you can wait for her in her room if you want."'
+				'You shake your head, but there is nothing you can do about it. Should you go in and wait for her or just go? As you decide, you can feel Maksim undressing you with his eyes as he stares straight at your tits.'
 			end 
 			act 'Leave': gt 'pav_complex','start'
 			act 'Enter': gt 'anushapt','hallway'
@@ -285,12 +285,12 @@ if $ARGS[0] = 'hallway':
 	'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/locations/pavlovsk/resident/apartment/anushapt/hall.jpg"></center>'
 	if anushkaFirstvisit < 2:
 		anushkaFirstvisit = 2
-		'As you enter the Konstantinov''s hallway, you notice there is something that''s not quite right... the place is somewhat depressing to be in. The whole apartment feels strange and foreign. You don''t get the loving, homey feeling that your mother strives to keep at home. All the doors are closed, but from one you can hear the noise of a TV and from another you can hear someone yelling.'
+		'As you enter the Konstantinov''s hallway, you notice there is something that''s not quite right... the place is somewhat depressing to be in. The whole apartment feels strange and foreign and you don''t get the loving, homey feeling that your mother strives to keep at home. All the doors are closed, but you can hear the noise of a TV blaring from one and can hear someone yelling in another.'
 	else
-		'This is the entrance hall of Anushka''s apartment. It''s devoid of any furniture, with shoes and some toys pushed against one wall leaving just enough room for a person to walk through. On the surface, things seem fine, but you can feel that there is something very off about this place. You''re not exactly sure what it is, though. From here, you can reach all the other rooms in the house.'
+		'This is the entrance hall of Anushka''s apartment. It''s devoid of any furniture, but has shoes and some toys pushed against one wall, leaving just enough room for a person to walk through. On the surface, things seem fine, but you can feel that there is something very off about this place. You''re not exactly sure what it is, though. From here, you can reach all the other rooms in the house.'
 	end
 	if rand(0,9) = 0 and AnushkaLoc ! 1:
-		'As you walk through the dark hallway, you suddenly get the feeling that you''re being watched. You turn around quickly, but you can''t see anyone there.'
+		'As you walk through the dark hallway, you suddenly get the feeling that you''re being watched. You quickly turn around, but you can''t see anyone.'
 		'"Is anyone there?" you ask. You were hoping for a response, so once again you call out. "I know you''re there, come on out!"'
 		'You stand still for a little while longer, listening for something, but nothing happens. After a while, you decide to move on, but you''re pretty sure that it was just Anushka''s younger brother, Maksim, spying on you.'
 	end
@@ -368,7 +368,7 @@ if $ARGS[0] = 'bathroom':
 				*clr & cla
 				'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/locations/pavlovsk/resident/apartment/anushapt/showergetout.jpg"></center>'
 				'You pull the shower curtain tight against your body to make sure there is nothing for him to see other than your head. "Get out of here you little pervert!"'
-				'He laughs then quickly ducks away before you hear Anushka yelling at him. "What the hell were you doing?" As you continue your shower, you hear a lot more yelling from behind the door, and there is even a loud crash. Suddenly, silence descends upon the apartment.'
+				'He laughs, then quickly ducks away before you hear Anushka yelling at him. "What the hell are you doing?" As you continue your shower, you hear a lot more yelling from behind the door, and there is even a loud crash. Suddenly, silence descends upon the apartment.'
 				act 'Get out of the shower': gt 'anushapt','bathroom'
 			end
 			if pcs_inhib >= 50:
@@ -413,8 +413,8 @@ if $ARGS[0] = 'nushshower':
 	AnushkaLoc = 7
 	'<center><h4><font color="maroon">Bathroom</font></h4></center>'
 	'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/locations/pavlovsk/resident/apartment/anushapt/bathroom/dry1.jpg"></center>'
-	'As you approach the bathroom, you hear the water running. Checking the latch, you find it still broken and push the door open. As you walk in, the water turns off. You look around and see that the bathroom has seen better days, with mold growing in the corners of the walls and floors. The place probably hasn''t been cleaned for quite some time.' 
-	'The toilet sits along the far wall. There''s also a bathtub with an old plastic shower curtain hanging from a rod above it. Anushka peeks out from around the curtain. When she see''s it''s you, she pushes it aside and grabs a towel. "Oh hey <<$pcs_nickname>>, what''s up?"'
+	'As you approach the bathroom, you hear the water running. Checking the latch, you find it is still broken and push the door open. As you walk in, the water turns off. You look around and see that the bathroom has seen better days, with mold growing in the corners of the walls and floors. The place probably hasn''t been cleaned for quite some time.' 
+	'The toilet sits along the far wall. There''s also a bathtub with an old plastic shower curtain hanging from a rod above it. Anushka peeks out from around the curtain. When she sees that it''s you, she pushes it aside and grabs a towel. "Oh hey <<$pcs_nickname>>, what''s up?"'
 	gs 'arousal', 'voyeur', 2
 	act 'Just came over to hangout':
 		*clr & cla
@@ -422,7 +422,7 @@ if $ARGS[0] = 'nushshower':
 		gs 'stat'
 		'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/locations/pavlovsk/resident/apartment/anushapt/bathroom/dry2.jpg"></center>'
 		'"Just came over to see what you were up to." you reply.'
-		'She nods a bit as she keeps drying off and seems not to care in the least that you are in there with her. "I was debating if I wanted to do something tonight myself."'
+		'She nods as she dries off, seemingly not caring that you are in here with her. "I was debating if I wanted to do something tonight myself."'
 		'"Well, now we can do something together." you tell her.'
 		'"Sure, sounds good to me. What do you want to do?"'
 		act 'We can think of something':
@@ -430,7 +430,7 @@ if $ARGS[0] = 'nushshower':
 			minut += 1
 			gs 'stat'
 			'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/locations/pavlovsk/resident/apartment/anushapt/bathroom/dry3.jpg"></center>'
-			'You think about it for a moment. "I don''t know, but I am sure we can come up with something to do."'
+			'You think about it for a moment. "I don''t know, but I''m sure we can come up with something to do."'
 			'"Sounds good, so give me a few minutes to get dried off, and I will join you in my room." she tells you.'
 			act 'Go wait for her': showerphotos = 0 & gt 'anushapt', 'shower_wait'
 			act 'Take her picture with your phone':
@@ -439,11 +439,11 @@ if $ARGS[0] = 'nushshower':
 				anushkaphoto[1] = 1
 				gs 'stat'
 				'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/pc/pictures/anushka/1.jpg"></center>'
-				'While she is drying off, you pull out your smartphone. You hold it up to get a good image of her drying off and take her picture.'
-				'She notices you taking her picture and pulls the towel in place. "Hey you little perv."'
+				'While she is drying off, you pull out your phone. You hold it up to get a good image of her drying off and take her picture.'
+				'She notices you taking her picture and pulls the towel in place. "Hey, you little perv!"'
 				*nl
-				'You giggle at her reaction. "Oh please... like you don''t like showing your body off all the time."'
-				'"Yes, when I want to. Now go on, get out of here!" she says while making a shooing motion with one of her hands.'
+				'You giggle at her reaction. "Oh please! Like you don''t like showing your body off <i>all</i> the time."'
+				'"Yes, when I want to. Now go on and get out of here!" she says while making a shooing motion with one of her hands.'
 				'You know deep down she really doesn''t care. She loves showing off her body too much, but maybe you should give her some privacy.'
 				act 'Go wait for her': gt 'anushapt', 'shower_wait'
 				gs 'willpower', 'exhib', 'force'
@@ -471,7 +471,7 @@ if $ARGS[0] = 'nushshower':
 							act 'More':
 								*clr & cla
 								'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/pc/pictures/anushka/4.jpg"></center>'
-								'She giggles a bit and turns her side to you. The towel is slowly opened to tease you a bit with her nudity while striking a sexy pose.'
+								'She giggles a bit and turns her side to you. She slowly opens her towel to tease you while striking a sexy pose.'
 								'"Yeah, that''s it. Give me a little more. Let''s see that hot little body of yours!"'
 								gs 'arousal', 'erotic_nudity', 2
 								gs 'stat'
@@ -526,9 +526,9 @@ if $ARGS[0] = 'shower_wait':
 	'<center><h4><font color="maroon">Anushka''s Room</font></h4></center>'
 	'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/locations/pavlovsk/resident/apartment/anushapt/anushroom/nushbed.jpg"></center>'
 	if showerphotos = 0:
-		'While Anushka dries off, you go into her room to wait for her. The room is surprisingly clean, except for a little dust here and there. Her walls are covered with pictures and posters while the rest of the room is skillfully decorated with various strings of coloured lights. You take a seat on her bed as you wait for her to come join you. A couple of minutes later, she walks in completely naked and quickly gets dressed before jumping on the bed next to you.'
+		'While Anushka dries off, you go into her room to wait for her. The room is surprisingly clean, except for a little dust here and there. Her walls are covered with pictures and posters while the rest of the room is skillfully decorated with various strings of coloured lights. You take a seat on her bed as you wait for her to join you. A few minutes later, she walks in completely naked and quickly gets dressed before jumping on the bed next to you.'
 	elseif showerphotos = 1:
-		'Having messed around a bit taking her picture while she dried off, you decide to give her some privacy and go wait in her room. The room is surprisingly clean, even if it''s somewhat dusty. The walls are covered with pictures and posters, and the room is skillfully decorated with various strings of coloured lights. You take a seat on the bed as you wait for her to come join you. A couple of minutes later, she walks in completely naked and quickly gets dressed before jumping on the bed next to you.'
+		'Having messed around a bit taking her picture while she dried off, you decide to give her some privacy and go wait in her room. The room is surprisingly clean, even if it''s somewhat dusty. The walls are covered with pictures and posters, and the room is skillfully decorated with various strings of coloured lights. You take a seat on the bed as you wait for her to come join you. A few minutes later, she walks in completely naked and quickly gets dressed before jumping on the bed next to you.'
 	elseif showerphotos = 2:
 		'With the impromptu photo shoot and selfies done, the two of you head to her room, Anushka still completely naked. Once inside, she quickly gets dressed while you take a seat on her bed. Once she is fully dressed, she flops down on the bed next to you.'
 	end
@@ -595,7 +595,7 @@ if $ARGS[0] = 'nushcloset':
 				pcs_mood += 10
 				minut += 10
 				'"Wow, you have so many outfits. Can I try some on?" you ask her.'
-				'Anushka smiles and nods. "Sure... let''s do it." She gets up to join you at the closet and starts pulling out different outfits. She picks the ones that she apparently thinks will work best for you. Her clothes don''t fit perfectly, but they fit well enough, and they do look good on you. As you check yourself out in the mirror on the door, she says "Looking nice, <<$pcs_nickname>>.'
+				'Anushka smiles and nods. "Sure, let''s do it." She gets up to join you at the closet and starts pulling out different outfits. She picks the ones that she apparently thinks will work best for you. Her clothes don''t fit perfectly, but they fit well enough, and they do look good on you. As you check yourself out in the mirror on the door, she says "Looking nice, <<$pcs_nickname>>.'
 				act 'Try on more clothes':
 					*clr & cla
 					minut += 10
@@ -620,7 +620,7 @@ if $ARGS[0] = 'nushcloset':
 							minut += 10
 							gs 'stat'
 							'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/locations/pavlovsk/resident/apartment/anushapt/anushroom/maksimspy4.jpg"></center>'
-							'Anushka suddenly yells "Oh my god you little pervert!" and covers herself quickly. You turn to see Maksim peeking in through the door and instinctively cover yourself also. Anushka then grabs a shoe and throws it at the door. Maksim takes off running just before it hits.'
+							'Anushka suddenly yells "Oh my god, you little pervert!" and covers herself quickly. You turn to see Maksim peeking in through the door and instinctively cover yourself as well. Anushka then grabs a shoe and throws it at the door. Maksim takes off running just before it hits.'
 							'Anushka takes off after him and runs out of her room stark naked. You grab the loose dress you had just been wearing and throw it on quickly before chasing after them.'
 							act 'Chase':
 								*clr & cla
@@ -629,10 +629,10 @@ if $ARGS[0] = 'nushcloset':
 								'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/locations/pavlovsk/resident/apartment/anushapt/anushroom/maksimspy5.jpg"></center>'
 								'You can hear Maksim yelling as he runs away. "Help! She''s going to kill me!"'
 								'You come out into the hallway just in time to see Maksim run into the living room, closely followed by a naked Anushka. "Come back here you little pervert!" she screams loudly.'
-								'Just as they both disappear into the living room, you hear Eduard''s voice. "What the hell is going on?" You arrive just in time. You see Maksim in the corner with his dad staring at him while Anushka is standing just behind her dad completely naked.'
+								'Just as they both disappear into the living room, you hear Eduard''s voice. "What the hell is going on?" You arrive just in time to see Maksim cowering in the corner with his dad staring at him while Anushka is standing just behind her dad, completely naked.'
 								'"She''s trying to kill me!" a panicking Maksim says in reply.'
-								'He then turns towards his daughter and starts to say "Just what the hel..." but he never finishes that sentence. Instead, he immediately turns his head away and puts his hand in front of his eyes. "God dammit Anushka, put some clothes on!" he bellows.'
-								act 'Put on some clothes Nush':
+								'Eduard turns to Anushka and starts to say "Just what the hel..." but he never finishes his sentence. Instead, he immediately turns his head away and puts his hand in front of his eyes. "God dammit Anushka, put some clothes on!" he bellows.'
+								act 'Put on some clothes':
 									*clr & cla
 									minut += 10
 									gs 'stat'
@@ -641,11 +641,11 @@ if $ARGS[0] = 'nushcloset':
 									'Maksim squeaks a lie out. "No."'
 									'Anushka starts to say something, then Eduard turns towards you. "Was he spying on you girls?"'
 									'You nod your head. "Yes, we were trying on clothes and we noticed him spying on us."'
-									'Ed visibly shakes with what you think is anger and embarrassment. "I am sorry <<$pcs_firstname>>. I thought I taught these boys better than this."'
+									'Eduard visibly shakes with what you think is anger and embarrassment. "I am sorry <<$pcs_firstname>>. I thought I taught these boys better than this."'
 									'Anushka chimes in. "See? I told you!"'
 									*nl
-									'He turns towards her and instantly regrets it as his daughter is still standing there completely naked. "God dammit Anushka, go to your room and put some clothes on!"'
-									'He turns back towards Maksim. "Come on boy, we are going to go for a walk." Maksim visibly swallows and looks scared. He doesn''t move at first until his dad stops and glares at him. He quickly catches up to his dad, and they walk out of the apartment together.'
+									'He turns towards her and instantly regrets it as she is still standing there completely naked. "God dammit Anushka, go to your room and put some clothes on for crying out loud!"'
+									'He turns back towards Maksim. "Come on boy, we are going for a walk." Maksim visibly swallows and looks scared. He doesn''t move at first until his dad stops and glares at him. He then quickly catches up, and they walk out of the apartment together.'
 									'Anushka turns and heads back to her room. "Fucking little pervert. I''m sorry that you had to deal with that <<$pcs_nickname>>."'
 									'You follow her back to her room, and you both get dressed again. "It''s not your fault. Boys will be boys."'
 									act 'Get dressed':gt 'anushapt','anushroom'
@@ -696,7 +696,7 @@ if $ARGS[0] = 'night_stand':
 		npc_rel['A144'] += 1
 		gs 'stat'
 		'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/locations/pavlovsk/resident/apartment/anushapt/anushroom/snoop.jpg"></center>'
-		'You decide to snoop, so you open the night stand''s drawer to peek inside. There are a variety of medicines, some that are legal and some, like pot, that aren''t.  You also notice a pair of scissors, razor blades, rolling papers, a lighter, a pack of cigarettes, condoms, lotion, lube, a vibrator, a dildo, a butt plug, and even a strap-on harness.'
+		'You decide to snoop, so you open the night stand''s drawer to peek inside. There are a variety of medicines, some that are legal and some, like pot, that aren''t.  You also notice a pair of scissors, razor blades, rolling papers, a lighter, a pack of cigarettes, condoms, lotion, lube, a vibrator, a dildo, a butt plug and even a strap-on harness.'
 		'"See anything you like?" Anushka asks you in a teasing tone.'
 		act 'Uh no':
 			*clr & cla
@@ -711,7 +711,7 @@ if $ARGS[0] = 'night_stand':
 		minut += 2
 		gs 'stat'
 		'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/locations/pavlovsk/resident/apartment/anushapt/anushroom/nushdrawer.jpg"></center>'
-		'You decide to snoop, so you open the night stand''s drawer to peek inside. There are a variety of medicines, some that are legal and some, like pot that aren''t. You also notice a pair of scissors, razor blades, rolling papers, a lighter, a pack of cigarettes, condoms, lotion, lube, a vibrator, a dildo, a butt plug, and even a strap-on harness.'
+		'You decide to snoop, so you open the night stand''s drawer to peek inside. There are a variety of medicines, some that are legal and some, like pot that aren''t. You also notice a pair of scissors, razor blades, rolling papers, a lighter, a pack of cigarettes, condoms, lotion, lube, a vibrator, a dildo, a butt plug and even a strap-on harness.'
 		'You''re not really surprised by the amount of sex toys Anushka has considering her relaxed attitude towards sex and sexuality. However, you decide it would be rude of you to play with them without her permission, so you close the drawer.'
 		act 'Close the drawer':gt 'anushapt','anushroom'
 	end

File diff suppressed because it is too large
+ 217 - 218
locations/anushkaev1.qsrc


+ 1 - 1
locations/pav_complexold.qsrc

@@ -9,7 +9,7 @@ if $ARGS[0] = 'etaj_1':
 	gs 'stat'
 	'<center><h3>old apartment building</h3></center>'
 	'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/locations/pavlovsk/resident/sharedapt/apthallway.jpg"></center>'
-	'An old apartment house that hasn''t been maintained for years.'
+	'An old apartment complex that hasn''t seen any kind of maintenance for years.'
 	'The entry doors are left unlocked and even if they weren''t, they look like they''ll fall apart at any moment.'
 	
 	'Inside is a board with <a href="exec:gt ''pav_complexold'', ''advert''">announcements</a> for the tenants.'

+ 3 - 3
locations/pav_residential.qsrc

@@ -88,7 +88,7 @@ end
 
 if AlbinaQW['AlbFatherQW']  >= 1 and AlbinaQW['ParkRally'] > 0:
 	if AlbinaQW['ElectionCampaignTime'] = 0:AlbinaQW['ElectionCampaignTime'] = totminut + 2880
-	'<br>You can see election posters on the walls all over town. They say: "Vote for Boris Barlovsky!" Wait a minute... isn''t that Albina''s father?</br>'
+	'<br>You see election posters plastered on walls and trees all over town. They say: "Vote for Boris Barlovsky!" Wait a minute... isn''t that Albina''s father?</br>'
 end
 
 if AlbinaQW['ElectionCampaignTime'] > 0 and AlbinaQW['ElectionCampaignTime'] <= totminut and hour >= 14 and AlbinaQW['AlbFatherQW']  = 1:gt 'albina_election_events'
@@ -126,14 +126,14 @@ if Enable_tablemap = 0:
 	if IgorLoverQW > 0 and IdorBlock = 0:'<a href="exec:minut += 10 & gt ''IgorHome'', ''home''">Igor Kruglov</a>, one of your classmates, lives in one of the fancier houses in town.'
 	if katjaFirstKiss >= 1 or mey_vika['mey_vika_qw'] >= 27 or mey_vika['key'] = 1: 'Nearby is a large house where the <a href="exec:minut += 10 & gt''mey_home'', ''door''">Meynold twins</a> live.'
 	if LariskaQW['story'] >= 5: '<a href="exec:minut += 10 & gt ''LariskaHome'', ''front_door''">Lariska Gruzdev</a>, one of your classmates, lives about 10 minutes away from your parents.'
-	if AlbinaQW['KnowsHouse'] > 0 or AlbinaQW['StarletsShutDown'] = 1:'<a href="exec:minut += 10 & gt ''albinaporog''">Albina Barlovskaya</a>, one of your classmates, lives in one of the few luxurious mansions Pavlovsk has to offer.'
+	if AlbinaQW['KnowsHouse'] = 1:'<a href="exec:minut += 10 & gt ''albinaporog''">Albina Barlovskaya</a>, one of your classmates, lives in one of the few luxurious mansions Pavlovsk has to offer.'
 else
 	st_count=0 & $show_table=''
 	if DimaBeHomeOnce = 1 and DimaRudeBlock = 0:gs'show_table','Fancier house of <a href="exec:minut += 10 & gt ''dimaHome'', ''home''">Dimka Nosov</a>','3'
 	if IgorLoverQW > 0 and IdorBlock = 0:gs'show_table','Fancier house of <a href="exec:minut += 10 & gt ''IgorHome'', ''home''">Igor Kruglov</a>', '3'
 	if katjaFirstKiss >= 1 or mey_vika['mey_vika_qw'] >= 27 or mey_vika['key'] = 1: gs'show_table','The house of the <a href="exec:minut += 10 & gt''mey_home'', ''door''">Meynold twins</a>','3'
 	if LariskaQW['story'] >= 5:gs'show_table','House of <a href="exec:minut += 10 & gt ''LariskaHome'', ''front_door''" >Lariska Gruzdev</a> in the richer part of town','3'
-	if AlbinaQW['KnowsHouse'] > 0 or AlbinaQW['StarletsShutDown'] = 1:gs'show_table','A luxurious mansion that''s home to <a href="exec:minut += 10 & gt ''albinaporog''">Albina Barlovskaya</a>','3'
+	if AlbinaQW['KnowsHouse'] = 1:gs'show_table','A luxurious mansion that''s home to <a href="exec:minut += 10 & gt ''albinaporog''">Albina Barlovskaya</a>','3'
 	if st_count > 0 :'<TABLE BORDER=1><<$show_table>></TR></TABLE>'
 end
 !!end of code changes.

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