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More minor stuff. So minor you can ignore it.

Vengeance11 3 years ago
parent
commit
d074244f51
4 changed files with 33 additions and 33 deletions
  1. 25 25
      locations/AlbStars.qsrc
  2. 3 3
      locations/albinahome.qsrc
  3. 4 4
      locations/danceGev.qsrc
  4. 1 1
      locations/preSYS.qsrc

+ 25 - 25
locations/AlbStars.qsrc

@@ -21,10 +21,10 @@ if $ARGS[0] = 'albina1':
 		gs 'stat'
 		'<center><b><font color="maroon"><<$npc_firstname[''A23'']>> <<$npc_lastname[''A23'']>></font></b></center>'
 		'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/characters/shared/photos/big23.jpg"></center>'
-		'You approach and greet Albina. She raises an eyebrow haughtily.'
-		'"And you are? Oh, right. <<$pcs_nickname>>. You''ve taken up dancing, have you?" You nod, confirming the obvious, but Albina just laughs dismissively. "Well, how''s that going for you?"'
+		'You approach and greet Albina. She raises an eyebrow in scornful confusion.'
+		'"And you are? Oh, right. <<$pcs_firstname>>. So you''ve taken up dancing, have you?" You nod, confirming the obvious, but Albina just laughs dismissively. "Well, how''s that going for you?"'
 		'"Not bad." you answer coldly. "Not bad at all."'
-		'Albina stares at you arrogantly. "Not bad? Well maybe in comparison with the local bowlegged cows, but I doubt that you can dance on a professional level."'
+		'Albina stares at you arrogantly. "Not bad? Well maybe in comparison with these bowlegged cows, but I doubt that you can dance on a professional level."'
 
 		act 'I don''t care':
 			*clr & cla
@@ -69,8 +69,8 @@ if $ARGS[0] = 'albina2':
 		gs 'stat'
 		'<center><b><font color="maroon"><<$npc_firstname[''A23'']>> <<$npc_lastname[''A23'']>></font></b></center>'
 		'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/characters/shared/photos/big23.jpg"></center>'
-		'You approach and greet Albina. She turns to you and smiles.'
-		'"Oh hello <<$pcs_nickname>>. I didn''t know you started dancing. Are you any good?" Albina asks with interest.'
+		'You approach and greet Albina, who turns to you and smiles.'
+		'"Oh hello <<$pcs_nickname>>. I didn''t know you started dancing. Are you any good?" she asks with interest.'
 		'"I''m pretty good, I think." you reply with a smile. "Even if I do say so myself."'
 		'"Pretty good, huh?" Albina responds in a condescending tone. "Well, I''ve seen some of the dancers that take lessons here. It wouldn''t take much to be better than those bow-legged cows. I doubt you''re up to any kind of professional standard though."'
 
@@ -110,17 +110,17 @@ if $ARGS[0] = 'albina3':
 	gs 'stat'
 	'<center><b><font color="maroon"><<$npc_firstname[''A23'']>> <<$npc_lastname[''A23'']>></font></b></center>'
 	'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/characters/shared/photos/big23.jpg"></center>'
-	'At the end of the class, a few girls enter the dance studio, including Albina Barlovskaya. You know Albina from school and you have a very close relationship from your mutual love for dancing.'
+	'At the end of the class, a few girls enter the dance studio, including Albina Barlovskaya. You''ve known Albina for years, having spent your childhood training with each other and have formed a close friendship over your shared passion for dancing.'
 
 	act 'Greet Albina':
 		*clr & cla
 		gs 'stat'
 		'<center><b><font color="maroon"><<$npc_firstname[''A23'']>> <<$npc_lastname[''A23'']>></font></b></center>'
 		'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/characters/shared/photos/big23.jpg"></center>'
-		'You approach and greet Albina. She turns to you and smiles.'
-		'"Oh hey <<$pcs_nickname>>! Please tell me you don''t practice with those bow-legged cows who call themselves dancers?" she asks with a smirk.'
-		'"I''m pretty good, but I don''t know if I''m on your level." you reply.'
-		'"Hey, don''t sell yourself short <<$pcs_nickname>>." Albina responds with a smile. "I''ve seen some of the people that take lessons here. I know you can dance far better than any of those wannabes, which brings me to my next question."'
+		'You approach and greet Albina, who turns to you and smiles, but stops short of hugging you.'
+		'"<<$pcs_nickname>>!! Please tell me you don''t practice with those bow-legged cows who call themselves dancers?" she asks with a smirk.'
+		'"I''m pretty good, but I don''t know if I''m quite on your level just yet." you reply.'
+		'"Hey, don''t sell yourself short <<$pcs_nickname>>." Albina responds with a smile. "Have you seen the people that take lessons here? Please. No amount of teaching will help them reach your skill level. You''ve got talent, which brings me to my next question."'
 
 		act 'Ask what she means':
 			*clr & cla
@@ -128,7 +128,7 @@ if $ARGS[0] = 'albina3':
 			'<center><b><font color="maroon"><<$npc_firstname[''A23'']>> <<$npc_lastname[''A23'']>></font></b></center>'
 			'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/characters/shared/photos/big23.jpg"></center>'
 			'Her words have grabbed your attention. "Do you mean?"'
-			'Albina just smiles. "Maybe. Watch how us professionals do it first, then see if you can keep up."'
+			'Albina just smiles. "Maybe. Watch us do it first, then see if you can keep up."'
 			'Turning to the other girls, she says "Alright girls. Let''s get to work."'
 			'An excitement builds within you. Is she really considering you for her group?'
 
@@ -146,7 +146,7 @@ if $ARGS[0] = 'albina4':
 	gs 'stat'
 	'The girls turn on their stereo and start dancing. It immediately becomes clear to you that they dance professionally, obviously better than you. Albina alone dances much better than you can. It is obvious that they have practiced this routine many times as their movements are closely synchronized with no wasted effort.'
 	'When the music ends, Albina says "Okay girls....take a breather."'
-	'She comes up to you, breathless. "You see...we are pros...real dancers. We are "The Starlets". We do shows and have even been in a music video."'
+	'She comes up to you, breathless. "You see...We are pros...Real dancers. We are "The Starlets". We do shows and have even been in a music video."'
 
 	if pregtime >= 90:
 		'You might try out for them after you''ve had your child.'
@@ -180,7 +180,7 @@ if $ARGS[0] = 'albina4':
 						!! If Sveta is popular/non dancer or meets the nerd/gopnik requirements and is virgin
 						'"Well, am I good enough to join?" you ask.'
 						'Albina thinks about it and looks at the other girls; some nod, others shrug.'
-						'Finally, she answers. "Okay, we''ll take a shot. Maybe you''ll learn something and be worthwhile. We practice every day, so don''t be late."'
+						'Finally, she answers. "Okay, we''ll take a shot. Maybe you''ll learn something and be worthwhile. We practice every day except Tuesday and Thursday, so don''t be late."'
 						'When the other girls leave, Albina pulls you aside. "Hey, are you ''pure''?" she whispers.'
 						'"Why would you want to know such a personal thing?" you reply as you blush.'
 						'"Oh, it''s...nothing. I just...look out for my girls is all." she says with hesitation.'
@@ -188,7 +188,7 @@ if $ARGS[0] = 'albina4':
 					else
 						'"Well, am I good enough to join?" you ask.'
 						'Albina thinks about it and looks at the other girls; some nod, others shrug in indifference.'
-						'Finally, she answers. "Okay, we''ll take a shot. Maybe you''ll learn something and be worthwhile. We practice every day, so don''t be late."'
+						'Finally, she answers. "Okay, we''ll take a shot. Maybe you''ll learn something and be worthwhile. We practice every day except Tuesday and Thursday, so don''t be late."'
 						AlbinaQW['StarletsJoined'] = 1
 					end
 
@@ -209,7 +209,7 @@ if $ARGS[0] = 'albina5':
 	gs 'stat'
 	'The girls turn on their stereo and start dancing. It immediately becomes clear to you that they dance professionally, but only slightly better than you. Only Albina outmatches your ability. It is obvious that they have practiced this routine many times as their movements are closely synchronized with no wasted effort.'
 	'When the music ends, Albina says "Okay girls....take a breather."'
-	'She comes up to you, breathless. "You see...We are pros...Real dancers. We are "The Starlets". We do shows and have even been in a music video."'
+	'She comes up to you, breathless. "These are...My Starlets. We do... professional shows and... have been in a music video..."'
 
 	if pregtime >= 90:
 		'You might try out for them after you''ve had your child.'
@@ -229,13 +229,13 @@ if $ARGS[0] = 'albina5':
 				'You begin to dance to the music and put very little effort into your moves before the other girls are pointing and talking to each other, intrigued by your skill. When the music stops, Albina walks up to you.'
 				'You stand panting before her as she gleefully claps. "I knew you could it!" she says.'
 				'"Do...what?" you reply.'
-				'"I had no doubts about you. You just had to prove yourself to the other girls before I could bring you onboard, and you have more than done that."'
+				'"We''ve been dancing together for years <<$pcs_nickname>>, so I had no doubts about you. The others here, they wanted to see you first. They didn''t believe me when I said you were <i>almost</i> as good as me."'
 				act 'You are a Starlet?!':
 					*clr & cla
 					minut += 5
 					gs 'stat'
 					'"You...mean...I''m a...Starlet?" you ask as you continue panting.'
-					'"Well of course you are! I can''t let someone as good as you go to waste on these amateurs. We practice every day, so don''t be late!" Albina replies.'
+					'"Well of course you are! I can''t let someone as good as you go to waste on these amateurs. We practice every day except for Tuesday and Thursday, so don''t be late!" Albina replies.'
 					AlbinaQW['StarletsJoined'] = 1
 					!! If Sveta is virgin
 					if pcs_vag = 0 and stat['vaginal'] = 0:
@@ -461,7 +461,7 @@ if $ARGS[0] = 'whore1':
 		guy += 1
 		'<center><video autoplay loop src="images/shared/sex/blowjob/kotovbj51.mp4"></video></center>'
 		'He unzips his pants and pulls his cock out. He stares down at you impatiently, so you start licking the length of his shaft and sucking on the head.'
-		'You take his length into your mouth and start sucking, while looking up to seek approval.'
+		'You take his length into your mouth and start sucking while looking up to seek approval.'
 		'"Oh yes, just like that you little fucking slut!"'
 		gs 'arousal', 'bj', 10, 'sub'
 		gs 'stat'
@@ -506,8 +506,8 @@ if $ARGS[0] = 'whore1':
 						cls
 						'<center><video autoplay loop src="images/shared/sex/cum/facial/facial0,3.mp4"></video></center>'
 						'You close your eyes just in time as spurts of warm cum splatter across your face. The man finishes with a loud, satisfied groan.'
-						'You are taken by surprise when he thrusts his cock back into your mouth and you are forced to suck it.'
-						'Your face is a wet, sticky mess of drool, tears and cum. The man makes some crude remarks, apparently aroused by the sight of you, before leaving you there.'
+						'You are taken by surprise when he thrusts his cock back into your mouth and you are forced to suck it again.'
+						'When he finishes, your face is a wet, sticky mess of drool, tears and cum. The man makes some crude remarks, apparently aroused by the sight of you, before leaving you there.'
 						gs 'arousal', 'bj', 10, 'sub', 'humiliation'
 						gs 'cum_call', 'face', $AlbinaQW['Cust']
 						gs 'stat'
@@ -529,7 +529,7 @@ if $ARGS[0] = 'whore1':
                 *nl				
 				'After what feels like an eternity, you feel his cock twitching inside you and a warmth floods your ass. He pulls out and his load trickles from your ravaged anus, which throbs in immense pain.'
 				'"Only that cute little head dancer has ever taken it in the ass better than you, whore. All the other bitches just cry." You let out a loud yelp as he finishes with a stinging smack on your ass that echoes into the room.'
-				'To your despair and disgust, he then forces you to lie on your side next to him with your ass hanging out, his sweaty, flabby arm wrapped around your back as he squeezes and slaps your ass while bragging on his phone to his friend about "some of the best anal" he''s ever had. This post sex torture finally ends 10 minutes later.'
+				'To your despair and disgust, he drags you up next to him and forces you to lie on your side next to him with your ass hanging out, his sweaty, flabby arm wrapped around your back as he squeezes and slaps your ass while bragging on his phone to his friend about "some of the best anal" he''s ever had. This post sex torture finally ends 10 minutes later.'
 				gs 'arousal', 'anal', 30, 'sub', 'humiliation', 'rough'
 				gs 'pain', 2, 'mouth', 'pull' 
 				gs 'pain', 2, 'asshole', 'stretch'
@@ -548,11 +548,11 @@ if $ARGS[0] = 'whore1':
 				'<center><video autoplay loop src="images/locations/pavlovsk/resident/apartment/shulginhome/smroom/event/rought/miss1.mp4"></video></center>'
 				'The man moves in, roughly flips you on your back and spreads your legs. "This pussy looks like it will be worth every ruble!" You feel the tip of his cock spread your labia apart as he pushes into you.'
 				'He grabs your throat and pins you to the bed as he starts to very roughly pound your pussy. He occasionally uses his other hand to very tightly squeeze and twist your nipple, making you squeal. He seems to enjoy treating you this roughly.'
-                'You panic when he stops thrusting and tightens his grip around your neck. You thrash your arms and legs in distress, but he just smiles and doesn''t loosen his grip until you are on the verge of blacking out. He then resumes fucking you, faster and seemingly closer to climax.'  
+                'You panic when he stops thrusting and tightens his grip around your neck. You choke as you thrash your arms and legs in distress, but he just smiles and doesn''t loosen his grip until you are on the verge of blacking out. He then resumes fucking you, faster and seemingly closer to climax.'  
 				*nl
 				'You endure the remainder of the rough sex for what feels like an eternity, but he eventually lets go of you and pulls out. He starts jerking his cock and you feel his cum splattering onto your labia.'
                 'He is annoyed at not being able to finish inside you. "A waste of a good fucking pussy if you can''t cum inside it I say, especially when it''s hot little numbers like you." he crudly remarks before climbing off of you. "That cute little head dancer is just begging for me to fill her smooth, tight as a vice fuck hole again, but he almost killed me for doing it once already." he adds.'
-				'To your despair and disgust, he then forces you into his now sweaty embrace, his flabby arm wrapped around your neck as he fondles and squeezes your breast while bragging on his phone to his friend about "the fine little pussy" he just fucked. This post sex torture finally ends 10 minutes later.'				
+				'To your despair and disgust, he drags you up next to him and forces you into his now sweaty embrace, his flabby arm wrapped around your neck as he fondles and squeezes your breast while bragging on his phone to his friend about "the fine little pussy" he just fucked. This post sex torture finally ends 10 minutes later.'				
 				gs 'pain', 2, 'throat', 'choke'
 				gs 'arousal', 'vaginal', 30, 'sub', 'humiliation', 'rough'
 				gs 'cum_call', 'precum', $AlbinaQW['Cust']
@@ -1219,7 +1219,7 @@ if $ARGS[0] = 'parkrally':
 	'After practice, Albina walks up to the group, furious. "My stupid father wants us to perform at his rally! Using us to try and win back some of his supporters!" she huffs.'
 	'She directs you to follow her, saying her father had someone drop off special outfits for you to wear. As you walk into the changing room, a box sits on the bench.'
 	'Albina pulls a lycra leotard out and her fist clenches around it as she sees how skimpy it is, but resigns herself and hands them out to the reluctant girls. '
-	'You undress and slide the outfit on. It''s skin tight and squeezes your breasts, your nipples poking through the fabric. The back isn''t much better. '
+	'You undress and slide the outfit on. It''s skin tight and squeezes your breasts, your nipples poking through the fabric. The back isn''t much better...'
 	'Albina walks up behind you and pulls your leotard from between your ass with her fingers. "We might as well dance in thongs for all these are covering!"'
 	'You jump slightly as she lets go and the fabric snaps back into place. "Let''s just get this over with. A car is waiting for us outside."'
 
@@ -1244,7 +1244,7 @@ end
 if $ARGS[0] = 'Starletsreact':
 	cla
 	menu_off = 1
-	'As you approach the group, Albina motions you aside. "What the hell <<$pcs_nickname>>!? Who knocked you up?" Her eyes then grow wide. "It wasn''t one of <i>them</i> was it? Regardless, you can''t dance if you''re pregnant! I''m sorry, but I''m going to have to cut you loose." she says while placing a hand on your shoulder.' 
+	'As you approach the group, Albina motions you aside. "What the fuck <<$pcs_nickname>>!? Who knocked you up?" Her eyes then grow wide. "It wasn''t one of <i>them</i> was it? Regardless, you can''t dance if you''re pregnant! I''m sorry, but I''m going to have to cut you loose." she says while placing a hand on your shoulder.' 
 	'You nod in understanding and say your goodbyes before Albina walks back to the group, directing them to start from the beginning.'
 	minut += 5
 	gs 'stat'

+ 3 - 3
locations/albinahome.qsrc

@@ -532,11 +532,11 @@ if $ARGS[0] = 'wear_strapon':
 		gs 'arousal', 'vaginal_strap_give', 8, 'lesbian'
 		gs 'stat'
 		act 'Fuck her ass': gt 'albinahome', 'fuck_albina_ass'
-		act 'Ride it like you mean it':
+		act 'Fuck her faster':
 			*clr & cla
 			gs 'stat'
 			'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/characters/pavlovsk/school/girl/albina/sex/game/givevag.jpg"></center>'
-			'You slap her on the ass. "Come on Albina! Ride it like you mean it." With your encouragement, she starts really riding you hard and fast, her huge ass slapping against your thighs as she takes the whole length inside her. She rides you for several minutes until she cries out in ecstasy. She slams down on the dildo and her body shudders as an intense orgasm passes through her. She slides off the dildo, which glistens with her juices, and collapses on the bed next to you.'
+			'You slap her on the ass. "Come on Albina! Ride it like you mean it." With your encouragement, she starts really riding you hard and fast, her ass slapping against your thighs as she takes the whole length inside her. She rides you for several minutes until she cries out in ecstasy and slams down on the dildo, her body shuddering as an intense orgasm passes through her. She slides off the dildo, which glistens with her juices, and collapses on the bed next to you.'
 			'Once her orgasm has passed, she looks at you with an appreciative smile on her face.'
 			gs 'arousal', 'vaginal_strap_give', 7, 'lesbian'
 			gs 'stat'
@@ -645,7 +645,7 @@ if $ARGS[0] = 'albina_ass_fucks_you':
 		gs 'stat'
 		'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/characters/pavlovsk/school/girl/albina/sex/game/anal2.jpg"></center>'
 		'Once you are comfortable with her in your ass, she stands up over you and starts getting harder and faster with the ass fucking she is giving you. When it starts getting a little too rough, she seems to notice and backs off just a little before getting into a nice rhythm of slamming the dildo in and out of your ass. She enjoys fucking you hard, growing more aroused over time.' 
-		'Just as it is starting to hurt, she stops and lets out a pleasured moan before pulling out of you. You feel a rush of cold air around your gaping asshole. "You were such a good little butt slut <<$pcs_nickname>>." she says. You turn and see her sliding the harness off, apparently finished with you. You also notice the wet patch on the bed. She obviously greatly enjoyed hammering your ass.'
+		'Just as it is starting to hurt, she stops and lets out a pleasured moan before pulling out of you. You feel a rush of cold air around your gaping asshole. "You were such a good little butt slut <<$pcs_nickname>>." she says as you turn and see her sliding the harness off, apparently finished with you. You also notice the wet patch on the bed. She obviously greatly enjoyed hammering your ass.'
 		gs 'arousal', 'anal_strap', 10, 'lesbian'
 		gs 'stat'
 		act 'Finish': gt 'albinahome', 'strapon_finish'

+ 4 - 4
locations/danceGev.qsrc

@@ -18,15 +18,15 @@ if danceevtimes >= 5:dancegevtipe = rand(0, 3)
 '<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/locations/pavlovsk/community/dance_studio/ev<<dancegevtipe>>.jpg"></center>'
 
 if dancegevtipe = 0:
-	'You see Veronichka Mokhova doing stretches, you watch as see does the splits her g-string leaving nothing to your imagination.'
+	'You see a rather well toned girl doing stretches. You watch as she does the splits, her skimpy g-string leaving nothing to your imagination.'
 	if lesbian > 0:gs 'arousal', 'voyeur', 5
 	gs 'stat'
 elseif dancegevtipe = 1:
-	'You see Veronichka Mokhova doing a handstand.'
+	'You see another girl in the class doing a handstand.'
 elseif dancegevtipe = 2:
-	'You watch Veronichka Mokhova warming up.'
+	'You watch another girl warming up before she starts practicing.'
 elseif dancegevtipe = 3:
-	'Veronichka Mokhova goes from a handstand to the splits, you realise she is not wear any panties and probably thought she was alone.'
+	'You watch as a girl goes from doing a handstand to the splits, before noticing that she isn''t wearing any panties and has both her holes on show.'
 	if lesbian > 0:gs 'arousal', 'voyeur', 5
 	gs 'stat'
 end

+ 1 - 1
locations/preSYS.qsrc

@@ -806,7 +806,7 @@ if $ARGS[0] = 'dancer':
 	'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/system/intro/sys/altstart13.jpg"></center>'
 	'You fell in love with dancing at an early age and never looked back. You spent a lot of your free time trying to improve your skills, and it paid off; you''re actually quite good now! <<$npc_firstname[''A11'']>> helpfully pointed out that an added benefit of dance was a greater increase in your flexibility (that is, of course, typical of <<$npc_firstname[''A11'']>>). Your obsession with dancing, however, has had some repercussions on your school performance. You''re a sub-par student, and you haven''t made many friends other than your fellow jocks.' 
 	*nl
-	'You are particularly close with <<$npc_firstname[''A23'']>>, who is just as passionate about dancing as you are.'
+	'You are particularly close with <<$npc_firstname[''A23'']>>, who is just as passionate about dancing as you are. You trained a lot together as children and have a mutual respect for each other''s abilities.'
 	act 'Select another': gt 'preSYS', 'charselect'
 	act 'Confirm this option':
 		gs 'preSYS', 'jock'