Browse Source

Merge remote-tracking branch 'upstream/master'

Netuttki 2 years ago
parent
commit
8adbf64b4b

+ 1 - 1
locations/gschool_gossip.qsrc

@@ -145,7 +145,7 @@ end
 
 if $ARGS[0] = 'mixed':
 	if $ARGS[1] = 'picture':
-		'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/locations/pavlovsk/school/events/join_cool.jpg"></center>'
+		'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/locations/pavlovsk/school/events/joincool.jpg"></center>'
 		'Walking down the halls, you barely notice the poor state of the school anymore, having grown used to it. Approaching your locker, you see several of your classmates who you wave to. As you do, you overhear some of them talking about a variety of things, including some juicy gossip.'
 		*nl
 	end

+ 4 - 0
locations/gschool_lessons.qsrc

@@ -368,6 +368,10 @@ if $ARGS[0] = 'grade_check':
 		'You''re only getting top marks in some of your classes, but only a few of your grades are bad and you''re not failing any classes. You should have no trouble getting into university, but improving your grades wouldn''t hurt.'
 	elseif class['school_grades_above_90'] > 0 and class['school_grades_above_70'] > 10: 
 		'You''re only getting top marks in a few of your classes and are failing others. You should improve your grades if you want to get into university.'
+	elseif class['school_grades_above_90'] > 0 and class['school_grades_above_40'] = 13: 
+		'You''re only getting top marks in some of your classes and a lot of bad grades, but you''re not failing any classes. You need to improve your bad grades if you want to get into university.'
+	elseif class['school_grades_above_90'] > 0 and class['school_grades_above_40'] > 10: 
+		'You''re getting top marks in a few of your classes, but are failing some of the others. You should improve your grades if you want to get into university.'
 	elseif class['school_grades_above_90'] > 0 and class['school_grades_above_40'] > 6: 
 		'You''re getting top marks in a few of your classes, but are failing a lot of the others. You should improve your grades if you want to get into university.'
 	elseif class['school_grades_above_90'] > 0: 

+ 31 - 31
locations/intro_city.qsrc

@@ -76,7 +76,7 @@ if $ARGS[0] = 'city_intro':
 	pcs_hairlng = 100
 	*clr & cla
 	!!pic of apartment or Gazelle?
-	'The big day has finally arrived! Your family piled into your stepfather''s Gazelle pickup and you all traveled from your hometown, Pavlovsk, to the big city of St. Petersburg. Today is the day you move into your own apartment and start this new phase of your life.'
+	'The big day has finally arrived! Your family piled into your stepfather''s Gazelle pickup and you all traveled from your hometown, Pavlovsk, to St. Petersburg. Today is the day you move into your own apartment and start this new phase of your life.'
 	'You think back to your school days and what kind of student you were...'
 
 	act 'Continue': gt 'intro_city_select', 'start'
@@ -87,7 +87,7 @@ if $ARGS[0] = '2':
 	'<center><b><font color = maroon>CHARACTER CUSTOMIZATION</font></b></center>'
 	'<center><b>Allows you to alter hair and eyes, use to match fixed profile picture if in use.</b></center>'
 	'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/system/1_openings/shared/character_creation_2.jpg"></center>'
-	'As you look in the mirror, your face comes into focus. Some aspects of your appearance are already set, you can define the others now.'
+	'As you look in the mirror, your face comes into focus. While some aspects of your appearance are already set, you can define the others now.'
 	'You are fairly tall.'
 	*nl
 	'<center>Customize your:</center>'
@@ -103,7 +103,7 @@ if $ARGS[0] = 'vlad_intro':
 	*clr & cla
 	'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/characters/shared/headshots_main/big28.jpg"></center>'
 	!!basic desc of Vlad, maybe a preset is used somewhere in game already? If not already in the intro (I think it is.)
-	'Having spent almost an hour in the cramped truck, you jump out as soon as you arrive. Vlad gets out and stretches a bit, before heading to the back of the Gazelle to start unloading your stuff.'
+	'Having spent almost an hour in the cramped truck, you jump out as soon as you arrive. Vladimir gets out and stretches before heading to the back of the Gazelle to start unloading your stuff.'
 
 	act 'Check Kolka': gt 'intro_city', 'kolka_intro'
 end
@@ -113,8 +113,8 @@ if $ARGS[0] = 'kolka_intro':
 	*clr & cla
 	'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/characters/shared/headshots_main/big34.jpg"></center>'
 	!!basic desc of Kolka, maybe a preset is used somewhere in game already? If not already in the intro (I think it is.)
-	'Your brother, caught up in the excitement of seeing the city, tries to slide past Vlad unnoticed but is called back to help unload. He sighs and shuffles his feet a bit before turning around to help his dad get your stuff.'
-	'Giving him a smile to encourage him, you thank him for helping. Your effort pays off, his chest puffs out a bit as he starts to help his father.'
+	'Your brother, caught up in the excitement of seeing the city, tries to slide past Vladimir unnoticed, but is called back to help unload. He sighs and shuffles his feet before turning around to help.'
+	'Giving him an encouraging smile, you thank him for helping. Your effort pays off, his chest puffing out as he starts to help his father.'
 
 	act 'Head inside': gt 'intro_city', 'anya_intro'
 end
@@ -125,7 +125,7 @@ if $ARGS[0] = 'anya_intro':
 	'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/characters/shared/headshots_main/big33.jpg"></center>'
 	!!basic desc of Anya, maybe a preset is used somewhere in game already? If not already in the intro (I think it is.)
 	'Your sister comes up to you, links her arm with yours, and pulls you forward. "Come on, <<$pcs_nickname>>! I want to see this place."'
-	'Already knowing the answer, you ask anyway "Why don''t you have your own apartment then?"'
+	'Already knowing the answer, you ask anyway. "Why don''t you have your own apartment then?"'
 	'"I''m comfortable where I am right now. When I''m ready, maybe I will."'
 	'Rolling your eyes, you let her keep pulling on your arm.'
 
@@ -140,9 +140,9 @@ if $ARGS[0] = 'apartment_intro':
 	!! Intro to apartment
 	*clr & cla
 	'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/locations/city/residential/apartment/home/korr.jpg"></center>'
-	'Once you get inside you look around, already trying to decide where things should go. Anya sees this, and laughing, drags you through each room to check them out.'
-	'By the time you''re done Kolka and Vladimir have started bringing boxes in. "Your <<$npc_nickname[''A29'']>> is staying outside for a bit to keep an eye on your stuff. I don''t think she likes the neighborhood much," he says with a shrug.'
-	'Both you and Anya pick up the boxes they set down and take them to the rooms they were labeled for, while your brother and stepfather bring it all inside.'
+	'Once inside you look around, already trying to decide where things should go. Anya sees this, and laughing, drags you through each room to check them out.'
+	'By the time you''re done, Kolka and Vladimir have started bringing boxes in. "Your <<$npc_nickname[''A29'']>> is staying outside to keep an eye on your stuff. I don''t think she likes the neighborhood much," he says with a shrug.'
+	'You and Anya pick up the boxes they set down and take them to the rooms they were labeled for while your brother and stepfather bring it all inside.'
 
 	act 'Greet <<$npc_nickname[''A29'']>>': gt 'intro_city', 'mom_intro'
 end
@@ -151,32 +151,32 @@ if $ARGS[0] = 'mom_intro':
 	!! Intro to Mom - answer sets relationship level
 	*clr & cla
 	'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/characters/shared/headshots_main/big29.jpg"></center>'
-	'Your <<$npc_nickname[''A29'']>> comes inside finally, carrying food she made ahead of time to feed everybody.'
-	'"<<$pcs_nickname>>, this is a pretty rough neighborhood. You need to be really careful of those boys outside. The sooner University starts the better, so you can get out of here. I don''t know why you couldn''t just wait until summer ended to move to the city."'
-	act 'I will be fine (neutral response)':
+	'Your <<$npc_nickname[''A29'']>> finally comes inside, carrying food she made ahead of time for everyone.'
+	'"<<$pcs_nickname>>, this is a pretty rough neighborhood. You need to be really careful of those boys outside. The sooner university starts and you can get out of here, the better. I don''t know why you couldn''t just wait until summer ended to move to the city."'
+	act 'I''ll be fine':
 		gs 'npc_relationship', 'set', 'A29', '50'
 		*clr & cla
 		'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/characters/shared/headshots_main/big29.jpg"></center>'
-		'"Everything will be fine, <<$npc_nickname[''A29'']>>. I will look into university prices and decide then."'
-		'She gives you a hug before going to the kitchen to start setting up everybody with a plate of food.'
+		'"Everything will be fine, <<$npc_nickname[''A29'']>>. I''ll look into university prices and decide then."'
+		'She gives you a hug before going to the kitchen to start preparing lunch.'
 
 		act 'Have lunch': gt 'intro_city', 'lunch_break'
 	end
-	act 'Give it a rest (angry response)':
+	act 'Give it a rest':
 		gs 'npc_relationship', 'set', 'A29', '30'
 		*clr & cla
 		'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/characters/shared/headshots_main/big29.jpg"></center>'
-		'"Just stop <<$npc_nickname[''A29'']>>! I''m an adult now, and I will do whatever I want with who I want!"'
-		'Her eyes flash in anger, but she doesn''t say anything. She goes to the kitchen to start setting up everybody with a plate of food.'
+		'"Just stop <<$npc_nickname[''A29'']>>! I''m an adult now, and I''ll do whatever I want with whoever I want!"'
+		'Her eyes flash in anger, but she doesn''t say anything. She then heads into the kitchen to prepare lunch.'
 
 		act 'Have lunch': gt 'intro_city', 'lunch_break'
 	end
-	act 'Don''t worry (loving response)':
+	act 'Don''t worry':
 		gs 'npc_relationship', 'set', 'A29', '70'
 		*clr & cla
 		'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/characters/shared/headshots_main/big29.jpg"></center>'
-		'"I know, don''t worry so much <<$npc_nickname[''A29'']>>. I will be very careful, I promise. It''s only for a few months."'
-		'She gives you a big hug before going to the kitchen to start setting up everybody with a plate of food.'
+		'"I know, don''t worry so much <<$npc_nickname[''A29'']>>. I''ll be very careful, I promise. It''s only for a few months."'
+		'She gives you a hug before going to the kitchen to prepare lunch.'
 
 		act 'Have lunch': gt 'intro_city', 'lunch_break'
 	end
@@ -188,12 +188,12 @@ if $ARGS[0] = 'lunch_break':
 	if npc_rel['A29'] >= 60:
 		'<<$npc_nickname[''A29'']>> hands you a plate with a big smile as you all sit down at your kitchen table.'
 	elseif npc_rel['A29'] <= 30:
-		'Lunch is a little tense at first, but for the most part everybody is used to you and your <<$npc_nickname[''A29'']>> fighting.'
+		'Lunch is a little tense at first, but everyone is used to you and your <<$npc_nickname[''A29'']>> fighting.'
 	else
-		'<<$npc_nickname[''A29'']>> hands plates of food as you all sit down at your kitchen table.'
+		'<<$npc_nickname[''A29'']>> hands out plates of food as you all sit down at your kitchen table.'
 	end
-	'Before long, you are all laughing and joking with each other as you eat. You are still looking forward to being on your own, but you know times like this meal will become pretty rare once they head home.'
-	'Once the meal is done and <<$npc_nickname[''A29'']>> cleans up the mess, everybody stands up to say goodbye.'
+	'Before long, you''re all laughing and joking with each other as you eat. You''re still looking forward to being on your own, but you know times like this will become pretty rare once they head home.'
+	'Once everyone is finished and <<$npc_nickname[''A29'']>> clears up, they all prepare to say goodbye.'
 
 	act 'Say goodbye to your family': gt 'intro_city', 'family_goodbye'
 end
@@ -202,17 +202,17 @@ if $ARGS[0] = 'family_goodbye':
 	!! Say goodbye to your family
 	*clr & cla
 	'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/locations/city/residential/apartment/home/korr.jpg"></center>'
-	'Anya gives a big hug, congratulates you on getting your own place, and then steps back to give the rest of your family room to do the same. Your brother gives you an awkward hug and whispers to text him what it''s like before stepping back too.'
-	'Vladimir comes over and hugs you too, tells you how proud he is to be your stepfather and to call if you need anything.'
+	'Anya gives a hug and congratulates you on getting your own place. Your brother gives you an awkward hug and whispers to text him what it''s like living on your own.'
+	'Vladimir then comes over and hugs you too, telling you how proud he is to be your stepfather and to call if you need anything.'
 	if npc_rel['A29'] >= 60:
-		'Your <<$npc_nickname[''A29'']>> finishes what she is doing and comes over, tears in her eyes. Wrapping you in a big hug, she reminds you again to stay away from the boys outside, before joining the rest of the family by the door.'
+		'Your <<$npc_nickname[''A29'']>> finishes what she''s doing and comes over, tears in her eyes. Wrapping you in a hug, she again reminds you to stay away from the boys outside before joining the rest of the family by the door.'
 	elseif npc_rel['A29'] <= 30:
-		'Your <<$npc_nickname[''A29'']>> finishes what she is doing and comes over and gives you an awkward hug, saying she is sorry for fighting with you on your big day, before joining the rest of the family by the door.'
+		'Your <<$npc_nickname[''A29'']>> finishes what she''s doing and gives you an awkward hug, apologising for fighting with you before joining the rest of the family by the door.'
 	else
-		'Your <<$npc_nickname[''A29'']>> finishes what she is doing and comes over and gives you a hug and reminds you to stay away from the boys outside, before joining the rest of the family by the door.'
+		'Your <<$npc_nickname[''A29'']>> finishes what she''s doing and comes over and gives you a hug, again reminding you to stay away from the boys outside before joining the rest of the family by the door.'
 	end
 	*nl
-	'They all wave and head out, leaving you alone for the first time. You spend some time unpacking your stuff, before you stop and stretch, deciding you can finish later.'
+	'They all wave and head out, leaving you alone for the first time. You spend some time unpacking your stuff before you stop and stretch, deciding you can finish later.'
 
 	act 'Continue': gt 'intro_city', 'welcome_intro'
 end
@@ -227,7 +227,7 @@ if $ARGS[0] = 'welcome_intro':
 	*clr & cla
 	'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/system/1_openings/5_city/city_start.jpg"></center>'
 	'Welcome to Girl Life. You are finally free of your parents and ready to face all the freedoms and challenges that entails. Your options are nearly unlimited and now it''s time to go out and discover them all.'
-	'Don''t forget to enroll in university during August, if that''s a goal you want to pursue.'
+	'Don''t forget to enroll in university during August if that''s a goal you want to pursue.'
 
 	act 'Start the game': gt 'korr'
 end

+ 24 - 22
locations/intro_city_select.qsrc

@@ -137,10 +137,10 @@ if $ARGS[0] = 'charselect':
 	act 'Nerd':
 		*clr & cla
 		gs 'intro_city_select', 'nerdinfo'
-		act 'I am the Queen of the Nerds!': gt 'intro_city_select', 'nerdqueen'
-		act 'I am a good student': gt 'intro_city_select', 'goodstudent'
-		act 'I am a computer geek': gt 'intro_city_select', 'computergeek'
-		act 'I am an avid chess player': gt 'intro_city_select', 'chessplayer'
+		act 'I was the Queen of the Nerds!': gt 'intro_city_select', 'nerdqueen'
+		act 'I was a good student': gt 'intro_city_select', 'goodstudent'
+		act 'I was a computer geek': gt 'intro_city_select', 'computergeek'
+		act 'I was an avid chess player': gt 'intro_city_select', 'chessplayer'
 
 	end
 
@@ -157,8 +157,8 @@ if $ARGS[0] = 'charselect':
 !!if we can do school uniforms gets an appropriate or borderline uniform.
 		*clr & cla
 		gs 'intro_city_select', 'popularinfo'
-		act 'I have a lot of friends': gt 'intro_city_select', 'socialite'
-		act 'I am beautiful': gt 'intro_city_select', 'beautiful'
+		act 'I had a lot of friends': gt 'intro_city_select', 'socialite'
+		act 'I was beautiful': gt 'intro_city_select', 'beautiful'
 	end
 
 	act 'Gopnik':
@@ -174,11 +174,11 @@ if $ARGS[0] = 'charselect':
 	act 'Outcast':
 		*clr & cla
 		gs 'intro_city_select', 'outcastinfo'
-		act 'I have no friends': gt 'intro_city_select', 'friendless'
-		act 'I am an ugly duckling': gt 'intro_city_select', 'uglyduckling'
-		act 'I am a good girl': gt 'intro_city_select', 'goodgirl'
-		act 'I am a slut': gt 'intro_city_select', 'slut'
-		act 'I am the resident goth': gt 'intro_city_select', 'goth'
+		act 'I had no friends': gt 'intro_city_select', 'friendless'
+		act 'I was an ugly duckling': gt 'intro_city_select', 'uglyduckling'
+		act 'I was a good girl': gt 'intro_city_select', 'goodgirl'
+		act 'I was a slut': gt 'intro_city_select', 'slut'
+		act 'I was the resident goth': gt 'intro_city_select', 'goth'
 	end
 
 	act 'Random personality':
@@ -266,39 +266,38 @@ end
 if $ARGS[0] = 'nerdinfo':
 	'<center><h4><font color="maroon">Nerd</font></h4></center>'
 	'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/system/1_openings/2_sg/nerd_0.jpg"></center>'
-	'Growing up, you spent virtually all of your free time at home, pursuing various cerebral pursuits. These might have included reading comics, fantasy or sci-fi books, learning about chess or computers or playing cards, board games and RPGs with the other nerds, in addition to faithfully going to school. While you have gained a huge amount of knowledge from this, your lack of interest in exercising as a child has left your body a little frail.'
-	*nl
-	'The long nights of trying to read in poor light have also taken a toll on your eyesight and you now require glasses. Your cerebral pursuits have also had somewhat of a negative impact on your friendship with <<$npc_firstname[''A11'']>> as you grew up. He became a gopnik and the two of you slowly started hanging out less and less, although you still consider each other to be friends. On the plus side, doing well in school has made your parents happy and has left you with some extra spending money as a reward for your hard work. Now...'
+	'Growing up, you spent virtually all of your free time at home, pursuing various cerebral pursuits. These might have included reading comics, fantasy or sci-fi books, learning about chess or computers or playing cards, board games and RPGs with the other nerds, in addition to faithfully going to school. While you gained a huge amount of knowledge from this, your lack of interest in exercising as a child has left your body a little frail.'
+	'The long nights of trying to read in poor light have also taken a toll on your eyesight and you now require glasses. Your cerebral pursuits also had somewhat of a negative impact on your friendship with <<$npc_firstname[''A11'']>> as you grew up. He became a gopnik and the two of you slowly started hanging out often, although you still considered each other to be friends. On the plus side, doing well in school made your parents happy. You were...'
 	*nl
 end
 
 if $ARGS[0] = 'jockinfo':
 	'<center><h4><font color="maroon">Jock</font></h4></center>'
 	'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/system/1_openings/2_sg/jock_0.jpg"></center>'
-	'While you were growing up, you spent virtually all of your free time outdoors. You loved playing sports, running, biking and hiking. This has kept you in fairly good shape, as well as decently socially active in a variety of team sports over the years. Doing this, however, negatively impacted your friendship with <<$npc_firstname[''A11'']>>. As you grew up, he became a gopnik and the two of you slowly started hanging out less and less, although you still consider each other to be friends. From all the sports available, you are an...'
+	'While you were growing up, you spent virtually all of your free time outdoors. You loved playing sports, running, biking and hiking. This has kept you in fairly good shape, as well as decently socially active in a variety of team sports over the years. Doing this, however, negatively impacted your friendship with <<$npc_firstname[''A11'']>>. As you grew up, he became a gopnik and the two of you slowly started hanging out less often, although you still considered each other to be friends. From all the sports available, you were an...'
 	*nl
 end
 
 if $ARGS[0] = 'popularinfo':
 	'<center><h4><font color="maroon">Popular</font></h4></center>'
 	'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/system/1_openings/2_sg/popular_0.jpg"></center>'
-	'You spent most of your childhood outdoors, playing with other boys and girls. As a result, you''re quite healthy. You''re also pretty strong verbally, with a keen understanding about how to get yourself out of trouble (or shifting the blame to someone else). You were never interested in school or sports, however, and are only a sub-par student. Your popularity has negatively impacted your relationship with <<$npc_firstname[''A11'']>> somewhat, and you are not as close as you once were. Now...'
+	'You spent most of your childhood outdoors, playing with other boys and girls. As a result, you''re quite healthy and have a keen understanding about how to get yourself out of trouble (or shifting the blame to someone else). You were never interested in school or sports, however, and are only a sub-par student. Your popularity has negatively impacted your relationship with <<$npc_firstname[''A11'']>>, and you weren''t as close as you once were. You were popular because...'
 	*nl
 end
 
 if $ARGS[0] = 'gopnikinfo':
 	'<center><h4><font color="maroon">Gopnik</font></h4></center>'
 	'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/system/1_openings/2_sg/gopnik_0.jpg"></center>'
-	'You spent most of your childhood outdoors, playing with the other girls and boys. As a result, you''re quite healthy. As you got older, you lost any interest you might have once had with fitting in - now you do your own thing, and you''re ready to tell anyone where they can stick it if they have a problem with that.'
-	'As you and <<$npc_firstname[''A11'']>> walked a similar path, your bond of friendship only deepened. This has had some repercussions on your school performance; you''re a sub-par student. It has also had some less enjoyable consequences, leading you into more than your fair share of fights, into all sorts of problems at home, landing you in trouble at school and even into a few run-ins with the local police. Now most consider you...'
+	'You spent most of your childhood outdoors, playing with other boys and girls. As a result, you''re quite healthy. As you got older, you lost any interest you might have once had with fitting in - now you do your own thing, and you''re ready to tell anyone where they can stick it if they have a problem with that.'
+	'As you and <<$npc_firstname[''A11'']>> walked a similar path, your bond of friendship only deepened. This has had some repercussions on your school performance; you''re a sub-par student. It has also had some less than enjoyable consequences, leading you into more than your fair share of fights, into all sorts of problems at home, landing you in trouble at school and even into a few run-ins with the local police. Most people considered you to be...'
 	*nl
 end
 
 if $ARGS[0] = 'outcastinfo':
 	'<center><h4><font color="maroon">Outcast</font></h4></center>'
 	'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/system/1_openings/2_sg/outcast_0.jpg"></center>'
-	'You never really fit in. You''re just one of those individuals who, by choice or circumstance, never really clicked with the other kids. As you got older things only got worse, and now you are seen as an outcast. This breaks one of the most important social rules among your peers, and you are now considered in the same vein as sluts, losers, gay boys and the like.'
-	'Being an outcast has also had a somewhat negative impact on your friendship with <<$npc_firstname[''A11'']>>. As you grew up, he became a gopnik and the two of you slowly started hanging out less and less, although you still consider each other to be friends - if just barely. You have no other real friends, and you get bullied and made fun of all the time because...'
+	'You never really fit in. You''re just one of those individuals who, by choice or circumstance, never really clicked with the other kids. As you got older things only got worse, and you were seen as an outcast and considered in the same vein as sluts, losers, gay boys and the like.'
+	'Being an outcast also had a somewhat negative impact on your friendship with <<$npc_firstname[''A11'']>>. As you grew up, he became a gopnik and the two of you slowly started hanging out, although you still considered each other to be friends - if just barely. You had no other real friends, and you were bullied and made fun of all the time because...'
 	*nl
 end
 
@@ -370,6 +369,7 @@ if $ARGS[0] = 'nerdqueen':
 			pcs_lashes = 1
 		end
 		pcs_skin = 400
+		pcs_butt = 12
 		genbsize = 22
 !!d cup for ideal bmi
 		salo = 87
@@ -394,7 +394,8 @@ end
 if $ARGS[0] = 'goodstudent':
 	'<center><h4><font color="maroon">Good student</font></h4></center>'
 	'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/system/1_openings/2_sg/nerd_2.jpg"></center>'
-	'You just loved school, and your grades were more than good enough to attend the university of your choosing after graduation. You have always tried to absorb every bit of knowledge possible and did everything you could to excel in school, and while this attitude gained you a lot of respect from the other nerds, it did not earn you a lot of friends and you never found the time for sports. You were often asked to be a tutor and sometimes found yourself forced to do others'' homework for them.' 
+	'You just loved school, and your grades were more than good enough to attend the university of your choosing after graduation. You have always tried to absorb every bit of knowledge possible and did everything you could to excel in school.' 
+	'While this attitude gained you a lot of respect from the other nerds, it didn''t earn you a lot of friends and you never found the time for sports. You were often asked to be a tutor and sometimes found yourself forced to do others'' homework for them.' 
 	'Now you are in the big city with a whole new world to absorb, although a part of you already misses school.'
 	act 'Select another option': gt 'intro_city_select', 'charselect'
 	act 'Confirm this option':
@@ -437,7 +438,8 @@ end
 if $ARGS[0] = 'computergeek':
 	'<center><h4><font color="maroon">Computer geek</font></h4></center>'
 	'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/system/1_openings/2_sg/nerd_3.jpg"></center>'
-	'You were always into computers, whether it be by playing video games, taking computers apart or learning programing and even hacking. You love everything about computers, but this passion left you little time to make friends - real-life friends, at least. You managed to befriend many online players that you talk to while you play various video games, however, and you rarely spend any time outdoors, nor money on clothes or other girly stuff. You are far more interested in saving your money for a better computer in order to play even better games.' 
+	'You were always into computers, whether it be by playing video games, taking computers apart or learning programing and even hacking. You love everything about computers, but this passion left you little time to make friends - real-life friends, at least.' 
+	'You managed to befriend many online players that you talked to while playing various video games, however, and you rarely spent any time outdoors, nor money on clothes or other girly stuff. You were far more interested in saving your money for a better computer in order to play even better games.' 
 	'Now you are on your own in the big city, and you will need most of your money to live on instead.'
 	act 'Select another option': gt 'intro_city_select', 'charselect'
 	act 'Confirm this option':

+ 109 - 186
locations/intro_city_tg.qsrc

@@ -9,37 +9,36 @@ if $ARGS[0] = 'start':
 	menu_off = 1
 	'<center><b><font color="maroon">Apartment</font></b></center>'
 	'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/system/1_openings/1_tf/1.jpg"></center>'
-	'You wake up to the sound of your alarm clock. You hear Luda, your wife, mumbling next to you, "Don''t want to, it''s too early." She pulls her blanket up and rolls over. You reach over and turn the clock off.'
+	'You wake up to the sound of your alarm clock and hear Luda, your wife, mumbling next to you. "Don''t want to, it''s too early." She pulls her blanket up and rolls over. You reach over and turn the clock off.'
 	*nl
-	'<i>There are days when I just want to keep on sleeping</i>, you think to yourself. <i>But I can''t, not today.</i>'
+	'<i>There are days when I just want to keep sleeping,</i> you think to yourself. <i>But I can''t, not today.</i>'
 	act 'Go to the bathroom':
 		*clr & cla
 		'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/system/1_openings/1_tf/mikhail_2.jpg"></center>'
-		'Quietly, so that you don''t wake up your daughter, you go to the bathroom and take care of your morning routine.'
+		'Being careful not to wake up your daughter, you head to the bathroom and take care of your morning routine.'
 		act 'Leave the apartment':
 			*clr & cla
 			'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/system/1_openings/1_tf/3.jpg"></center>'
-			'In a parking lot near your house sits your car. You unlock it with the remote key and climb in.'
+			'Your car sits in a parking lot near your house. You unlock it with the remote key and climb in.'
 			act 'Go to work':
 				*clr & cla
 				'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/system/1_openings/1_tf/4.jpg"></center>'
-				'You turn the key and the engine roars to life. As you drive to work the roads are filled with traffic, but it''s the morning rush hour, so it''s no surprise. You drive for what feels like an eternity, give or take an hour, but you eventually reach the office. The music on the radio was pleasant, at least.'
+				'You turn the key and the engine roars to life. The morning rush hour means that the roads are filled with traffic as you head to work. You drive for what feels like an eternity, but you eventually reach the office. The music on the radio was pleasant, at least.'
 				act 'Park at the office':
 					*clr & cla
 					'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/system/1_openings/1_tf/5.jpg"></center>'
-					'You pull into a parking lot near the building and manage to find a good spot. You greet the security guard on your way in to the building, and then go upstairs to your office. Shortly after you sit down at your desk and boot up your computer, your boss''s secretary comes in and hands you a folder with several travel documents.'
+					'You pull into a parking lot near the building and manage to find a good spot. You greet the security guard on your way in before heading upstairs to your office. Shortly after you sit down at your desk and boot up your computer, your boss''s secretary comes in and hands you a folder with several travel documents.'
 					*nl
-					'"Am I going on a business trip or something?" you ask her.'
+					'"Am I going on a business trip or something?" you inquire.'
 					*nl
-					'"Yes, the director said it had something to do with a construction project, out in the middle of nowhere, but that''s pretty much all I know," Oksana says.'
+					'"Yes, the director said it had something to do with a construction project out in the middle of nowhere. That''s pretty much all I know," she replies.'
 					*nl
 					'After she leaves, you read over the travel documents and fill them out. Time to go to the director.'
 					act 'Go and see your boss':
 						*clr & cla
 						'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/system/1_openings/shared/npc_roman.jpg"></center>'
 						'You head into the directors'' office, greet him and hand him the papers to sign. The director, Roman Gromov, scans through the text before signing off on it with a broad, sweeping stroke.'
-						*nl
-						'"Ms. Glavbukh is in her office. Go get some travel money while I make a few calls. We''ll discuss your trip when you get back."'
+						'"Ms. Glavbukh is in her office. Get some travel money while I make a few calls. We''ll discuss your trip when you get back."'
 						act 'Go to the chief accountant':
 							*clr & cla
 							'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/system/1_openings/shared/npc_marina.jpg"></center>'
@@ -47,21 +46,17 @@ if $ARGS[0] = 'start':
 							act 'Return to the director':
 								*clr & cla
 								'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/system/1_openings/shared/npc_roman.jpg"></center>'
-								'Roman is busy talking on the phone when you re-enter the his office, he gestures for you to sit down on one of the chairs across from him.'
-								*nl
-								'"Yes, I understand... yes. I will send Mikhail over ASAP, he''ll represent me... Yes... Tell your men to work on some other parts of the project in the meantime. Have Igor guard the pit and let no one make any fuss, and make sure nobody gets wind of this and, you know, try to halt the construction... Okay, we''ll keep in touch."'
+								'Roman is busy talking on the phone when you re-enter the his office. He gestures for you to sit down on one of the chairs across from him.'
 								*nl
-								'Roman hangs up and turns to you.'
-								*nl
-								'"Last night, while excavating for the foundations, the workers stumbled upon something; one of the excavators dug into a hollow space of some sort. Luckily Igor was on site and he halted the excavation.'
+								'"Yes, I understand... yes. I''ll send Mikhail over ASAP, he''ll represent me... Yes... Tell your men to work on some other parts of the project in the meantime. Have Igor guard the pit and let no one make any fuss, and make sure nobody gets wind of this and, you know, try to halt the construction... Okay, we''ll keep in touch."'
 								*nl
+								'Roman hangs up and turns to you. "Last night, while excavating for the foundations, the workers stumbled upon something; one of the excavators dug into a hollow space of some sort. Luckily, Igor was on site and halted the excavation.'
 								'"It''s not clear what exactly it is, yet. Maybe an abandoned bunker or a cave. But in any case, if there are any more chambers under the foundation, we might not be able to build on the land. So what I want you to do, is to go to the construction site, figure out exactly what the problem is and solve this whole mess as quickly as possible."'
 								act 'Remind him of the correct procedures':
 									*clr & cla
 									'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/system/1_openings/shared/npc_roman.jpg"></center>'
-									'"Firstly we need to talk to..." you start to say, but are quickly interrupted by your boss.'
-									*nl
-									'"Mikhail, do you realize what''s at stake here? We''re near the end of our credit line, we still have unfinalized agreements on the project''s contract, and we already have guys digging the pit. If there is a too big hole under the foundation, and we can''t build on the site, that could bankrupt the company. So this mysterious structure must be addressed immediately and I have to hold the fort here and keep a lid on things."'
+									'"Firstly we need to talk to..." you start to say, but are quickly interrupted.'
+									'"Mikhail, do you realize what''s at stake here? We''re near the end of our credit line, we still have unfinalized agreements on the project''s contract, and we already have guys digging the pit. If there''s a huge hole under the foundation and we can''t build on the site, that could bankrupt the company. So this mysterious structure must be addressed immediately and I have to hold the fort here and keep a lid on things."'
 									act 'Doesn''t look like you have a choice': gt 'intro_city_tg', 'roadPRE'
 								end
 							end
@@ -77,82 +72,62 @@ if $ARGS[0] = 'roadPRE':
 	music_loop = 0
 	CLOSE ALL
 	'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/system/1_openings/1_tf/4.jpg"></center>'
-	'You leave the office and from your car phone your wife Luda. You explain the situation to her and as soon as you finish the call, you drive off to the construction site.'
+	'You leave the office and phone Luda in your car. You explain the situation to her and drive off to the construction site.'
 	act 'Drive':
 		*clr & cla
 		'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/system/1_openings/shared/site_working.jpg"></center>'
-		'You''ve been on the highway for hours before you arrive at the town near the site, leaving you feeling tired. But before you can check into a hotel and get some sleep, you need to get an understanding of the magnitude of the problem you''re dealing with. You follow the directions to the site. Igor calls on the way and tells you that you won''t have to go through a security check.'
-		*nl
-		'You arrive and park your car at the site. You see Igor waving at you from a distance and you walk up to him.'
+		'You''re on the highway for hours before you arrive at the town near the site, leaving you feeling tired. Before you can check into a hotel and get some sleep, you need to get an understanding of the magnitude of the problem you''re dealing with. You follow the directions to the site, Igor calling on the way and telling you that you won''t have to go through a security check.'
+		'You arrive and park your car at the site. You see Igor waving at you from a distance and walk up to him.'
 		act 'Greet Igor':
 			*clr & cla
 			'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/system/1_openings/shared/npc_igor.jpg"></center>'
-			'Igor greets you. He is obviously concerned about the situation and without delay leads you to the pit''s fenced-off entrance. It rained earlier so the ground is all muddy, you''re going to have to clean your shoes when you get back to the hotel.'
-			*nl
+			'Igor greets you. He''s obviously concerned about the situation and leads you to the pit''s fenced-off entrance without delay. It rained earlier, so the ground is soft and muddy.'
 			'"The ladder''s over there," Igor informs you, while pointing to your left.'
-			*nl
 			'You reach the hole in the ground and peek inside using the small flashlight from your keychain. "There seems to be a floor about 5 meters down."'
-			*nl
-			'"Well, what do you think Mikhail? Shall we go down?" Igor says with a faint glimmer of adventure in his eyes.'
+			'"Well, what do you think Mikhail? Shall we go down?" Igor asks with a faint glimmer of adventure in his eyes.'
 			act 'Descend':
 				*clr & cla
 				'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/system/1_openings/shared/site_cave_1.jpg"></center>'
-				'Igor hands you a powerful flashlight and tells the guard to get the ladder over here. Igor is the first one to go down, once he reaches the bottom, he holds the ladder so you can safely climb down as well.'
-				*nl
-				'The cave smells musty and looks all gloomy, but you can breathe freely and the light from your flashlight illuminates the walls. You shoot a beam of light into the corridor and in the distance see something that resembles a door.'
-				*nl
-				'"Damn. If any historians hear about this, they''ll be all over this construction site." Igor mutters.'
-				*nl
+				'Igor hands you a powerful flashlight and tells the guard bring a ladder over. Igor heads down first and you quickly follow him.'
+				'The cave smells musty and looks gloomy, but you can breathe freely and the light from your flashlight illuminates the walls. You shoot a beam of light into the corridor and see something that resembles a door in the distance.'
+				'"Damn. If any historians hear about this, they''ll be all over this place!" Igor mutters.'
 				'You walk up to the door and see drawings on it. Most of them resemble people, but with other stick figures as well.'
 				act 'Open the door':
 					*clr & cla
 					'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/system/1_openings/shared/site_cave_3.jpg"></center>'
-					'You lean against the door, it''s stiff but you manage to push it open.'
-					*nl
-					'"Oh shit...! Take a look over there. Human bones." Igor says nervously.'
-					*nl
+					'You lean against the door. It''s stiff, but you manage to push it open.'
+					'"Oh shit! Take a look over there!" Igor exclaims nervously.'
 					'You take a look at what Igor is pointing at and see a pile of human bones with a skull on top.'
-					*nl
-					'"A tomb, I suppose." Igor mutters looking apprehensive.'
-					*nl
-					'"Probably", you nod. "We can''t rule anything out just yet."'
+					'"A tomb, I suppose..." he mutters while looking apprehensive.'
+					'"Probably," you nod. "We can''t rule anything out just yet."'
 					act 'Go further':
 						*clr & cla
 						'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/system/1_openings/shared/site_cave_5.jpg"></center>'
-						'Further into the cave, you reach a room that resembles some kind of archive, filled with dozens of old, dusty scrolls inside of racks built into the walls.'
-						*nl
-						'Igor takes one of the scrolls and carefully unrolls it. "What the hell? Look at this, it must be some kind of ancient language," Igor says. "I''ll take one with me, and see what I can find out about these, maybe I can get it deciphered. So we''ll know what we are dealing with."'
-						*nl
-						'Looking around, you notice another door on the other side of the chamber, you walk over and open it.'
+						'Further into the cave, you reach a room that resembles some kind of archive, filled with dozens of old, dusty scrolls inside racks built into the walls.'
+						'Igor takes one of the scrolls and carefully unrolls it. "What the hell? Look at this, it must be some kind of ancient language," he says. "I''ll take one with me and see what I can find out about these. Maybe I can get it deciphered so we know what we''re dealing with."'
+						'Looking around, you notice another door on the other side of the chamber and walk over and open it.'
 						act 'Enter the room':
 							*clr & cla
 							'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/system/1_openings/shared/site_cave_altar.jpg"></center>'
-							'There''s an altar in the center of the room, on it there are various pots, several gold amulets and even some stone figures. You continue looking around the room curiously, trying to figure out what it''s purpose was.'
-							*nl
-							'Looking closely at the altar, you notice a strange little amulet placed at the very top.'
+							'There''s an altar in the center of the room with pots, several gold amulets and even stone figures scattered around it. You continue looking around the room curiously, trying to figure out what it''s purpose was.'
+							'Looking closely at the altar, you notice a strange little amulet placed at the top.'
 							act 'Examine the amulet':
 								*clr & cla
 								'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/system/1_openings/shared/item_amulet.jpg"></center>'
-								'You pick up the strange amulet and examine it. <i>This is clearly very old</i>, you think to yourself.'
-								*nl
-								'While holding the amulet, you realize that it''s getting warm, almost hot. Suddenly you feel heat coursing through your entire body. You feel a surge of strength inside you. It''s like you just finished a long jog, but without the fatigue.'
-								*nl
-								'Igor enters the room with one of the scrolls in his hands. "Huh. Interesting little room.", he says, glancing over the altar. "Well, we have to make a decision: either we fill the catacombs up to the brink with cement or we let someone into these rooms. Who knows what all this stuff is, maybe it''s worth more than it looks."'
+								'You pick up the strange amulet and examine it. <i>This is clearly very old</i> you think to yourself.'
+								'While holding the amulet, you realize that it''s getting warm, almost hot, before you feel heat coursing through your entire body and feel a surge of strength inside you. It''s like you just finished a long jog, but without the fatigue.'
+								'Igor enters the room with one of the scrolls in his hands. "Huh. Interesting little room," he observes while glancing over the altar. "Well, we have to make a decision: either we fill these catacombs up with cement or we let someone in to study them. Who knows what all this stuff is. Maybe it''s worth more than it looks?"'
 								act 'Consult you boss':
 									*clr & cla
 									'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/system/1_openings/shared/site_cave_altar.jpg"></center>'
-									'"I''ve got to think about it and consult the director before we do anything." You reply and without thinking about it, you put the small amulet into your pocket.'
-									*nl
-									'"Well, one thing''s for sure, you won''t get reception down here. Let''s go outside." Igor tells you.'
+									'"I''ve got to think about it and consult the director before we do anything," you reply and, without thinking about it, stuff the small amulet in your pocket.'
+									'"Well, one thing''s for sure. You won''t get reception down here. Let''s head outside," Igor replies while motioning for you to leave.'
 									act 'Go back to the surface':
 										*clr & cla
 										'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/system/1_openings/shared/site_working.jpg"></center>'
-										'You walk together with Igor out of the strange chambers and up the ladder, back to the surface.'
-										*nl
-										'"We must have been down there longer than I thought, it''s already late. There will only be security on site now so there''s nothing we can do here until the morning, you should go to the hotel." Igor says.'
-										*nl
-										'With a hasty goodbye to Igor, you make your way back to your car.'
-										'<i>Damn</i>, you think, <i>tomorrow''s going to be a stressful day.</i>'
+										'You walk out of the strange chambers and climb back up the ladder to the surface.'
+										'"We must have been down there longer than I thought, it''s already late. There will only be security on site now, so there''s nothing we can do here until morning. You should go to the hotel." Igor informs you.'
+										'With a hasty goodbye, you make your way back to your car. <i>Damn!</i> you think. <i>Tomorrow''s going to be a stressful day.</i>'
 										act 'Go to the hotel': gt 'intro_city_tg', 'otelPRE'
 									end
 								end
@@ -168,83 +143,64 @@ end
 if $ARGS[0] = 'otelPRE':
 	'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/system/1_openings/1_tf/6.jpg"></center>'
 	'Your trip to the hotel is quite uneventful compared to your tomb raiding adventure.'
-	*nl
-	'You park your car and go to the receptionist to get a room. There are only double rooms available, but it''s going on the company card, so that just means you''ll get a bigger room. You swipe your company card and take your room key.'
+	'You park your car and go to the receptionist to get a room. There are only double rooms available, but it''s going on the company card, so that just means you''ll get a bigger room. You swipe the card and take your room key.'
 	act 'Head upstairs to your room':
 		*clr & cla
 		'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/system/1_openings/1_tf/7.jpg"></center>'
-		'Lying down on one of the beds, you start to wonder just who built that crypt and what it''s purpose was. Your thoughts drift to that amulet you found. The way that thing you touched half an hour ago is still making you feel wonderful baffles you.'
+		'Lying down on one of the beds, you start to wonder just who built that crypt and what it''s purpose was as your thoughts drift to the amulet you found. The way that thing is still making you feel wonderful baffles you.'
 		act 'Call the director':
 			*clr & cla
 			'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/system/1_openings/1_tf/7.jpg"></center>'
-			'You dial Romans'' number and after a few rings, he picks up. You report to him the details of what you found at the site with Igor: an ancient tomb, human bones, scrolls in a mysterious language and the altar in that room.'
-			*nl
-			'The director stays silent while you give your report. A few moments later, he decides that it would be best to stop the construction. He tells you to stay and keep watch over the site until further notice.'
-			*nl
-			'You put the phone away. <i>Looks like this trip is going to last longer than expected</i>, you think to yourself.'
+			'You dial Roman''s number and after a few rings, he picks up. You inform him of what you found at the site: an ancient tomb, human bones, scrolls in a mysterious language and a strange altar.'
+			'Roman stays silent while you give your report. He decides that it would be best to stop the construction and tells you to stay and keep watch over the site until further notice.'
+			'You put the phone down. <i>Looks like this trip is going to last longer than expected,</i> you think to yourself.'
 			act 'Go to bed':
 				*clr & cla
 				'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/system/1_openings/1_tf/7.jpg"></center>'
 				'It doesn''t take you long to drift off to sleep'
 				*nl
-				'Images begin to form in your mind and you soon find yourself in a middle of a dream. The amulet stands before you and out of it comes a ghost of some sort. Before you even realize what you are doing, you find yourself staring deep into the ghost''s eyes which then turn into two planet earths.'
-				*nl
+				'Images begin to form in your mind and you soon find yourself in a middle of a dream. The amulet stands before you and out of it comes a ghost of some sort. Before you even realize what you are doing, you find yourself staring deep into the ghost''s eyes, which turn into two Earths.'
 				'"Looking at the world most just see the mundane, but there is more to it, much more and now you see that too. You have the potential to shape it all, but first, you have company."'
 				*nl
-				'Suddenly your senses return and you are aware of the hotel room around you, you can tell you are not alone.'
+				'You suddenly return to your senses and become aware of not only the room around you, but that you''re not alone.'
 				act 'Open your eyes':
 					*clr & cla
 					'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/system/1_openings/shared/npc_reinhold.jpg"></center>'
-					'As you open your eyes, you see a man standing in your room. He is wearing a long black coat and his face looks weary; he is unshaven and reminds you of most police detectives in Hollywood films.'
-					*nl
-					'"Where is the amulet?" he approaches you.'
+					'As you open your eyes, you see a man standing in your room. He is wearing a long black coat and his face looks weary; he is unshaven and reminds you of scruffy Hollywood police detectives.'
+					'"Where is the amulet?" he asks as he approaches you.'
 					act 'Ask who he is':
 						*clr & cla
 						'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/system/1_openings/shared/npc_reinhold.jpg"></center>'
-						'"Who are you?" you ask puzzledly. The man''s sudden appearance and a sense you never knew you had tell you something about him, that he is not of the world you know.'
-						*nl
-						'"Listen, don''t cause any problems now. Give me the amulet, close the construction site, and all will be fine. After all that place belongs to us," he says in a firm voice.'
-						*nl
+						'"Who are you?" you ask, puzzled. The man''s sudden appearance and a sense you never knew you had tells you something about him; that he is not of this world.'
+						'"Don''t cause any problems now. Give me the amulet, close the construction site and all will be fine. After all, that place belongs to us," he says in a firm voice.'
 						'<i>Belongs to us?</i> His response leaves you bewildered, wondering who he is and what this is all about.'
-						*nl
-						'"Well, how about I give you a small taste of my power." the man says, and out of nowhere comes a burning desire to give him the amulet.'
+						'"Well, how about I give you a small taste of my power?" the man asks, and out of nowhere comes a burning desire to give him the amulet.'
 						act 'Give him the amulet':
 							*clr & cla
 							'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/system/1_openings/1_tf/7.jpg"></center>'
-							'You get out of the bed and give him the stone figure you had put in your pocket earlier. The man takes it, steps back, and without warning, something in his eyes begins to spin like a whirlwind, causing your own eyes to blur as if he was hypnotizing you. A few seconds later your vision clears with the man having somehow disappeared into thin air.'
-							*nl
-							'You rub your eyes, "What the hell is going on here? Was that a dream?. No, it can''t be. I wouldn''t walk around in a dream. I think." You say to no one in particular then check your pocket, the amulet is indeed gone. You sit down on the bed trying to make sense of what just happened.'
-							*nl
+							'You get out of the bed and give him the stone figure you had put in your pocket earlier. The man takes it, steps back, and without warning, something in his eyes begins to spin like a whirlwind, causing your own eyes to blur as if he was hypnotizing you. A few seconds later, your vision clears with the man having somehow disappeared into thin air.'
+							'You rub your eyes. "What the hell is going on here? Was that a dream? No, it can''t be. I wouldn''t walk around in a dream. I think," you say to yourself before checking your pocket. The amulet is indeed gone. You sit down on the bed, trying to make sense of what just happened.'
 							'While lost in thought, you hear a knock on the door. You get up to open the door, not even thinking why you would have visitors this late at night.'
-							'"...Who''s there?", you ask, still confused.'
 							*nl
-							'A woman''s voice responds that she''s the hotel receptionist and that she needs to talk to you on an urgent matter.'
+							'"...Who''s there?" you ask, still confused.'
+							'A woman''s voice responds that she''s the hotel receptionist and that she needs to talk to you about an urgent matter.'
 							act 'Answer the door':
 								*clr & cla
 								'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/system/1_openings/shared/npc_tatiana.jpg"></center>'
 								'You open the door, but don''t recall the woman in front of you being at the reception desk; the woman from earlier didn''t have red hair and glasses. After entering the room she quickly examines the place, before locking her eyes on you.'
-								*nl
-								'"Mikhail, right?" You nod.'
-								*nl
-								'"Last night you went to a certain place and took out something very valuable and powerful." the woman speaks to you.'
+								'"Mikhail, right?" she asks and you nod.'
+								'"You went to a certain place last night and took something very valuable, and very powerful..." she continues.'
 								act 'Another one?':
 									*clr & cla
 									'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/system/1_openings/shared/npc_tatiana.jpg"></center>'
-									'<i>Again?</i>'
-									*nl
-									'You sigh, irritated that not only have you been disturbed in the middle of the night, but these idiots apparently cannot even agree among themselves which one of them should disturb you.'
-									*nl
+									'You sigh, irritated that not only have you been disturbed in the middle of the night, but these idiots apparently can''t even agree amongst themselves which one should be disturbing you.'
 									'"Listen, you''re starting to bother me. That other guy already showed up asking for the damn amulet."'
-									*nl
 									'She looks at you with surprise. "What? Someone already came here? Who was it?"'
 									act 'Tell her':
 										*clr & cla
 										'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/system/1_openings/shared/npc_tatiana.jpg"></center>'
-										'"It was some man in a navy cloak with ginger hair and a light beard, he didn''t tell me his name. He already took the amulet." You answer.'
-										*nl
-										'The girl''s face drops. "Damn it!" She looks into your eyes. "Okay... Mikhail, we have to go somewhere else, there are too many people that might get hurt here. Gustav, come here!" The girl calls out to the corridor.'
-										*nl
-										'A tall man enters the room'
+										'"It was some guy in a navy cloak with ginger hair and a light beard. He didn''t tell me his name. He already took the amulet."'
+										'The girl''s face drops. "Damn it!" She looks into your eyes. "Okay... Mikhail, we have to go somewhere else. There are too many people that might get hurt here. Gustav, come here!" The girl calls out to the corridor and a tall man enters the room.'
 										MagikDostup = 0
 										$pcs_firstname = 'Mikhail'
 										$pcs_lastname = 'Ivanov'
@@ -281,7 +237,7 @@ if $ARGS[0] = 'otelPRE':
 										act 'Prepare to fight':
 											*clr & cla
 											'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/system/1_openings/shared/npc_gustav.jpg"></center>'
-											'The man has a large tattoo across the left side of his face. He too has red hair'
+											'The man has a large tattoo across the left side of his face. He too has red hair.'
 											$boy = 'Gustav'
 											gs 'fight','initFight',1
 
@@ -306,92 +262,66 @@ if $ARGS[0] = 'tatianaPRE':
 	$pcs_lastname = '<<$temp_lastname>>'
 	'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/system/1_openings/shared/npc_tatiana.jpg"></center>'
 	'You wake up in an unfamiliar room. Standing near you is the same red-haired girl that entered your hotel room.'
-	*nl
-	'"Ah, you''re awake," she chirps. "I told this jerk Gustav that he should have treated you more carefully, but he''s bad at listening. As a result I had to use some magic to stabilize you, he almost knocked you out permanently."'
-	*nl
-	'"While you were unconscious I did some research on you. Turns out the Amulet of Power passed to you. Must have happened when you touched it. Unfortunately, Reinhold, the guy in your room, he''s probably realized by now that the amulet no longer has the power and now he''s out to hunt you down."'
+	'"Ah, you''re awake," she chirps. "I told this jerk Gustav that he should have treated you more carefully, but he''s bad at listening. As a result, I had to use some magic to stabilize you. He almost knocked you out permanently."'
+	'"While you were unconscious, I did some research on you. Turns out the Amulet of Power passed to you. Must have happened when you touched it. Unfortunately, Reinhold, the guy in your room, he''s probably realized by now that the amulet no longer has the power and now he''s out to hunt you down."'
 	act 'What''s going on?':
 		*clr & cla
 		'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/system/1_openings/shared/npc_tatiana.jpg"></center>'
 		'"What the hell is going on?" you respond. You try to move your hands, but you''re tied to the bed.'
+		'"I''ll start from the beginning," the girl says. "Magic exists and is real. Millenia ago, the world was not the same. The fae creatures who possess natural magic lived in balance, but the succubus were free to breed with whomever they wished."'
+		'"They bred with humans, and with that human magicians were born. The Sidhe, as the most powerful of the fae, feared the increasing number of human magicians and cast a very powerful spell to bind the succubus to them. This prevented either from being able to reproduce without the other."'
+		'"All magicians have some of that original fae blood in there bodies and it is through that that they are able to connect with the world of magic." The redhead adjusts her glasses. "Most of the world simply ignores magic or are protected from it by magic''s natural desire to remain hidden."'
+		'"But last night, there was a powerful burst of magical energy, strong enough to be clearly seen by any with magical connections. Can you guess where this surge came from? Yeah, that cave you found. Apparently the surge occurred when you opened the seal to the archive. Anyway, that was when we started to search. That source of power is desired by many, but it is extremely dangerous and in the wrong hands could do untold horrors."'
 		*nl
-		'"Um, okay, I''ll start from the beginning," the girl says. "Magic exists and is real. Ages ago the world was not the same, the fae creatures who possess natural magic lived in balance but the succubus were free to breed with whom ever they wished."'
-		*nl
-		'"They breed with humans with that human magicians were born. The Sidhe as the most powerful of the fae feared the increasing numbers of human magicians and cast a very powerful spell to bind the succubus to them, this prevented either from being able to reproduce without the other."'
-		*nl
-		'"All magicians have some of that original fae blood in there bodies and it is through that that they are able to connect with the world of magic."'
-		*nl
-		'The redhead adjusts her glasses. "Most of the world simply ignore magic or are protected from it by magic''s natural desire to remain hidden."'
-		*nl
-		'"But last night there was a powerful burst of magical energy, strong enough to be clearly seen by any with magical connections. Can you guess where this surge came from? Yeah, that cave you found. Apparently the surge occurred when you opened the seal to the archive. Anyway, that was when we started to search, that source of power is desired by many, but it is extremely dangerous and in the wrong hands could do untold horrors."'
-		*nl
-		'She stops for a few seconds for you process that information. It seems really far fetched.'
-		*nl
+		'She stops for a few seconds for you process the information. It seems really far fetched.'
 		'"As you can figure out, Reinhold wanted to prevent the amulet being misused, but he was not very thorough and didn''t check you over."'
 		act 'So, the whole world is just an illusion?':
 			*clr & cla
 			'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/system/1_openings/shared/npc_tatiana.jpg"></center>'
-			'"So magic exists and is used by all these people and creatures, but the rest of us just don''t see it, or convince ourselves it didn''t happen?" You ask.'
-			*nl
-			'The girl nods. "Yes. You''re a quick study. Machines, apartments, television and the Internet, all this really does exist and is in the form in which people see it. But if I say, hurl a fireball, then people might see that I threw a grenade or shot from a flamethrower. The human mind can''t process magic, so it blocks it as a way to protect the person from going crazy."'
-			*nl
-			'"Hence such things as little green men, UFOs, poltergeists, spontaneous combustion, are when people encounter a difficult to hide phenomenon and the conclusion is flawed. In some cases, if someone''s mind can not cope with the spell they witness, they can be driven crazy and then no one believes them."'
+			'"So magic exists and is used by all these people and creatures, but the rest of us just don''t see it, or convince ourselves it didn''t happen?"'
+			'The girl nods. "Yes. You''re a quick study. Machines, apartments, television and the Internet. All this really does exist and is in the form in which people see it. But if I say, hurl a fireball, then people might see that I threw a grenade or shot from a flamethrower. The human mind can''t process magic, so it blocks it as a way to protect the person from going crazy."'
+			'"Hence such things as little green men, UFOs, poltergeists and spontaneous combustion are when people encounter a difficult to hide phenomenon and the conclusion is flawed. In some cases, if someone''s mind can''t cope with the spell they witness, they can be driven insane."'
 			act 'And who are you?':
 				*clr & cla
 				'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/system/1_openings/shared/npc_tatiana.jpg"></center>'
 				'"And who are you?" you ask.'
-				*nl
-				'The girl smiled. "Me? I''m Tatiana, a young mage with an keen interest in magical phenomenon. I specialize in the treatment of mutations, and magic relating to the body. I have little combat skill, so I rely on the services of Gustav to provide some muscle. He''s a Mutant, his mutation is due to magical exposure and it gives him unmatched physical strength and he is a great tracker."'
-				*nl
+				'The girl smiles. "Me? I''m Tatiana, a young mage with a keen interest in magical phenomenon. I specialize in the treatment of mutations, and magic relating to the body. I have little combat skill, so I rely on the services of Gustav to provide some muscle. He''s a Mutant due to magical exposure. It gives him unmatched physical strength and he is a great tracker."'
 				'"The two of us run a detective agency for cover and money, but our real objective is studying magic and its effects."'
-				act 'What do you want form me?':
+				act 'What do you want from me?':
 					*clr & cla
 					'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/system/1_openings/shared/npc_tatiana.jpg"></center>'
-					'"What do you want form me?" you ask.'
-					*nl
-					'"Hmm, well... the amulet obviously," Tatiana replies. "When I looked for you, I was hoping to get that object of power to study but Reinhold got to you first. The amulet will now be pretty much useless anyway, as its power passed on to you."'
-					*nl
-					'"But this is not good for you. You may think that since you have the amulets'' power, you can do anything. But in reality, you''re helpless without the skill to use it. Reinhold easily overpowered your will and forced you to obey, and Gustav beat you like a puppy."'
-					act 'What is this amulet? Where did it come from?':
+					'"What do you want from me?" you ask.'
+					'"Well, the amulet obviously," Tatiana replies. "When I looked for you, I was hoping to get that object of power to study, but Reinhold got to you first. The amulet will now be pretty much useless anyway, as its power passed on to you."'
+					'"But this is not good for you. You may think that since you have the amulet''s power, you can do anything. But in reality, you''re helpless without the skill to use it. Reinhold easily overpowered your will and forced you to obey, and Gustav beat you like a puppy."'
+					act 'What is this amulet?':
 						*clr & cla
 						'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/system/1_openings/shared/npc_tatiana.jpg"></center>'
 						'"And what is this amulet? Where did it come from?" you ask.'
-						'Tatiana thinks about it for a few moments. "It was made by the trickster Rikudo, one of the most powerful ancient magicians before he died, he taunted the only living mage who could control its immense power by cursing him to be stuck in a female form and making it only activate for a male mage."'
+						'Tatiana thinks about it for a few seconds. "It was made by the trickster Rikudo, one of the most powerful ancient magicians before he died, he taunted the only living mage who could control its immense power by cursing him to be stuck in a female form and making it only activate for a male mage."'
+						'"Great. So I''ve been thrown into this mess by the dead owner of that ancient tomb. Hang on! I''m not a mage, so how could the power be transferred to me?"'
 						*nl
-						'"Great. So I''ve been thrown into this mess by the dead owner of that ancient tomb. Hang on I''m not a mage, how could the power be transferred to me?"'
-						*nl
-						'"It seems that its long time underground has caused it to malfunction and its power has entered your body. The bad news is it is far too powerful and will kill you." At this you are filled with fear and start to struggle against your bindings.'
-						*nl
-						'"You are lucky Reinhold didn''t realize this, he would have stopped you from accidentally wielding the power and killing yourself and who knows how many others by killing you in that hotel room. I have another way to save you, but you''re not going to like it."'
-						*nl
-						'You don''t say anything, so she continues, "I can feel the aura of power emanating from you, by drawing from that I can perform a powerful magic spell that will transform you into someone who is protected from the masculine alignment of the power."'
-						act 'Uh, I do not understand, what are you suggesting?':
+						'"It seems that its long time underground caused it to malfunction and its power has entered your body. The bad news is it is far too powerful and will kill you." Her words fill you with fear and you start to struggle against your bindings.'
+						'"You''re lucky Reinhold didn''t realize this. He would have stopped you from accidentally wielding the power and killing yourself and who knows how many others by killing you in that hotel room. I have another way to save you, but you''re not going to like it."'
+						'You don''t say anything, so she continues. "I can feel the aura of power emanating from you. By drawing from that, I can perform a powerful magic spell that will transform you into someone who is protected from the masculine alignment of the power."'
+						act 'I don''t understand':
 							*clr & cla
 							'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/system/1_openings/shared/npc_tatiana.jpg"></center>'
-							'"Uh, I do not understand, what are you suggesting?" you ask her.'
-							*nl
-							'Tatiana runs a hand through her hair and giggles. "I''ll make you a pretty, young girl and the power will lie dormant saving you from blowing up a city or something."'
+							'"Uh, I do not understand. What are you suggesting?"'
+							'Tatiana runs a hand through her hair and giggles. "I''ll make you a pretty, young girl and the power will lie dormant, saving you from blowing up a city or something."'
 							*nl
-							'Your eyes widen in shock.'
-							*nl
-							'"Well, there is another way, I can just stop your heart and let your power dissolve into nature, but you will die. I''m not Reinhold, I can take this risk and I don''t want to kill you. Maybe with more time doing research I can work out another solution, but I cannot leave you like this."'
+							'Your eyes widen in shock. "Well, there is another way. I can just stop your heart and let your power dissolve into nature, but you will die. I''m not Reinhold, I can take this risk and I don''t want to kill you. Maybe with more time doing research, I can work out another solution, but I can''t leave you like this."'
 							act 'What about your family?':
 								*clr & cla
 								'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/system/1_openings/shared/npc_tatiana.jpg"></center>'
-								'"Hey, I do not want to be a woman. I have a family, a wife, a daughter", you tell her, afraid.'
-								*nl
-								'Tatiana smiles. "Well the choice is simple, either you die or live without a penis for the time being."'
-								*nl
-								'"As for your family, not to worry. I''ll arrange everything. We will fabricate your death to get Reinhold off your back. To make your transition easier I''ll cover your memory of the family, they will only be ghostly memories, you won''t even remember where you lived. Don''t worry, I won''t erase your entire memory and leave you a useless vegetable."'
+								'"Hey, I don''t want to be a woman. I have a family! A wife and daughter!" you protest.'
+								'Tatiana smiles. "Well the choice is simple. You either die or live without a penis for the time being. As for your family, not to worry. I''ll arrange everything. We''ll fabricate your death to get Reinhold off your back. To make your transition easier, I''ll cover your memory of your family. They will only be ghostly memories, you won''t even remember where you lived. Don''t worry, I won''t erase your entire memory and leave you a useless vegetable."'
 								act 'There must be another way!':
 									$loc = 'intro_city_tg'
 									$loc_arg = 'custom'
 									*clr & cla
 									'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/system/1_openings/shared/npc_tatiana.jpg"></center>'
-									'"There must be another way!" you panic. You tug at the restraints on the bed.'
-									*nl
-									'Tatiana''s face becomes serious. "Do not argue. It is the only way available to me. You will need a to use a new name, think it over in your dreams and tell me when you wake up, otherwise I will give you a pretty name. Now go to sleep." Says Tatiana as she puts her hand on your chest. Your vision immediately fades and you dream about a girl you never knew and what she did at school...'
-									
+									'"There must be another way!" you panic while tugging at the restraints on the bed.'
+									'Tatiana''s face turns serious. "Do not argue. It''s the only way available to me. You''ll need to use a new name, so think it over in your dreams and tell me when you wake up, otherwise I''ll give you a pretty name. Now go to sleep." She puts her hand on your chest and your vision immediately fades. You dream about a girl you never knew and what she did at school...'
 									act 'Dream': gt 'intro_city_select', 'start'
 								end
 							end
@@ -409,7 +339,7 @@ if $ARGS[0] = 'custom':
 !!	This is to bypass the next part if the avatar system was used
 !!	It will be changed to bypass the head options, once more body options are added
 
-!!	Just hair and eye color here for now; the dialog will be update as more options are added
+!!	Just hair and eye color here for now; the dialog will be updated as more options are added
 	'<center><b><font color = maroon>CHARACTER CUSTOMIZATION</font></b></center>'
 	'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/system/1_openings/shared/character_creation_2.jpg"></center>'
 	'As you drift in unconsciousness, an impression of a woman forms in your mind. Many aspects of her appearance are indistinct, but there are some things you can make out.'
@@ -426,52 +356,45 @@ end
 if $ARGS[0] = 'sleepPRE':
 	killobj
 	'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/system/1_openings/shared/npc_tatiana.jpg"></center>'
-	'"You''re awake?." Tatiana says looking into your eyes.'
+	'"You''re awake?" Tatiana asks while looking into your eyes.'
 	act 'Look at yourself':
 		cla
 		*clr
 		clr
 		'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/system/1_openings/1_tf/8.jpg"></center>'
 		'"Fuck," you say and immediately shut your mouth again. Your voice... it''s so feminine. Tatiana giggles.'
+		'"This is the first time I''ve changed someone''s gender, therefore I just <i>had</i> to see your reaction. Totally worth it. But you turned out beautiful. For a first try anyway. I miscalculated something. Due to the sharp hormonal change, you have bad acme on your face and I failed to change your eyes and lips. On the bright side, your body will change much faster than one of a natural born woman. That means it will be easier to gain and lose weight and change facial features. All in all, you turned quite well."' 
+		'"By the way, your new ''equipment'' down there is fully functional, so if you don''t want to be a mother, you should think about using contraceptives."'
 		*nl
-		'"This is the first time I changed the gender of a person, therefore I just HAD to see your reaction. Totally worth it. But you turned out beautiful. For a first try that is of course. I miscalculated something, for example due to sharp hormonal change you have bad acme on your face and I failed to change your eyes and lips. On the bright side, your body will change much faster than one of a natural born woman. That means it will be easier to gain and lose weight and change facial features. All in all you turned quite well. By the way, your new ''equipment'' down there is fully functional, so if you don''t want to be a mother, you should think about using contraceptives."'
-		*nl
-		'You angrily look at Tatiana, "So you think I''m a complete woman? On the outside I''ll look like one, but guess what, I''m still the 34-years-old me."'
-		*nl
-		'"Well, yes. I won''t argue about that." Tatiana agrees. "It''s your life and you decide what you do with it, but for the time being, you cannot go back to your old life, so deal with it. On a side note, I already took care of an alibi. Today Mikhail crashed his car into the pit and died, it''s on the news." With these words, Tatiana picked up the remote and turned on the TV.'
+		'You angrily glare at Tatiana. "So that makes me a woman now? On the outside maybe, but guess what? I''m still a 34 year old man on the inside!"'
+		'"Well, yes. I won''t argue about that." Tatiana agrees. "It''s your life and you decide what you do with it, but for the time being, you can''t go back to your old life, so deal with it. On a side note, I already took care of an alibi. Mikhail crashed his car into the pit and died, it''s on the news." Tatiana picks up a remote and turns on the TV.'
 
 		act 'Watch TV':
 			cla
 			*clr
 			clr
 			'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/system/1_openings/1_tf/9.jpg"></center>'
-			'On TV there is a news report about a businessman, who drove his car into a hole at a construction site. The man died later in hospital without regaining consciousness.'
-			*nl
-			'You look at Tatiana, with a bewildered look. She has an enigmatic smile, "Well, I''m still a magician and that''s something that I can do. Reinhold has definitely lost the trail. The body that ''died'' behind the wheel of the BMW was a perfect copy of your old self, from your absorbed amulet energy down to the placement of every single hair."'
+			'There is a news report about a businessman who drove his car into a hole at a construction site. He died in hospital without regaining consciousness.'
+			'You look at Tatiana, bewildered. She has an enigmatic smile on her face. "Well, I''m still a magician and that''s something that I can do. Reinhold has definitely lost the trail. The body in that car was a perfect copy of your old self, from your absorbed amulet energy down to the placement of every single hair."'
+			'"Anyways, here are your new legal documents, including a new passport. Starting today, you are <<$pcs_nickname>> <<$pcs_lastname>>, an 18 year old girl who lives in the city. Nobody knows you, but you at least have an apartment to call home. This is a gift to you from Gustav. Here are the keys. Now get up, you''ve got to go to your new home and start a new life."'
 			*nl
-			'"Anyways, here are your new legal documents, including a new passport. Starting today, you are <<$pcs_nickname>> <<$pcs_lastname>>, 18 years old, female and live in the city. Nobody knows you, but you at least have an apartment to call home. This is a gift to you from Gustav. Here are the keys to it. Now get up, you''ve got to go to your new home and start a new life."'
-			*nl
-			'Gustav, the redhead with a tattoo on his face enters the room. He looks at you and says, "I''ll take you."'
+			'Gustav, the redhead with a tattoo on his face, enters the room. He looks at you. "Come on, I''ll take you."'
 			act 'Go with Gustav':
 				cla
 				*clr
 				clr
 				'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/system/1_openings/shared/npc_gustav.jpg"></center>'
-				'Gustav silently takes you to the garage and you enter the black jeep. Gustav gets behind the wheel and drives you into the city. You silently speculate about what to do now.'
-				*nl
-				'After a few minutes, while keeping his eyes on the road, Gustav speaks. "I''m sorry I beat you up. I have trouble controlling myself during a fight. You had a large build and for a second I thought you might be dangerous for me, so I ended up hitting you with my full force."'
-				*nl
-				'You look at him. "Forget it. Listen Gustav... what do I do now?"'
-				*nl
-				'Gustav nods and says, "Well, I would advise you to start by buying food, all sorts of washing powders, laundry detergents and dishes. There are very few supplies already in the apartment, but they''ll only last you a day or two. There''s no TV either. Then get a job. Not far from your new home is a small café, if I remember correctly there was a vacant waitress position not too long ago. You should talk to the owner of the café about the job. Don''t forget to monitor your health, keep your mood up and have a clear mind."'
-				*nl
-				'"Now your mind is very weak, if you don''t take care of yourself you will go crazy. You need to eat well, sleep regularly, have fun, do not generally become depressive or else you end up in a madhouse. Don''t go looking for Tatiana, you will not find her anyway, and secondly, if we need to contact you, we will find you."'
+				'Gustav silently takes you to the garage and you enter his black jeep. Gustav gets behind the wheel and drives you into the city. You silently speculate about what to do now.'
+				'After a few minutes, while keeping his eyes on the road, Gustav speaks. "I''m sorry I beat you up. I have trouble controlling myself during a fight. You had a large build and for a second I thought you might be dangerous, so I ended up hitting you with my full force."'
 				*nl
-				'You arrived at some five-story Khrushchev era buildings. Gustav stops the car and points a finger at the entrance. "Your apartment number 69, Tatiana already gave you the key. Now go. Remember don''t just give up, not everyone gets an entirely new chance at life. Tatiana and me will keep an eye out for you."'
+				'You look at him. "Forget it. Listen Gustav... What do I do now?"'
+				'Gustav nods. "Well, I would advise you to start by buying food, all sorts of washing powders, laundry detergent and dishes. There are a few supplies already in the apartment, but they''ll only last you a day or two. There''s no TV either. Then get a job. Not far from your new home is a small café. If I remember correctly, there was a vacant waitress position there not too long ago. You should talk to the owner about the job. Don''t forget to monitor your health, keep your mood up and have a clear mind."'
+				'"Your mind is very weak. If you don''t take care of yourself you will go crazy. You need to eat well, sleep regularly and have fun. Don''t become depressed or else you''ll end up in a madhouse. Don''t go looking for Tatiana; you won''t find her. Secondly, if we need to contact you, we will find you."'
 				*nl
-				'Also, you might want to steer clear of those Gopnik, they might just look like petty criminals having a drink, but they have connections and you''re just a pretty young girl now.'
+				'You arrive at some old Soviet era buildings. Gustav stops the car and points a finger at the entrance. "You''re in apartment 69. Tatiana already gave you the key, so go. Don''t just give up. Not everyone gets an entirely new chance at life. Tatiana and I will keep an eye out for you."'
+				'"Also, you might want to steer clear of those gopniks. They might just look like petty criminals having a drink, but they have connections and you''re just a pretty young girl now.'
 
-				act 'Out of the car':
+				act 'Get out of the car':
 					gs 'intro_initialization_city'
 					cla
 					showstat 1
@@ -480,7 +403,7 @@ if $ARGS[0] = 'sleepPRE':
 					cla
 					*clr
 					'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/system/1_openings/1_tf/start_tf.jpg"></center>'
-					'Welcome to the Transformation start! Although you have lost your masculinity and your old life, but new possibilities are opening up before your eyes, not least aided in your newfound knowledge of the magical nature of the world!'
+					'Welcome to the Transformation start! Although you''ve lost your masculinity and your old life, new possibilities are opening up before your eyes, not least aided in your newfound knowledge of the magical nature of the world!'
 					act 'Begin': gt 'city_residential'
 				end
 			end

+ 14 - 10
locations/intro_sg.qsrc

@@ -1,17 +1,19 @@
 # intro_sg
 
 gs 'themes', 'indoors'
-killvar '$start_type'
-$start_type = 'sg'
-$start_type[1] = 'nomagic'
+if $start_type ! 'sg_m':
+	killvar '$start_type'
+	$start_type = 'sg'
+	$start_type[1] = 'nomagic'
+end
 
 if $ARGS[0] = 'start':
 	menu_off = 1
 	'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/system/1_openings/shared/pre_5.jpg"></center>'
 	'You were born in the small town of Pavlovsk near the city of St Petersburg. You have an older sister, Anya, who is two years older than you.'
-	'Your mother is Natasha. You don''t know much about your biological father... your mother never wants to talk about him, or why he left you and Anya with her.'
+	'Your mother is Natasha. You don''t know much about your biological father; your mother never wants to talk about him, or why he left you and Anya with her.'
 	'Your mother met another man not too long after her and your biological father got divorced, Vladimir. Together they had your little brother Kolka. Even though he''s not your real father, Vladimir has always treated you and Anya as if you were his own children.'
-	act 'Continue': gt 'intro_sg', 'Two'
+	act '<center><b>Continue</b></center>': gt 'intro_sg', 'Two'
 end
 
 if $ARGS[0] = 'Two':
@@ -24,10 +26,8 @@ if $ARGS[0] = 'Three':
 	$loc = 'intro_sg'
 	$loc_arg = 'four'
 	'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/system/1_openings/shared/pre_7.jpg"></center>'
-	'Like it does for most girls, you reached the milestone of puberty when you were 13 years old. You had your first period, which sucked... but that was just the start of your changes.'
-	*nl
-	'Your chest then felt strange and you discovered your breasts were growing! This excited you: how big will they be when you grow up? Hair also began to grow in at your armpits and pubic area, and at the same time you felt things... intimate things. Over time you learned to appreciate these feelings, and how to manage your developing body. Your troublesome skin complexion remains an issue though.'
-	*nl
+	'Like it does for most girls, you reached the milestone of puberty when you were 13 years old. You had your first period, which sucked, but that was just the start of your changes.'
+	'Your chest felt strange and you discovered your breasts were growing! This excited you: how big will they be when you grow up? Hair also began to grow in your armpits and pubic area, and at the same time you felt things... intimate things. Over time you learned to appreciate these feelings, and how to manage your developing body. Your troublesome skin complexion remains an issue though.'
 	'When you finished 9th grade, you decided to continue with your secondary education. You completed the first one, only one more year of school to go, but first: What type of student are you?'
 	act '<center><b>Time to choose</b></center>': gt 'intro_sg_select', 'start'
 end
@@ -44,7 +44,11 @@ if $ARGS[0] = 'four':
 	'<center>Customize your:</center>'
 	'<center><a href="exec:gs ''intro_customization'', ''hair''"><img src="images/system/1_openings/shared/icon_hair.png"></a> <a href="exec:gs ''intro_customization'', ''eyes''"><img src="images/system/1_openings/shared/icon_eye.png"></a></center>'
 
-	act '<center><b>Done</b></center>': gt 'intro_sg', 'five'
+	if $start_type = 'sg_m':
+		act '<center><b>Done</b></center>': gt 'intro_sg_m', 'four'
+	else
+		act '<center><b>Done</b></center>': gt 'intro_sg', 'five'
+	end
 end
 
 if $ARGS[0] = 'five':

+ 44 - 55
locations/intro_sg_m.qsrc

@@ -8,20 +8,21 @@ if $ARGS[0] = 'four':
 	*clr & cla
 	menu_off = 1
 	'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/system/1_openings/shared/site_gadukino.jpg"></center>'
-	'After your second to last year of school you go on summer holiday with your parents to your grandparents farm in the village of Gadukino. There is nothing to do here but watch animals graze and help your grandparents, which does earn you some extra cash but is very tedious.'
+	'After your second to last year of school, you go on summer holiday with your parents to your grandparents farm in the village of Gadukino. There is nothing to do here but watch animals graze and help your grandparents, which does earn you some extra cash, even if it''s very tedious.'
 	act 'Take a walk':
 		*clr & cla
 		'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/system/1_openings/shared/site_woods.jpg"></center>'
-		'You decide to get away from things and have a walk through the forest spending most of the time on your phone'
-		'Your phone signal drops meaning you''ve gone too far from the village, looking up you don''t recognise anything and suddenly realize that you are lost.'
+		'You decide to get away from things and have a walk through the forest, spending most of the time on your phone.'
+		'Your phone signal then drops, meaning you''ve strayed too far from the village. Looking up, you don''t recognise anything and suddenly realize that you are lost.'
 		act 'Find a way back':
 			*clr & cla
 			'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/system/1_openings/shared/site_ruin.jpg"></center>'
-			'You try to find your way back but the only thing you manage to do is get more lost. After hours of wandering around you come across an old ruin.'
+			'You try to find your way back, but the only thing you manage to do is get even more lost. After hours of wandering around, you come across an old ruin.'
 			act 'Take a break':
 				*clr & cla
 				'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/system/1_openings/shared/site_tunnel_1.jpg"></center>'
-				'You sit down on a large stone in the ruins and take a breath. You are starting to get hungry. If it''s not one thing it''s another. You stomp your foot in frustration and the floor gives way. You desperately try to hold on to something but everything in reach comes loose and falls down the hole with you. You feel slightly dazed but after a quick check you seem to be uninjured. You seem to be in an underground chamber of some sort. Looking up you see that climbing out is not an option, there is an old gate here but it''s either locked or rusted shut. Looks like the only way out is the tunnel on the other side of the chamber.'
+				'You sit down on a large stone in the ruins and take a breath. You''re starting to get hungry, and stomp your foot in frustration. The floor suddenly gives way and you desperately try to hold on to something, but everything in reach comes loose and falls down the hole with you. You feel slightly dazed, but after a quick check you seem to be uninjured. You seem to be in an underground chamber of some sort and looking up, you see that climbing out is not an option.' 
+				'You spot an old gate, but it''s either locked or rusted shut. The only way out seems to be the tunnel on the other side of the chamber. You pull out your phone and turn on the flashlight before heading into the tunnel.'
 				act 'Follow the tunnel':
 					*clr & cla
 					'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/system/1_openings/shared/site_tunnel_2.jpg"></center>'
@@ -29,11 +30,12 @@ if $ARGS[0] = 'four':
 					act 'Further':
 						*clr & cla
 						'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/system/1_openings/shared/site_cave_altar.jpg"></center>'
-						'At the end of the tunnel you find a dead end. Or at least it seems so. You can see light coming through the cracks in the wall so you do your best to knock it down. Suddenly the wall crumbles and you find yourself in another chamber filled with old pottery and baubles. Opposite you is another tunnel, hopefully it leads out. In the center of the room is an altar and on it is what seems to be centerpiece of this room, a strange amulet.'
+						'Reaching the end of the tunnel, you find a dead end. Or at least it seems so. You can see light coming through the cracks in the wall, so you do your best to knock it down. The wall crumbles and you find yourself in another chamber filled with old pottery and baubles. Opposite you is another tunnel, which hopefully leads outside. In the center of the room is an altar and on it is what seems to be centerpiece of this room; a strange amulet.'
 						act 'Examine amulet':
 							*clr & cla
 							'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/system/1_openings/shared/item_amulet.jpg"></center>'
-							'You take the amulet in your hands and notice it''s much lighter than it looks and unusually warm for a piece of metal. It''s shaped like an antique oil lamp and... is that a penis? As you are about to pocket it, the amulet grows even hotter and zaps you. Oww. You drop it. Screw this, you are out of here.'
+							'You take the amulet in your hands and notice it''s much lighter than it looks and is unusually warm for a piece of metal. It''s shaped like an antique oil lamp and... is that a penis?' 
+							'As you''re about to pocket it, the amulet grows even hotter and zaps you, forcing you to drop it. You decide that it''s best to try and find a way out.'
 							act 'Find a way out':
 								*clr & cla
 								'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/system/1_openings/shared/site_working.jpg"></center>'
@@ -41,7 +43,7 @@ if $ARGS[0] = 'four':
 								act 'Sneak out':
 									*clr & cla
 									'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/system/1_openings/shared/site_road.jpg"></center>'
-									'The workers shift has long since finished so sneaking out is not too hard. The site is on the highway so hopefully you can make it back before your mother starts freaking out. As you start walking back you feel a sudden rush of heat and find yourself falling...'
+									'The workers shift has long since finished, so sneaking out is not too hard. The site is on the highway so hopefully you can make it back before your mother starts freaking out. As you start walking back, you feel a sudden rush of heat and find yourself falling...'
 									act 'Continue': gt 'intro_sg_m','five'
 								end
 							end
@@ -57,68 +59,65 @@ if $ARGS[0] = 'five':
 	*clr & cla
 	'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/system/1_openings/shared/npc_tatiana.jpg"></center>'
 	'You wake up in an unfamiliar room. Standing near you is a red-haired girl.'
-	'"Ah, you woke up," she chirped. "We found you half-dead, you know. You almost didn''t make it. You shouldn''t be fondling ancient amulets you know nothing about."'
-	'"I did some research on what happened to you. Turns out the Amulet of Power passed to you, which should only happen if touched by a male mage. Unfortunately, I got some bad news for you. Reinhold, who''s a really powerful mage. He''s been tracking down this amulet for a while now and if he realizes that the amulet''s power has passed to you he might think you pose a risk."'
+	'"Ah, you woke up," she chirps. "We found you half-dead, you know. You almost didn''t make it. You shouldn''t be fondling ancient amulets you know nothing about."'
+	'"I did some research on what happened to you. Turns out the Amulet of Power passed to you, which should only happen if touched by a male mage. Unfortunately, I''ve got some bad news for you. Reinhold, a really powerful mage, has been tracking down this amulet for a while now and if he realizes that the amulet''s power has passed to you, he might think you pose a risk."'
 
 	act 'What''s going on?':
 		*clr & cla
 		'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/system/1_openings/shared/npc_tatiana.jpg"></center>'
 		'"What the hell is going on?" you respond. You try to move your hands, but you''re tied to the bed.'
-		'"Um, okay, I''ll start from the beginning," the girl says. "Magic exists and is real. Ages ago the world was not the same, the fae creatures who possess natural magic lived in balance but the succubus were free to breed with whom ever they wished."'
-		'"They bred with humans and so human magicians were born. The Sidhe as the most powerful of the fae feared the increasing numbers of human magicians and cast a very powerful spell to bind the succubus to them, this prevented one from being able to reproduce without the other."'
+		'"I''ll start from the beginning," the girl says. "Magic exists and is real. Milennia ago, the world was not the same. The fae creatures who possess natural magic lived in balance, but the succubus were free to breed with whomever they wished."'
+		'"They bred with humans and so human magicians were born. The Sidhe, as the most powerful of the fae, feared the increasing number of human magicians and cast a very powerful spell to bind the succubus to them. This prevented one from being able to reproduce without the other."'
 		'"All magicians have some of that original fae blood in their bodies and it is through that that they are able to connect with the world of magic."'
 		*nl
-		'The redhead adjusts her glasses. "Most of the world simply ignores magic or are protected from it by magic''s natural desire to remain hidden."'
-		'"But last night there was a powerful burst of magical energy, strong enough to be clearly seen by any with magical connections. Can you guess where this surge came from? Yeah, that cave you found. Apparently the surge occurred when you opened the seal to the archive. Anyway, that was when we started to search, that source of power is desired by many, but it is extremely dangerous and in the wrong hands could do untold horrors."'
-		'She stops for a few seconds for you to process that information. It seems really far fetched.'
-		'"Reinhold wants to prevent the amulet being misused, he is tasked with maintaining order and will search for you."'
+		'The redhead adjusts her glasses. "Most of the world simply ignores magic or are protected from it by magic''s natural desire to remain hidden, but last night there was a powerful burst of magical energy, strong enough to be clearly seen by any with magical connections. Can you guess where this surge came from? Yeah, that cave you found. Apparently the surge occurred when you opened the seal to the archive. Anyway, that was when we started to search. That source of power is desired by many, but it is extremely dangerous and in the wrong hands could do untold horrors."'
+		'She stops for a few seconds for you to process the information. It seems really far fetched.'
+		'"Reinhold wants to prevent the amulet being misused. He is tasked with maintaining order and will search for you."'
 
 		act 'So, the whole world is just an illusion?':
 			*clr & cla
 			'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/system/1_openings/shared/npc_tatiana.jpg"></center>'
-			'"So magic exists and is used by all these people and creatures, but the rest of us just don''t see it, or convince ourselves it didn''t happen?" You ask.'
-			'The girl nods. "Yes. You''re a quick student. Machines, apartments, television and the Internet, all this really does exist and is in the form in which people see it. But if I say, hurl a fireball, then people might see that I threw a grenade or shot from a flamethrower. The human mind can''t process magic, so it blocks it as a way to protect the person from going crazy."'
-			'"Hence such things as little green men, UFOs, poltergeists, spontaneous combustion, are when people encounter a difficult to hide phenomenon and the conclusion is flawed. In some cases, if someone''s mind can not cope with the spell they witness, they can be driven crazy and then no one believes them."'
+			'"So magic exists and is used by all these people and creatures, but the rest of us just don''t see it, or convince ourselves it didn''t happen?"'
+			'The girl nods. "Yes. You''re a quick student. Machines, apartments, television and the Internet. All this really does exist and is in the form in which people see it. But if I say, hurl a fireball, then people might see that I threw a grenade or shot from a flamethrower. The human mind can''t process magic, so it blocks it as a way to protect the person from going crazy."'
+			'"Hence such things as little green men, UFOs, poltergeists and spontaneous combustion are when people encounter a difficult to hide phenomenon and the conclusion is flawed. In some cases, if someone''s mind can''t cope with the spell they witness, they can be driven insane."'
 
 			act 'And who are you?':
 				*clr & cla
 				'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/system/1_openings/shared/npc_tatiana.jpg"></center>'
 				'"And who are you?" you ask.'
-				'The girl smiled. "Me? I''m Tatiana, a young mage with a keen interest in magical phenomenon. I specialize in the treatment of mutations, and magic relating to the body. I have little combat skill, so I rely on the services of Gustav to provide some muscle. He''s a Mutant, his mutation is due to magical exposure and it gives him unmatched physical strength and he is a great tracker."'
+				'The girl smiles. "Me? I''m Tatiana, a young mage with a keen interest in magical phenomenon. I specialize in the treatment of mutations, and magic relating to the body. I have little combat skill, so I rely on the services of Gustav to provide some muscle. He''s a Mutant due to magical exposure. It gives him unmatched physical strength and he is a great tracker."'
 				'"The two of us run a detective agency for cover and money, but our real objective is studying magic and its effects."'
 
 				act 'What do you want from me?':
 					*clr & cla
 					'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/system/1_openings/shared/npc_tatiana.jpg"></center>'
 					'"What do you want from me?" you ask.'
-					'"Hmm, well... the amulet obviously," Tatiana replies. "When I looked for you, I was hoping to get that object of power to study but the power transferred to you first. The amulet will now be pretty much useless."'
-					'"But this is not good for you. You may think that since you have the amulets'' power, you can do anything. But in reality, you''re helpless without the skill to use it. Its power already knocked you out and I had to use magic to stabilize you."'
+					'"Well, the amulet obviously," Tatiana replies. "When I looked for you, I was hoping to get that object of power to study, but the power transferred to you first. The amulet will now be pretty much useless."'
+					'"But this is not good for you. You may think that since you have the amulet''s power, you can do anything. But in reality, you''re helpless without the skill to use it. Its power already knocked you out and I had to use magic to stabilize you."'
 
-					act 'What is this amulet? Where did it come from?':
+					act 'What is this amulet?':
 						*clr & cla
 						'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/system/1_openings/shared/npc_tatiana.jpg"></center>'
 						'"And what is this amulet? Where did it come from?" you ask.'
-						'Tatiana thinks about it for a few moments. "It was made by the trickster Rikudo, one of the most powerful ancient magicians before he died, he taunted the only living mage who could control its immense power by cursing him to be stuck in a female form and making it only activate for a male mage."'
-						'"Great. So I''ve been thrown into this mess by the dead owner of that ancient tomb. Hang on, I''m not male or a mage, how could the power be transferred to me?"'
-						'"It seems that its long time underground has caused it to malfunction and its power has entered your body."'
-						'"You are lucky to be a woman," Tatiana adds, "Rikudo''s power seems to only work if it is in a man''s body. Since you cannot harness its power you shouldn''t arouse suspicion."'
+						'Tatiana thinks about it for a few seconds. "It was made by the trickster Rikudo, one of the most powerful ancient magicians before he died. He taunted the only living mage who could control its immense power by cursing him to be stuck in a female form and making it only activate for a male mage."'
+						'"Great. So I''ve been thrown into this mess by the dead owner of that ancient tomb. Hang on! I''m not male or a mage, how could the power be transferred to me?"'
+						'"It seems that its long time underground caused it to malfunction and its power has entered your body."'
+						'"You''re lucky to be a woman," Tatiana adds. "Rikudo''s power seems to only work if it is in a man''s body. Since you can''t harness its power, you shouldn''t arouse any suspicion."'
 
 						act 'So what should I do?':
 							*clr & cla
 							'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/system/1_openings/shared/npc_tatiana.jpg"></center>'
-							'"Lay low for now. Go on with your life. We will contact you if anything comes up. Gustav here will drop you off at your '+iif($month = 'June','grandparent''s','parent''s')+'."'
+							'"Lay low for now. Get on with your life. We''ll contact you if anything comes up. Gustav here will drop you off at your '+iif($month = 'June','grandparent''s','parent''s')+' place."'
 							act 'Follow Gustav':
-								gs 'intro_sg_select', 'sg_settings'
-								gs 'intro_initialization'
 								money = 5000
 
 								*clr & cla
 								if start_location = 2:
 									'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/system/1_openings/shared/site_gadukino.jpg"></center>'
-									'You give Gustav directions to your grandparent''s house, half an hour later he drops you off at your grandparent''s yard in Gadukino.'
+									'You give Gustav directions to your grandparent''s house. Half an hour later, he drops you off at your grandparent''s yard in Gadukino.'
 								elseif start_location = 1:
 									'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/system/1_openings/shared/site_pavlovsk.jpg"></center>'
-									'You give Gustav directions to your family''s apartment building, half an hour later he drops you off in front of your apartment complex in Pavlovsk.'
+									'You give Gustav directions to your family''s apartment building. Half an hour later, he drops you off in front of your apartment complex in Pavlovsk.'
 								end
 								act '<center><b>Done</b></center>': gt 'intro_sg_m', 'six'
 							end
@@ -132,29 +131,19 @@ end
 
 if $ARGS[0] = 'six':
 	*clr & cla				
-	hour = 18
-	$loc = 'intro_sg_m'
-	$loc_arg = 'six'
-	'<center><b><font color = maroon>Character Face</font></b></center>'
-	'<center><b>Allows you to alter hair and eyes, use to match fixed profile picture if in use.</b></center>'
-	'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/system/1_openings/shared/character_creation_2.jpg"></center>'
-	*nl
-	'<center>Customize your:</center>'
-	'<center><a href="exec:gs ''intro_customization'', ''hair''"><img src="images/system/1_openings/shared/icon_hair.png"></a> <a href="exec:gs ''intro_customization'', ''eyes''"><img src="images/system/1_openings/shared/icon_eye.png"></a></center>'
-
-	act 'Continue':
-		showstat 1
-		showobjs 1
-		gs 'obj_din', 'old'
-		*clr & cla
-		'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/system/1_openings/2_sg/start_csg.jpg"></center>'
-		'Welcome to the Cursed Schoolgirl version! Guide <<$pcs_nickname>> through her school life, relationships and myriad of other issues that might pop up and all with the added spice of magic to keep things interesting!'
-		act 'Begin!':
-			if start_location = 2:
-				gt 'gadhouse', 'intro'
-			elseif start_location = 1:
-				gt 'bedrPar', 'intro'
-			end
+	gs 'intro_sg_select', 'sg_settings'
+	gs 'intro_initialization'
+	showstat 1
+	showobjs 1
+	gs 'obj_din', 'old'
+	*clr & cla
+	'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/system/1_openings/2_sg/start_csg.jpg"></center>'
+	'Welcome to the Cursed Schoolgirl version! Guide <<$pcs_nickname>> through her school life, relationships and myriad of other issues that might pop up, all with the added spice of magic to keep things interesting!'
+	act '<center><b>Begin!</b></center>':
+		if start_location = 2:
+			gt 'gadhouse', 'intro'
+		elseif start_location = 1:
+			gt 'bedrPar', 'intro'
 		end
 	end
 end

+ 86 - 71
locations/intro_sg_select.qsrc

@@ -93,11 +93,12 @@ if $ARGS[0] = 'start':
 	gs 'grades', 'createclass', 'school', 'his', 2, 2, 'yes', 'yes', 0, 0
 
 	'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/system/1_openings/shared/pre_1.jpg"></center>'
-	'Your name is <<$pcs_firstname>> <<$pcs_lastname>>, friends and family often calling you <<$pcs_nickname>>. Your mother''s name is <<$npc_firstname[''A29'']>> and your biological father left when you were a baby. Your mother married your stepfather, <<$npc_firstname[''A28'']>>, shortly afterwards. <<$npc_firstname[''A33'']>> is your older sister. She is two years older than you and is still living at home while working at the local grocery store. She chose not to attend college and instead spends most of her free time drinking with her friends and going to parties, much to your mother''s dismay. You also have a younger half-brother, <<$npc_firstname[''A34'']>>, who is really into sports, especially football, and is shaping up to be a fine athlete. He is a year younger than you and his father is your stepfather.'
-	*nl
-	'Your <<$npc_usedname[''A30'']>> lives in the same building as you do, though you rarely see her except when you pass her in the stairwell. She is your mother''s sister. <<$npc_usedname[''A54'']>>, as everyone calls him, is best friends with your stepfather. <<$npc_firstname[''A11'']>> <<$npc_lastname[''A11'']>>, your childhood friend, is the same age as you and grew up living in the same apartment building on the floor above yours. His father, <<$npc_firstname[''A112'']>>, is an old friend of your mother.'
+	'Your name is <<$pcs_firstname>> <<$pcs_lastname>>, nicknamed <<$pcs_nickname>> by friends and family. Your mother''s name is <<$npc_firstname[''A29'']>> and your biological father left when you were a baby, your mother marrying your stepfather, <<$npc_firstname[''A28'']>>, shortly afterwards.' 
+	'<<$npc_firstname[''A33'']>> is your older sister, who is two years older than you but is still living at home while working at the local grocery store. She chose not to attend university and instead spends most of her free time drinking and going to parties with her friends, much to your mother''s dismay.' 
+	'You also have a younger half-brother, <<$npc_firstname[''A34'']>>, who is really into sports, especially football, and is shaping up to be a fine athlete. He is a year younger than you and his father is your stepfather.'
+	'Your <<$npc_usedname[''A30'']>> lives in the same building as you do, though you rarely see her except when you pass her in the stairwell. She is your mother''s older sister. <<$npc_usedname[''A54'']>>, as everyone calls him, is best friends with your stepfather. <<$npc_firstname[''A11'']>> <<$npc_lastname[''A11'']>>, your childhood friend, is the same age as you and grew up living in the same apartment building on the floor above yours. His father, <<$npc_firstname[''A112'']>>, is an old friend of your mother.'
 
-	act 'Re-enter name/s': gt 'intro_sg_select', 'start'
+	act 'Re-enter name(s)': gt 'intro_sg_select', 'start'
 	act 'Continue':	gt 'intro_sg_select', 'SGStart2'
 end
 
@@ -193,7 +194,7 @@ if $ARGS[0] = 'pav_start':
 	'<center><h2>Pavlovsk</h2></center>'
 	'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/system/1_openings/shared/site_pavlovsk.jpg"></center>'
 	*nl
-	'<center>A provincial town in a rural area of Russia, it looks much like all the other towns in the region. Population: about 15,000 inhabitants.</center>'
+	'<center>A provincial town in a rural area of Russia, which looks much like all the other towns in the region. Population: 15,000.</center>'
 	start_location = 1
 	act 'Confirm location': gt 'intro_sg_select', 'charselect'
 	act 'Change location': gt 'intro_sg_select', 'SGStart3'
@@ -204,7 +205,7 @@ if $ARGS[0] = 'gad_start':
 	'<center><h2>Gadukino</h2></center>'
 	'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/system/1_openings/shared/site_gadukino.jpg"></center>'
 	*nl
-	'<center>A small farming village with many rickety wooden houses and even more ruins of houses. This village has seen better times.</center>'
+	'<center>A small farming village with just as many rickety old wooden houses dotting the landscape as ruins. The village has seen better days.</center>'
 	start_location = 2
 	act 'Confirm location': gt 'intro_sg_select', 'charselect'
 	act 'Change location': gt 'intro_sg_select', 'SGStart3'
@@ -215,19 +216,19 @@ if $ARGS[0] = 'charselect':
 	'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/system/1_openings/shared/pre_4.jpg"></center>'
 	'Select your personality/social group. Your social group will have a major defining impact upon your life in school and will determine your starting friends, starting traits and overall look. While you can always change groups later on, it takes time and effort, so choose wisely. Your five choices of social group are.'
 	*nl
-	'Nerds, geeks and good students. - These students tend to do well in school and are well liked by teachers and other adults and your parents will also be more proud of you. They tend to not have many friends outside of their own social group, however, and are also sometimes picked on or bullied. They are subpar athletically and place less value on looks and social skills than other cliques.'
+	'Nerds, geeks and good students - These students tend to do well in school and are well liked by teachers and other adults. They tend to not have many friends outside of their own social group, however, and are also sometimes picked on or bullied. They are subpar athletically and place less value on looks and social skills than other cliques.'
 	*nl
-	'Jocks and natural athletes. - These students are gifted in their chosen sport and are very athletically inclined. This means that they tend to be fit and in good shape, often making them better looking than many of the other students. They get along with other jocks and are respected by the cool kids of the school while being feared by the nerds, geeks and losers. They don''t value academic achievements and can come into conflict with the gopniks and other troublemakers.'
+	'Jocks and natural athletes - These students are gifted in their chosen sport and are very athletically inclined. This means that they tend to be fit and in good shape, often making them better looking than many of the other students. They get along with other jocks and are respected by the cool kids while being feared by the nerds and losers. They don''t value academic achievements and can come into conflict with the gopniks and other troublemakers.'
 	*nl
-	'The popular, cool and beautiful. - These students are typically socially-gifted and are often blessed with natural good looks. They are envied by many because of this, and most other kids want to be their friends. More than any of the other cliques, they have the ability to ruin someone''s reputation and make them social outcasts, which earns them the fear of many students. Being cool and good looking is all they value, so they tend to be subpar athletically and academically.'
+	'The popular, cool and beautiful - These students are typically socially-gifted and are often blessed with natural good looks. They are envied by many because of this, and most want to be their friends. More than any other clique, they have the ability to ruin someone''s reputation and make them social outcasts, which earns them the fear of many students. Being cool and good looking is all they value, so they tend to be subpar both athletically and academically.'
 	*nl
-	'Gopniks, rebels, punks and troublemakers. - These students don''t play by the rules and, in fact, will often happily piss on them if given half a chance. They are in decent shape from all of their fighting and troublemaking, but their predilection for drinking, smoking and drugs often counteracts this to a point. They are not the most well-liked students; teachers and parents alike take a dim view of them, as does the local police. Most other students fear them, either from the years of bullying or from the gopniks'' willingness to fight. Some students secretly envy their carefree attitude and apparent ability to sneer and wave off many of the social pitfalls that other students face.'
+	'Gopniks, rebels, punks and troublemakers - These students don''t play by the rules and, in fact, will often happily piss on them if given half a chance. They are in decent shape from all of their fighting and troublemaking, but their predilection for drinking, smoking and drugs often counteracts this to a point. They are not the most well-liked students; teachers and parents alike take a dim view of them, as do the local police. Most students fear them, either from the years of bullying or from the gopniks'' willingness to fight. Some students secretly envy their carefree attitude and apparent ability to sneer and wave off many of the social pitfalls that other students face.'
 	*nl
-	'Losers, teachers'' pets, sluts and the ugly. - These students are the outcasts - the kids no one likes to spend time with, other than to pick on or bully them. Perhaps they are just socially awkward and never made many friends, broke one of the unwritten social school rules, are ugly, a snitch, a slut and/or an outed gay boy. Either way, they all have one thing in common: they are easy targets to bully and mock.'
+	'Losers, teachers'' pets, sluts and the ugly - These students are the outcasts, the people no one likes to spend time with, other than to bully them. Perhaps they are just socially awkward and never made many friends, broke one of the unwritten social rules, are ugly, a snitch, a slut and/or an outed gay boy. Either way, they all have one thing in common: they are easy targets to bully and mock.'
 
 	act 'Full custom setup': gt 'intro_customization', 'start'
 
-	act 'Nerd, Geek, Student':
+	act 'Nerd':
 		*clr & cla
 		gs 'intro_sg_select', 'nerdinfo'
 		act 'I am the Queen of the Nerds!': gt 'intro_sg_select', 'nerdqueen'
@@ -237,7 +238,7 @@ if $ARGS[0] = 'charselect':
 
 	end
 
-	act 'Athlete, Jock':
+	act 'Jock':
 		*clr & cla
 		gs 'intro_sg_select', 'jockinfo'
 		act 'Avid volleyball player': gt 'intro_sg_select', 'volleyball'
@@ -246,7 +247,7 @@ if $ARGS[0] = 'charselect':
 		act 'Avid football player.': gt 'intro_sg_select', 'football'
 	end
 
-	act 'Popular, Cool, Beautiful':
+	act 'Popular':
 !!if we can do school uniforms gets an appropriate or borderline uniform.
 		*clr & cla
 		gs 'intro_sg_select', 'popularinfo'
@@ -254,7 +255,7 @@ if $ARGS[0] = 'charselect':
 		act 'I am beautiful': gt 'intro_sg_select', 'beautiful'
 	end
 
-	act 'Gopnik, Rebel, Punk, Troublemaker':
+	act 'Gopnik':
 !!If you can do uniforms then they can choose inappropriate or borderline
 !!can pick 1-3 tattoos at start
 		*clr & cla
@@ -265,7 +266,7 @@ if $ARGS[0] = 'charselect':
 		act 'An alternative, party girl or rebel': gt 'intro_sg_select', 'alternative'
 	end
 
-	act 'Outcast, Loser, Goth, Ugly':
+	act 'Outcast':
 		*clr & cla
 		gs 'intro_sg_select', 'outcastinfo'
 		act 'I have no friends': gt 'intro_sg_select', 'friendless'
@@ -363,38 +364,37 @@ end
 if $ARGS[0] = 'nerdinfo':
 	'<center><h4><font color="maroon">Nerd</font></h4></center>'
 	'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/system/1_openings/2_sg/nerd_0.jpg"></center>'
-	'While you were growing up, you spent virtually all of your free time at home, pursuing various cerebral pursuits. These might have included reading comics, fantasy or sci-fi books, learning about chess or computers or playing cards, board games, or RPGs with the other nerds in addition to faithfully going to school. While you have gained a huge amount of knowledge from this, your lack of interest in exercising as a child has left your body a little frail.'
-	*nl
-	'The long nights of trying to read in poor light have taken a toll on your eyesight as well, and you now need glasses to be able to read. Your cerebral pursuits have also had somewhat of a negative impact on your friendship with <<$npc_firstname[''A11'']>>: as you grew up. He became a gopnik and the two of you slowly started hanging out less and less, although you still consider each other to be friends. On the plus side, doing well in school has made your parents happy and has left you with some extra spending money as a reward for your hard work. Now...'
+	'Growing up, you spent virtually all of your free time at home, pursuing various cerebral pursuits. These might have included reading comics, fantasy or sci-fi books, learning about chess or computers or playing cards, board games and RPGs with the other nerds, in addition to faithfully going to school. While you have gained a huge amount of knowledge from this, your lack of interest in exercising as a child has left your body a little frail.'
+	'The long nights of trying to read in poor light have also taken a toll on your eyesight and you now require glasses. Your cerebral pursuits also had somewhat of a negative impact on your friendship with <<$npc_firstname[''A11'']>> as you grew up. He became a gopnik and the two of you slowly started hanging out often, although you still consider each other to be friends. On the plus side, doing well in school has made your parents happy and has left you with some extra spending money as a reward for your hard work. Now...'
 	*nl
 end
 
 if $ARGS[0] = 'jockinfo':
 	'<center><h4><font color="maroon">Jock</font></h4></center>'
 	'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/system/1_openings/2_sg/jock_0.jpg"></center>'
-	'While you were growing up, you spent virtually all of your free time outdoors. You loved playing sports, running, biking, horseback riding, hiking and most other outdoor activities. This has kept you in fairly good shape as well as decently socially active in a variety of team sports over the years. Doing this, however, negatively impacted your friendship with <<$npc_firstname[''A11'']>> somewhat. As you grew up, he became a gopnik and the two of you slowly started hanging out less and less, though you still consider each other to be friends. From all the sports available, you are an...'
+	'While you were growing up, you spent virtually all of your free time outdoors. You loved playing sports, running, biking and hiking. This has kept you in fairly good shape, as well as socially active in a variety of team sports over the years. Doing this, however, negatively impacted your friendship with <<$npc_firstname[''A11'']>>. As you grew up, he became a gopnik and the two of you slowly started hanging out less often, although you still consider each other to be friends. From all the sports available, you are an...'
 	*nl
 end
 
 if $ARGS[0] = 'popularinfo':
 	'<center><h4><font color="maroon">Popular</font></h4></center>'
 	'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/system/1_openings/2_sg/popular_0.jpg"></center>'
-	'You spent most of your childhood outdoors, playing with other girls and boys. As a result, you''re quite healthy. You''re also pretty strong verbally, with a keen understanding about how to get yourself out of trouble (or shifting the blame to someone else). You were never very interested in school or sports, however, and are only a sub-par student. Your popularity has negatively impacted your relationship with <<$npc_firstname[''A11'']>> somewhat, and you are not as close as you once were. Now...'
+	'You spent most of your childhood outdoors, playing with other boys and girls. As a result, you''re quite healthy and have a keen understanding about how to get yourself out of trouble (or shifting the blame to someone else). You were never very interested in school or sports, however, and are only a sub-par student. Your popularity has negatively impacted your relationship with <<$npc_firstname[''A11'']>>, and you''re not as close as you once were. Now...'
 	*nl
 end
 
 if $ARGS[0] = 'gopnikinfo':
 	'<center><h4><font color="maroon">Gopnik</font></h4></center>'
 	'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/system/1_openings/2_sg/gopnik_0.jpg"></center>'
-	'You spent most of your childhood outdoors, playing with the other girls and boys. As a result, you''re quite healthy. As you got older you lost any interest you might have once had with fitting in - now you do your own thing, and you’’re ready to tell anyone where they can stick it if they have a problem with that.'
-	'As you and <<$npc_firstname[''A11'']>> walked a similar path, your bond of friendship only deepened. This has had some repercussions on your school performance; you''re a sub-par student. It has also had some less enjoyable consequences leading you into more than your fair share of fights, into all sorts of problems at home, landing you in trouble and often punished at school, and even into a few run-ins with the local police. Now most consider you...'
+	'You spent most of your childhood outdoors, playing with the other boys and girls. As a result, you''re quite healthy. As you got older, you lost any interest you might have once had with fitting in - now you do your own thing, and you''re ready to tell anyone where they can stick it if they have a problem with that.'
+	'As you and <<$npc_firstname[''A11'']>> walked a similar path, your bond of friendship only deepened. This has had some repercussions on your school performance; you''re a sub-par student. It has also had some less than enjoyable consequences leading you into more than your fair share of fights, into all sorts of problems at home and landing you in trouble at school. You''ve even had a few run-ins with the local police. Most people now consider you...'
 	*nl
 end
 
 if $ARGS[0] = 'outcastinfo':
 	'<center><h4><font color="maroon">Outcast</font></h4></center>'
 	'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/system/1_openings/2_sg/outcast_0.jpg"></center>'
-	'You never really fit in. You’’re just one of those individuals who, by choice or circumstance, never really clicked with the other kids. As you got older things only got worse, and now you are seen as an outcast. This breaks one of the most important social rules among your peers, and you are now considered in the same vein as sluts, losers, gay boys and the like.'
+	'You never really fit in. You''re just one of those individuals who, by choice or circumstance, never really clicked with the other kids. As you got older things only got worse, and now you are seen as an outcast. This breaks one of the most important social rules among your peers, and you are now considered in the same vein as sluts, losers, gay boys and the like.'
 	'Being an outcast has also had a somewhat negative impact on your friendship with <<$npc_firstname[''A11'']>>. As you grew up, he became a gopnik and the two of you slowly started hanging out less and less, although you still consider each other to be friends - if just barely. You have no other real friends, and you get bullied and made fun of all the time because...'
 	*nl
 end
@@ -413,6 +413,7 @@ if $ARGS[0] = 'nerd':
 		pcs_lip = 1
 		pcs_lashes = 0
 	end
+	pcs_butt = 8
 	pcs_intel = 40
 	pcs_compskl = 20
 	pcs_chess = 20
@@ -440,8 +441,9 @@ end
 if $ARGS[0] = 'nerdqueen':
 	'<center><h4><font color="maroon">Queen of the nerds</font></h4></center>'
 	'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/system/1_openings/2_sg/nerd_1.jpg"></center>'
-	'While you love all things nerdy or geeky, what you love the most is hanging out with your fellow nerds and doing nerdy things together. This has made you fairly social for a nerd and more general in your areas of knowledge. As you got older and started to develop as a girl, it also made you much more aware of your sexuality than most nerds are comfortable with. As such, you cultivated that awareness more than most and are now more at ease with your body than most of the other nerds. By the usual nerd standards you are confident, dynamic and attractive. This has lead to you being the leader of your group of friends, and you are more acceptable to other social groups as a result, especially the cool kids who seem to respect your social skills and looks.'
-	act 'Select another': gt 'intro_sg_select', 'charselect'
+	'While you love all things nerdy, what you love the most is hanging out with your fellow nerds and doing nerdy things together. This has made you fairly social for a nerd and more general in your areas of knowledge. As you got older and started to develop as a woman, it also made you much more aware of your sexuality than most nerds are comfortable with. As such, you cultivated that awareness more than most and are now more at ease with your body than most of the other nerds.' 
+	'By nerd standards, you are confident, dynamic and attractive and this has led to you being the leader of your group of friends. You are more acceptable to other social groups as a result, especially the cool kids, who seem to respect your social skills and looks.'
+	act 'Select another option': gt 'intro_sg_select', 'charselect'
 	act 'Confirm this option':
 		gs 'intro_sg_select', 'nerd'
 		alterstrtimg = 8
@@ -474,6 +476,7 @@ if $ARGS[0] = 'nerdqueen':
 			pcs_lashes = 1
 		end
 		pcs_skin = 400
+		pcs_butt = 12
 		genbsize = 22
 !!d cup for ideal bmi
 		salo = 87
@@ -498,8 +501,9 @@ end
 if $ARGS[0] = 'goodstudent':
 	'<center><h4><font color="maroon">Good student</font></h4></center>'
 	'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/system/1_openings/2_sg/nerd_2.jpg"></center>'
-	'You just love school, and your grades are more than good enough to attend the university of your choosing after graduation - all you have to do is not let your grades slip. You have always tried to absorb every bit of knowledge possible and have done everything you could to excel in school. While this attitude has gained you a lot of respect from the other nerds, it did not earn you a lot of friends and you never found the time for sports. You are often asked to be a tutor and sometimes find yourself forced to do others'' homework for them. You have excellent grades, and your mother is very proud of you. She has shown her appreciation for your hard work by rewarding you with money.'
-	act 'Select another': gt 'intro_sg_select', 'charselect'
+	'You just love school, and your grades are more than good enough to attend the university of your choosing after graduation - all you have to do is not let them slip. You have always tried to absorb every bit of knowledge possible and have done everything you can to excel in school. While this attitude has gained you a lot of respect from the other nerds, it didn''t earn you a lot of friends and you never found the time for sports.' 
+	'You are often asked to be a tutor and sometimes find yourself forced to do others'' homework for them. You have excellent grades, and your mother is very proud of you. She has shown her appreciation for your hard work by rewarding you with money.'
+	act 'Select another option': gt 'intro_sg_select', 'charselect'
 	act 'Confirm this option':
 		gs 'intro_sg_select', 'nerd'
 		traits['nerd_points'] = 100
@@ -540,8 +544,9 @@ end
 if $ARGS[0] = 'computergeek':
 	'<center><h4><font color="maroon">Computer geek</font></h4></center>'
 	'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/system/1_openings/2_sg/nerd_3.jpg"></center>'
-	'You were always into computers, whether it be by playing video games, taking computers apart or learning programing and even hacking. You love everything about computers, but this passion left you little time to make friends - real-life friends, at least. You have managed to befriend many online players that you talk to while you play various video games, however, and you rarely spend any time outdoors, nor money on clothes or other girly stuff. You are far more interested in saving your money for a better computer in order to play even better games. You have considered hosting a web series of video games or vlogs - you even took the time to learn how to video edit - but you aren’’t sure if you want to put yourself out there like that.'
-	act 'Select another': gt 'intro_sg_select', 'charselect'
+	'You were always into computers, whether it be by playing video games, taking computers apart or learning programing and even hacking. You love everything about computers, but this passion left you little time to make friends - real-life friends, at least. You have managed to befriend many online players that you talk to while you play various video games, however, and you rarely spend any time outdoors, nor money on clothes or other girly stuff. You are far more interested in saving your money for a better computer in order to play even better games.' 
+	'You''ve considered hosting a web series of video games or vlogs - you even took the time to learn how to video edit - but you aren''t sure if you want to put yourself out there like that.'
+	act 'Select another option': gt 'intro_sg_select', 'charselect'
 	act 'Confirm this option':
 		gs 'intro_sg_select', 'nerd'
 		alterstrtimg = 10
@@ -581,8 +586,9 @@ end
 if $ARGS[0] = 'chessplayer':
 	'<center><h4><font color="maroon">Avid chess player</font></h4></center>'
 	'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/system/1_openings/2_sg/nerd_4.jpg"></center>'
-	'You were always into chess as a child, and you have studied all the great chess masters. You can even name them all as well as their favorite strategies! You find nothing more interesting than matching your wits against someone else’’s in a game of chess. It has left you with the ability to often see the consequences of your actions better than most as you are used to looking several moves ahead. All of this has left you with little time to make many friends, and you rarely spend any time outdoors.'
-	act 'Select another': gt 'intro_sg_select', 'charselect'
+	'You were always into chess as a child, and have studied all the great chess masters. You can name them all, as well as their favorite strategies! You find nothing more interesting than matching your wits against someone else''s in a game of chess. It has left you with the ability to often see the consequences of your actions better than most as you are used to looking several moves ahead.' 
+	'All of this has left you with little time to make many friends, and you rarely spend any time outdoors.'
+	act 'Select another option': gt 'intro_sg_select', 'charselect'
 	act 'Confirm this option':
 		gs 'intro_sg_select', 'nerd'
 		alterstrtimg = 11
@@ -624,6 +630,7 @@ if $ARGS[0] = 'jock':
 	genbsize = 12
 !!b cup for ideal bmi
 	pcs_skin = 400
+	pcs_butt = 12
 	kosmetica = 10
 	stanok = 10
 	shampoo = 20
@@ -672,7 +679,7 @@ if $ARGS[0] = 'volleyball':
 	'<center><h4><font color="maroon">Volleyball player</font></h4></center>'
 	'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/system/1_openings/2_sg/jock_1.jpg"></center>'
 	'Ever since the first time you played volleyball, you have been in love with the sport. You spent a lot of your free time trying to improve your ability, and it paid off; you''re actually quite good now! Your obsession with volleyball, however, has had some repercussions on your school performance. You''re a sub-par student, and you haven''t made many friends other than your fellow jocks. You are especially close with <<$npc_firstname[''A13'']>> and your coach.'
-	act 'Select another': gt 'intro_sg_select', 'charselect'
+	act 'Select another option': gt 'intro_sg_select', 'charselect'
 	act 'Confirm this option':
 		gs 'intro_sg_select', 'jock'
 		alterstrtimg = 12
@@ -707,10 +714,11 @@ end
 if $ARGS[0] = 'dancer':
 	'<center><h4><font color="maroon">Avid dancer</font></h4></center>'
 	'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/system/1_openings/2_sg/jock_2.jpg"></center>'
-	'You fell in love with dancing at an early age and never looked back. You spent a lot of your free time trying to improve your skills, and it paid off; you''re actually quite good now! <<$npc_firstname[''A11'']>> helpfully pointed out that an added benefit of dance was a greater increase in your flexibility (that is, of course, typical of <<$npc_firstname[''A11'']>>). Your obsession with dancing, however, has had some repercussions on your school performance. You''re a sub-par student, and you haven''t made many friends other than your fellow jocks.'
+	'You fell in love with dancing at an early age and never looked back. You spent a lot of your free time trying to improve your skills, and it paid off; you''re actually quite good now!' 
+	'<<$npc_firstname[''A11'']>> helpfully pointed out that an added benefit of dance was a greater increase in your flexibility (that is, of course, typical of <<$npc_firstname[''A11'']>>). Your obsession with dancing, however, has had some repercussions on your school performance. You''re a sub-par student, and you haven''t made many friends other than your fellow jocks.'
 	*nl
 	'You are particularly close with <<$npc_firstname[''A23'']>>, who is just as passionate about dancing as you are. You trained a lot together as children and have a mutual respect for each other''s abilities.'
-	act 'Select another': gt 'intro_sg_select', 'charselect'
+	act 'Select another option': gt 'intro_sg_select', 'charselect'
 	act 'Confirm this option':
 		gs 'intro_sg_select', 'jock'
 		alterstrtimg = 13
@@ -759,8 +767,8 @@ end
 if $ARGS[0] = 'runner':
 	'<center><h4><font color="maroon">Track runner</font></h4></center>'
 	'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/system/1_openings/2_sg/jock_3.jpg"></center>'
-	'Ever since you first tried track, you have been in love with the sport. When youre running, the rest of the world fades away and you experience a natural high like no other. You spent a lot of your free time trying to get better at it, and it paid off; you''re actually quite good now! Your obsession with running, however, has had some repercussions on your school performance. You''re a sub-par student, and you haven''t made many friends other than your fellow jocks and your coach.'
-	act 'Select another': gt 'intro_sg_select', 'charselect'
+	'Ever since you first tried track, you have been in love with the sport. When you''re running, the rest of the world fades away and you experience a natural high like no other. You spent a lot of your free time trying to get better at it, and it paid off; you''re actually quite good now! Your obsession with running, however, has had some repercussions on your school performance. You''re a sub-par student, and you haven''t made many friends other than your fellow jocks and your coach.'
+	act 'Select another option': gt 'intro_sg_select', 'charselect'
 	act 'Confirm this option':
 		gs 'intro_sg_select', 'jock'
 		alterstrtimg = 14
@@ -799,7 +807,7 @@ if $ARGS[0] = 'football':
 	'<center><h4><font color="maroon">Football player</font></h4></center>'
 	'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/system/1_openings/2_sg/jock_4.jpg"></center>'
 	'Ever since your first football game, you have been in love with the sport. You spent a lot of your free time trying to get better at it, and it paid off; you''re actually quite good now! Your obsession with football has had some repercussions on your school performance, however, and you''re now a sub-par student. You haven''t made many friends other than your fellow jocks, especially <<$npc_firstname[''A149'']>> and your coach.'
-	act 'Select another': gt 'intro_sg_select', 'charselect'
+	act 'Select another option': gt 'intro_sg_select', 'charselect'
 	act 'Confirm this option':
 		gs 'intro_sg_select', 'jock'
 		alterstrtimg = 15
@@ -870,6 +878,7 @@ if $ARGS[0] = 'cool':
 		pcs_lashes = 1
 	end
 	pcs_skin = 500
+	pcs_butt = 16
 	pcs_tan = 5
 	npc_rel['A33'] += 10
 	grupTipe=1
@@ -878,8 +887,9 @@ end
 if $ARGS[0] = 'socialite':
 	'<center><h4><font color="maroon">Sociable</font></h4></center>'
 	'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/system/1_openings/2_sg/popular_1.jpg"></center>'
-	'You have a ton of friends! You''re friends with all of the important kids at school, anyways, which is what really matters. You were very social growing up and enjoyed being around others, often becoming the center of attention. You have always had a knack of knowing the right thing to say at the right moment, which led to many other students wanting to be your friend. You can with a little work get along with nearly anyone if you put your mind to it.'
-	act 'Select another': gt 'intro_sg_select', 'charselect'
+	'You''re friends with all of the important kids at school, which is what really matters. You were very social growing up and enjoyed being around others, often becoming the center of attention.' 
+	'You''ve always had a knack for knowing the right thing to say at the right moment, which led to many other students wanting to be your friend. You can, with a little work, get along with nearly anyone if you put your mind to it.'
+	act 'Select another option': gt 'intro_sg_select', 'charselect'
 	act 'Confirm this option':
 		gs 'intro_sg_select', 'cool'
 		alterstrtimg = 16
@@ -921,8 +931,9 @@ end
 if $ARGS[0] = 'beautiful':
 	'<center><h4><font color="maroon">Beautiful</font></h4></center>'
 	'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/system/1_openings/2_sg/popular_2.jpg"></center>'
-	'You might not be the smartest and you might not be the most social or have the toughest attitude - but what you do have are natural good looks. That’s not something you can earn! You blossomed earlier than most girls and the boys took note, especially <<$npc_firstname[''A11'']>>, who started acting differently around you. You know he is attracted to you, but who can blame him? After all, you''re fairly certain that all of the boys (and even some of the girls) lust after you either openly or secretly. As you got older your looks only improved, and you are often considered one of the best looking girls in the room wherever you go. You are especially popular with the cool kids and jocks.'
-	act 'Select another': gt 'intro_sg_select', 'charselect'
+	'You might not be the smartest, be the most social or have the toughest attitude - but what you do have is natural good looks. You blossomed earlier than most girls and the boys took note, especially <<$npc_firstname[''A11'']>>, who started acting differently around you. As you got older your looks only improved, and you are often considered one of the best looking girls wherever you go.' 
+	'You are especially popular with the cool kids and jocks.'
+	act 'Select another option': gt 'intro_sg_select', 'charselect'
 	act 'Confirm this option':
 		gs 'intro_sg_select', 'cool'
 		alterstrtimg = 17
@@ -1018,6 +1029,7 @@ if $ARGS[0] = 'gopnik':
 	pcs_skin = 400
 	pcs_vag = 1
 	pcs_throat = 1
+	pcs_butt = 8
 	stat['hj'] = 10
 	stat['bj'] = 5
 	stat['vaginal'] = 1
@@ -1029,8 +1041,9 @@ end
 if $ARGS[0] = 'gopnikstart':
 	'<center><h4><font color="maroon">Gopnik</font></h4></center>'
 	'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/system/1_openings/2_sg/gopnik_1.jpg"></center>'
-	'You are a gopnik. While you are still low in the gopnik pecking order, you have already proven yourself to them and most fully accept you as an equal. You have problems at home and school due to your antisocial behavior. This is especially true with your mother and stepfather, who see you going down the wrong path. The teachers and the police all know you''re one of the local gopniks. The jocks have a not so friendly rivalry with you and the other gopniks, while you don''t get along much, have some mutal respect for you.'
-	act 'Select another': gt 'intro_sg_select', 'charselect'
+	'You are a gopnik. While you''re still low in the gopnik pecking order, you''ve already proven yourself to them and most of them accept you as an equal. You have problems at home and school due to your antisocial behavior. This is especially true with your mother and stepfather, who see you going down the wrong path.' 
+	'The jocks have a not so friendly rivalry with you and the other gopniks. While you don''t get along, some of them have mutal respect for you.'
+	act 'Select another option': gt 'intro_sg_select', 'charselect'
 	act 'Confirm this option':
 		gs 'intro_sg_select', 'gopnik'
 		gs 'npc_relationship', 'socialgroup_setting', -10, -10, -10, 20, -10, 0
@@ -1075,8 +1088,9 @@ end
 if $ARGS[0] = 'troublemaker':
 	'<center><h4><font color="maroon">Troublemaker</font></h4></center>'
 	'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/system/1_openings/2_sg/gopnik_2.jpg"></center>'
-	'You are a troublemaker. Nothing makes you happier than causing problems, whether it be petty larceny, getting into fights or vandalism. You live for the thrill of breaking the rules. You get along fairly well with the gopniks and they accept you as a kindred spirit. They seem to love your willingness to jump head first into any and all trouble you run across - and if you can''t find any, you will happily make your own, which keeps things lively. You have problems at home and school due to your antisocial behavior. This is especially true with your mother and stepfather, who see you going down the wrong path. The teachers and the police all know who you are.'
-	act 'Select another': gt 'intro_sg_select', 'charselect'
+	'You are a troublemaker. Nothing makes you happier than causing problems, whether it be petty larceny, getting into fights or vandalism. You live for the thrill of breaking the rules. You get along fairly well with the gopniks and they accept you as a kindred spirit, loving your willingness to jump head first into any and all trouble you run across - and if you can''t find any, you will happily make your own, which keeps things lively.' 
+	'You have problems at home and school due to your antisocial behavior. This is especially true with your mother and stepfather, who see you going down the wrong path. You are well known to both your teachers and the police.'
+	act 'Select another option': gt 'intro_sg_select', 'charselect'
 	act 'Confirm this option':
 		traits['nerd_points'] = -50
 		gs 'intro_sg_select', 'gopnik'
@@ -1131,8 +1145,8 @@ if $ARGS[0] = 'vitekgf':
 	'<center><h4><font color="maroon">Vitek''s girlfriend</font></h4></center>'
 	'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/system/1_openings/2_sg/gopnik_3.jpg"></center>'
 	'You are <<$npc_nickname[''A9'']>>''s girlfriend. You love the thrill and danger of hanging out with the gopniks, even if you lack the true attitude yourself. You met <<$npc_nickname[''A9'']>> after he and <<$npc_firstname[''A11'']>> became friends. There was something about his bad boy attitude that drew you in, and you soon found yourself falling for him.'
-	'As you developed, he started to take an interest in you as well. Soon thereafter the two of you started dating. You''re not technically a gopnik - you are considered more of a wannabe - but the rest of the gopniks seem to accept you anyways. You’’re not sure what would happen if you ever broke up with <<$npc_nickname[''A9'']>>, however, as being his girlfriend and hanging out with the other gopniks has cost you any real, close friends outside of their group.'
-	act 'Select another': gt 'intro_sg_select', 'charselect'
+	'As you developed, he started to take an interest in you as well and you soon started dating. You''re not technically a gopnik - you are considered more of a wannabe - but the rest of the gopniks seem to accept you anyways. You’’re not sure what would happen if you ever broke up with <<$npc_nickname[''A9'']>>, however, as being his girlfriend and hanging out with the other gopniks has cost you any real, close friends outside of their group.'
+	act 'Select another option': gt 'intro_sg_select', 'charselect'
 	act 'Confirm this option':
 		traits['nerd_points'] = -10
 		gs 'intro_sg_select', 'gopnik'
@@ -1208,9 +1222,9 @@ if $ARGS[0] = 'alternative':
 !!can choose two more starting tattoo''s
 	'<center><h4><font color="maroon">Alternative</font></h4></center>'
 	'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/system/1_openings/2_sg/gopnik_4.jpg"></center>'
-	'You march to your own tune. You’’re not a follower - you’’re a leader! You just have no desire to actually lead anything. You do what you want when you want and you do it with a fuck-it-all attitude. The local gopniks respect you and for the most part you get along with them. You''re not one of them, however, but rather a kindred spirit looking to walk your own path and raise a little hell along the way.'
-	*nl
-	'Unlike the gopniks, you have far less interest in fighting or causing problems, instead just looking for a good time - you love to party more than anything else. The cool kids don''t completely look down their nose at you. Even if they don''t approve of your clothes, they respect your love of looking nice and having a good time. You have problems at home and school due to your behavior. This is especially true with your mother and stepfather, who see you going down the wrong path.'
+	'You march to your own tune. You do what you want when you want, and do it with a fuck-it-all attitude. The gopniks respect you and for the most part you get along with them. You''re not one of them, however, but rather a kindred spirit looking to walk your own path and raise a little hell along the way.'
+	'Unlike the gopniks, you have far less interest in fighting or causing problems, you''re just looking for a good time - you love to party more than anything else. The cool kids don''t completely look down their nose at you. Even if they don''t approve of your clothes, they respect your love of looking nice and having a good time.' 
+	'However, you have problems at home and school due to your behavior. This is especially true with your mother and stepfather, who see you going down the wrong path.'
 	act 'Select another': gt 'intro_sg_select', 'charselect'
 	act 'Confirm this option':
 		traits['nerd_points'] = -20
@@ -1314,6 +1328,7 @@ if $ARGS[0] = 'outcast':
 		pcs_lashes = 0
 	end
 	pcs_skin = 0
+	pcs_butt = 4
 	pcs_tan = 0
 	grupTipe=5
 	shampoo = 20
@@ -1322,8 +1337,8 @@ end
 if $ARGS[0] = 'friendless':
 	'<center><h4><font color="maroon">Friendless</font></h4></center>'
 	'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/system/1_openings/2_sg/outcast_1.jpg"></center>'
-	'You were never very social and never learned how to make friends. You were often made fun of or bullied by the other kids as you grew up. As such, you naturally shielded away from them, an action that only served to isolate you even further. Now, years later, you have yet to make any real friends - even Vasily, who is your closest friend, wouldn''t be considered a particularly close one. In public, he scorns you like all the rest, but is a little nicer in private.'
-	act 'Select another': gt 'intro_sg_select', 'charselect'
+	'You were never very social and never learned how to make friends. You were often made fun of or bullied by the other kids as you grew up. As such, you naturally shielded away from them, an action that only served to isolate you even further. Now, years later, you have yet to make any real friends - even Vasily, your closest friend, wouldn''t be considered a particularly close one. In public, he scorns you like all the rest, but is a little nicer in private.'
+	act 'Select another option': gt 'intro_sg_select', 'charselect'
 	act 'Confirm this option':
 		gs 'intro_sg_select', 'outcast'
 		gs 'npc_relationship', 'socialgroup_setting', -10, -10, -10, -10, -10, 0
@@ -1359,10 +1374,10 @@ end
 if $ARGS[0] = 'uglyduckling':
 	'<center><h4><font color="maroon">Ugly duckling</font></h4></center>'
 	'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/system/1_openings/2_sg/outcast_2.jpg"></center>'
-	'Some girls blossom early and some have natural good looks... you got neither. In fact, you seem to have been cursed with an androgynous face and body. You have been mistaken for a boy more times than you would care to admit. You have never learned to use makeup, but maybe you should. It might help make people realize you are indeed a girl.'
-	*nl
-	'Your body seemed to have grown out of sync, leaving you looking odd and, at best, unattractive for most of your life. Now in your teens, your body is starting to even out in growth but you are still very androgynous and you are still considered by most to be ugly. Your lack of good looks has made you a social pariah. Nobody seems to like you or want to spend time with you unless they are making fun of you.'
-	act 'Select another': gt 'intro_sg_select', 'charselect'
+	'Some girls blossom early and others have natural good looks - you got neither. In fact, you seem to have been cursed with an androgynous face and body, and have been mistaken for a boy more times than you would care to admit.'
+	'Your body seems to have grown out of sync, leaving you looking odd and, at best, unattractive for most of your life. Now in your teens, your body is starting to even out in growth, but you''re still very androgynous and still considered ugly.' 
+	'Your lack of good looks has made you a social pariah. Nobody seems to like you or want to spend time with you unless they are making fun of you.'
+	act 'Select another option': gt 'intro_sg_select', 'charselect'
 	act 'Confirm this option':
 		gs 'intro_sg_select', 'outcast'
 		gs 'npc_relationship', 'socialgroup_setting_boys', -10, -10, -10, -10, 0, 0
@@ -1380,7 +1395,7 @@ if $ARGS[0] = 'uglyduckling':
 			pcs_lashes = 2
 		end
 		school_clothing = 3
-		salo = 210
+		salo = 125
 		willpowermax = 70
 		gs 'grades', 'grade_award', 'school', 'math', 55
 		gs 'grades', 'grade_award', 'school', 'rus', 25
@@ -1402,8 +1417,9 @@ end
 if $ARGS[0] = 'goodgirl':
 	'<center><h4><font color="maroon">Good girl</font></h4></center>'
 	'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/system/1_openings/2_sg/outcast_3.jpg"></center>'
-	'You are a good girl. The kind parents, teachers and adults love, but the other kids hate. You always reminded the teacher to give out homework and you would tell on anyone for doing anything. You love the attention you get from adults, and while you can feel lonely at times, you are still pretty happy knowing you''re a good girl. You also regularly attend church just like any good girl should. The nerds seem to tolerate you the most, probably because they almost never misbehave and always do their homework anyways.'
-	act 'Select another': gt 'intro_sg_select', 'charselect'
+	'You are a good girl. The kind parents, teachers and adults love, but the other kids hate. You always reminded the teacher to give out homework and would snitch on anyone for doing anything. You also regularly attend church.' 
+	'You love the attention you get from adults, and while you can feel lonely at times, you''re pretty happy knowing you''re a good girl. The nerds seem to tolerate you the most, likely because they almost never misbehave and always do their homework anyways.'
+	act 'Select another option': gt 'intro_sg_select', 'charselect'
 	act 'Confirm this option':
 		traits['nerd_points'] = 100
 		traits['nerd_status'] = 3
@@ -1458,12 +1474,10 @@ end
 if $ARGS[0] = 'slut':
 	'<center><h4><font color="maroon">Slut</font></h4></center>'
 	'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/system/1_openings/2_sg/outcast_4.jpg"></center>'
-	'You were the first girl at your age to lose her virginity, to your childhood friend Vasily. You became curious about sex far sooner than other kids your age and started masturbating long before the others in your year. You also found a desire for pornography and would masturbate to it. You loved the sensation so much that you wanted to find out how good sex would feel. Once you tried it, you learned that you loved it - you really love everything about it.'
-	*nl
-	'The boys took advantage of your sexual needs and made you give them handjobs, which then led to blowjobs under the bleachers during recess and after school (sometimes they would return the favour by fingering you or a few times even eating you out) You always savored swallowing their cum, and you even love how it tastes. The only thing you like more than sucking cock and swallowing cum is getting fucked by a huge cock while sucking on another one.'
-	*nl
-	'However, your sex addiction has made you a social pariah. The girls all despise you and the boys publicly mock you, although they don''t mind using you. The nerds completely avoid you, while the gopniks seem to tolerate you the most (likely because they enjoy your blowjobs)'
-	act 'Select another': gt 'intro_sg_select', 'charselect'
+	'You became curious about sex far sooner than other kids your age. You started masturbating long before the others in your year and loved the sensation so much that you wanted to find out how good sex would feel, becoming the first girl in your year to lose your virginity.'
+	'Boys took advantage of your sexual needs and made you give them handjobs, which then led to blowjobs under the bleachers during recess and after school. You always savored swallowing their cum, loving how it tastes.'
+	'However, your sex addiction has made you a social pariah. The girls all despise you and the boys publicly mock you, although they don''t mind using you. The nerds completely avoid you, while the gopniks seem to tolerate you the most, likely because they enjoy taking advantage of you.'
+	act 'Select another option': gt 'intro_sg_select', 'charselect'
 	act 'Confirm this option':
 		trait['commando_lvl'] = 2
 		trt_cumeater = 1 and cumeater_cheat = 1
@@ -1517,6 +1531,7 @@ if $ARGS[0] = 'slut':
 		pcs_vag = 10
 		pcs_ass = 10
 		pcs_throat = 10
+		pcs_butt = 8
 		pcs_inhib = 60
 		gs 'fame', 'pav', 'sex', 600
 		GspravkaT = 2
@@ -1559,10 +1574,10 @@ end
 if $ARGS[0] = 'goth':
 	'<center><h4><font color="maroon">Goth</font></h4></center>'
 	'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/system/1_openings/2_sg/outcast_5.jpg"></center>'
-	'There is always an oddball, the weirdo at every school and at yours, it seems you are the one. You have always felt different, like a person standing outside looking in at the world. You never felt like you fit in, at least until you watched some American movies, saw some goths and suddenly you felt like you belonged. You quickly used all the allowance you had to buy new clothes and makeup so you could finally feel good about yourself. Your family doesn''t approve, hell no one seems to approve but you don''t care.'
-	*nl
-    'You are the school''s resident Goth. The Dark Temptress that all the boys secretly dream of, weaver of bad poetry and suicide covenants... Yep, people have too much imagination. Most adults think that you are going to sacrifice their children. In fact, everyone seems to think you are going to sacrifice someone or commit suicide. The school''s kids aren''t better, with the so-called "cool girls" leading an ostracism campaign against you... Sigh... Fortunately, not everyone is a brainwashed sheep happily following all along, a few think for themselves. The nerds like your reading proclivity and that you are into some of the same things they are; you think they might even invite you to their game one day. A couple of the Gopniks like your party attitude, specifically the kids in the band Pizdá Buysto, who seem to respect your artistic disposition. Or maybe their lead singer just wants to get in your panties, it''s hard to tell.'
-    act 'Select another': gt 'intro_sg_select', 'charselect'
+	'Every school has their oddball, in your case - You. You never felt like you fit in, at least until you watched some American movies, saw some goths and suddenly felt like you belonged. You quickly used all the allowance you had to buy new clothes and makeup so you could finally feel good about yourself. Your family and classmates don''t approve, but you don''t care.'
+	'You''re the school''s resident Goth. The Dark Temptress that all the boys secretly dream of, weaver of bad poetry and suicide covenants. Everyone seems to think you''re going to sacrifice someone or commit suicide, and your classmates aren''t much better, with the so-called "cool girls" leading an ostracism campaign against you.'
+	'Fortunately, not everyone listens to them. The nerds like your reading proclivity and that you are into some of the same things they are; you think they might even invite you to their game night one day. A few of the gopniks like your party attitude, specifically those in the band, who seem to respect your artistic disposition. Or their lead singer just wants to get in your panties. It''s hard to tell.'
+    act 'Select another option': gt 'intro_sg_select', 'charselect'
 	act 'Confirm this option':
 		traits['nerd_points'] = -10
 		gs 'intro_sg_select', 'outcast'
@@ -1639,7 +1654,7 @@ if $ARGS[0] = 'sg_settings':
 	hcolfatherremember = pcs_haircol
 	hcolfronce = 1
 
-	!!Setting Kolkas birthday based off the PCs
+	!!Setting Kolkas birthday based off the player''s
 	koldobtmp_d = rand(1,28)
 	koldobtmp_y = birthyear
 	koldobtmp_m = birthmonth + 11

+ 5 - 5
locations/intro_sg_select_custom.qsrc

@@ -97,35 +97,35 @@ end
 if $ARGS[0] = 'modgrup':
 	*clr & cla
 	'Your current social group is <<$soc_grup>>.'
-	act 'Nerd, Geek, Student':
+	act 'Nerd':
 		killvar 'grupvalue'
 		$soc_grup = 'Nerd'
 		grupvalue[3] = 600
 		grupTipe = 3
 		gt 'intro_sg_select_custom','modgrup'
 	end
-	act 'Athlete, Jock':
+	act 'Jock':
 		killvar 'grupvalue'
 		$soc_grup = 'Jock'
 		grupvalue[2] = 600
 		grupTipe = 2
 		gt 'intro_sg_select_custom','modgrup'
 	end
-	act 'Popular, Cool, Beautiful':
+	act 'Popular':
 		killvar 'grupvalue'
 		$soc_grup = 'Cool'
 		grupvalue[1] = 600
 		grupTipe = 1
 		gt 'intro_sg_select_custom','modgrup'
 	end
-	act 'Gopnik, Rebel, Punk, Troublemaker':
+	act 'Gopnik':
 		killvar 'grupvalue'
 		$soc_grup = 'Gopnik'
 		grupvalue[4] = 600
 		grupTipe = 4
 		gt 'intro_sg_select_custom','modgrup'
 	end
-	act 'Outcast, Loser, Goth, Ugly':
+	act 'Outcast':
 		killvar 'grupvalue'
 		$soc_grup = 'Outcast'
 		grupTipe = 5

+ 88 - 107
locations/intro_sg_tg.qsrc

@@ -11,7 +11,7 @@ if $ARGS[0] = 'start':
 	'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/system/1_openings/shared/npc_ivan.jpg"></center>'
 	'You are Mikhail Ivanov.'
 	'<<$startdob>>'
-	'Your parents died shortly after you were born. Your only remaining relative, your great uncle Ivan (pictured), took you in. Your uncle has always made it clear that he took you in as a courtesy to your parents, not to become one himself. You two never became close, causing a lonely childhood.'
+	'Your parents died shortly after you were born and our only remaining relative, your great uncle Ivan, took you in. Your uncle has always made it clear that he took you in as a courtesy to your parents, not to become one himself. You never became close, resulting in a lonely childhood.'
 	act 'Continue':
 		*clr & cla
 		'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/system/1_openings/4_csb/1.jpg"></center>'
@@ -19,15 +19,15 @@ if $ARGS[0] = 'start':
 		act 'Continue':
 			*clr & cla
 			'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/system/1_openings/4_csb/2.jpg"></center>'
-			'Your teenage years were beset by the same changes as the rest of the boys your age: You got taller and gained some muscle weight, your shoulders widened, your voice squeaked until it deepened, and hair sprouted from everywhere on your body.'
-			'You spent most of the last few years in a near-constant state of arousal, set off by as little as a suggestively shaped vegetable. Thankfully the awkward changes and acne have started to subside, leaving you looking like the young man you will become.'
+			'Your teenage years were beset by the same changes as other boys your age: You got taller and gained some muscle, your shoulders widened, your voice deepened and hair sprouted from everywhere on your body.'
+			'You spent most of the last few years in a near-constant state of arousal, set off by as little as a suggestively shaped vegetable. Thankfully, the awkward changes and acne have started to subside, leaving you looking like the young man you will become.'
 			*nl
-			'But… But you are lonely. Maybe a little horny… who are you kidding? You are <b>very</b> horny. A horny 16 year old teen: that is the age when male sexuality peaks, according to the textbooks. Sadly your overflowing sex drive is not getting cared for by a loving girlfriend, instead you just walk around with a hardon almost every day, non stop.'
-			'You need a girlfriend, someone to talk to, to flirt with, to slowly but surely lure out of her various layers of clothing… a girlfriend. You would settle for a friend with benefits; it sounded hot in the tv show you saw at one point. Or even just some school sex, but the girls in your class won''t give you any attention, at least the ones that aren''t utterly ugly. Most ignore you, or when they do acknowledge you exist, they don''t take pity on you and instead often mock your awkwardness. You never learned how to talk to girls and because your mother died you''ve never had a female to help you understand girls. Now that is making your life, among other things, very hard.'
+			'But you are lonely. Lonely and extremely horny. Unfortunately, your overflowing sex drive is not getting cared for by a loving girlfriend and you walk around with an erection almost every day, non stop.'
+			'You need a girlfriend, someone to talk to, to flirt with, to slowly but surely lure out of her various layers of clothing. You would settle for a friend with benefits; it sounded hot in the TV show you saw. Or even just some casual sex, but the girls in your class won''t give you any attention, at least the ones that aren''t utterly ugly. Most ignore you, or when they do acknowledge you, don''t take pity on you and instead mock your awkwardness. You never learned how to talk to girls and because your mother died, you''ve never had a female to help you understand girls. Now that is making your life, among other things, very hard.'
 			act 'Continue':
 				*clr & cla
 				'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/system/1_openings/4_csb/3.jpg"></center>'
-				'Only recently your loneliness and your natural tendency for peeping resulted in calamity: you took a peek at the girls locker room at school. They were so beautiful, well most of them anyways. You got so horny watching them get undressed and then showering you couldn''t help yourself, you don''t know what came over you. You pulled out your dick and started to masturbate, trying to stay out of sight, but apparently you made too much noise. When two girls come over to investigate, they caught you and started screaming. You tried to run, but were caught and taken the Headmaster who called your uncle and told him what you had done. Since then the girls at school haven''t stopped making cruel jokes about you being a pervert, or apparently how small a cock you supposedly have. You are not small! You are average, right?!'
+				'Only recently your loneliness and natural tendency for peeping resulted in calamity - You peeked into the girls locker room at school. They were so beautiful, well most of them anyways. You got so horny watching them get undressed and then showering you couldn''t help yourself, you don''t know what came over you. You pulled out your dick and started to masturbate, trying to stay out of sight, but apparently made too much noise. When two girls came over to investigate, they caught you and started screaming. You tried to run, but were caught and taken the Headmaster, who called your uncle and told him what you had done. Since then, girls haven''t stopped making cruel jokes about you being a pervert, or how small your cock supposedly is.'
 				'Everyone you knew quickly turned on you and nothing you could say worked to change their minds. You became an outcast and received regular beatings from the other guys.'
 				act 'Continue': gt 'intro_sg_tg', 'intro_2_name'
 			end
@@ -38,9 +38,9 @@ end
 if $ARGS[0] = 'intro_2_name':
 	*clr & cla
 	'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/system/1_openings/4_csb/4.jpg"></center>'
-	'Now your reputation is in tatters. You''ve become the school outcast and no girl will give you the time of day, let alone agree to sleep with you. Out of horny desperation and loneliness you turn to the Internet to make friends. While on a forum for a mobile game you happened to meet a girl from the nearby town of Pavlovsk. You both liked the game and quickly hit it off and started talking almost every day.'
+	'Your reputation was in tatters and no girl would give you the time of day, let alone agree to sleep with you. Out of horny desperation and loneliness, you turn to the Internet to make friends. While on a forum for a mobile game, you happened to meet a girl from the nearby town of Pavlovsk. You both liked the game and quickly hit it off, talking almost every day.'
 
-	act 'Her name is ...':
+	act 'Her name was ...':
 		$pcs_firstname = 'Svetlana'
 		$pcs_lastname = 'Lebedev'
 		$pcs_nickname = 'Sveta'
@@ -68,12 +68,12 @@ end
 if $ARGS[0] = 'intro_3':
 	*clr & cla
 	'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/system/1_openings/4_csb/17.jpg"></center>'
-	'Her name is <<$pcs_firstname>> "<<$pcs_nickname>>" <<$pcs_lastname>>. She was born on the same day as you. You don''t know why but she seems to like you, maybe she doesn''t have many friends either. You can''t believe your luck; this might be your saving grace.'
-	'You spend the next few weeks messaging back and forth. <<$pcs_nickname>> tells you all about her life as well as her likes and dislikes.'
+	'Her name was <<$pcs_firstname>> <<$pcs_lastname>>, "<<$pcs_nickname>> for short. You don''t know why, but she seemed to liked you. Maybe she was as lonely as you were. You couldn''t believe your luck.'
+	'You spent the next few weeks messaging back and forth. <<$pcs_nickname>> told you all about her life, as well as her likes and dislikes.'
 
 	act 'Continue': gt 'intro_sg_tg', 'intro_4'
 
-	act 'Re-enter her names':
+	act 'Re-enter her name(s)':
 		$pcs_firstname = 'Svetlana'
 		$pcs_lastname = 'Lebedev'
 		$pcs_nickname = 'Sveta'
@@ -101,14 +101,14 @@ end
 if $ARGS[0] = 'intro_4':
 	*clr & cla
 	'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/characters/pavlovsk/resident/mom/mother.jpg"></center>'
-	'You find out about her mother Natasha, and how her biological father left when she was a baby. Her mother remarried shortly afterwards to a man called Vladimir.'
-	'She has a sister named Anya who is a year older than her. Anya chose to live at home instead of going to college, working at the local grocery in the day and partying at night.'
-	'<<$pcs_nickname>> has a half-brother Kolka, who is a year younger than her and really into football.'
+	'You found out about her mother Natasha, and how her biological father left when she was a baby. Her mother remarried shortly afterwards to a man called Vladimir.'
+	'She had a sister named Anya who was a few years older than her. Anya chose to live at home instead of going to college, working at the local grocery during the day and partying at night.'
+	'She also had a half-brother Kolka, who was a year younger than her and really into football.'
 	'Her mother''s sister, Aunt Luda, lives on the top floor of the same building as her. Her stepfather''s best friend is called Uncle Misha, who lives across the hall. Her mother''s old friend Sergey Shulgin lives on the floor above them, and <<$pcs_nickname>>''s old childhood friend Vasily is his son.'
 	*nl
-	'Her great grandparents live in a nearby village, where she occasionally spends a weekend. Apparently her mother''s parents are both dead.'
-	'You listen to her complaining about her extended family and about how she and Vasily drifted apart, comforting her as best you can. Yet you can''t help but feel a little jealous at how many caring relatives she has, given that your only relation is a great uncle who is about to kick you onto the streets for the sake of his own reputation.'
-	'You do the best you can to repress any resentment towards <<$pcs_nickname>> about how little she appreciates what she has.'
+	'Her great grandparents live in a nearby village, where she occasionally spent a weekend. Apparently, her mother''s parents are both dead.'
+	'You listened to her complaining about her extended family and about how she and Vasily drifted apart, comforting her as best you could. Yet you can''t help but feel a little jealous at how many caring relatives she has, given that your only relation is a great uncle who is about to kick you onto the streets for the sake of his own reputation.'
+	'You did the best you could to repress any resentment towards <<$pcs_nickname>> about how little she appreciated what she had.'
 
 	act 'When she talks about her mother, she calls her ...':
 
@@ -125,25 +125,27 @@ end
 
 if $ARGS[0] = 'intro_5':
 	*clr & cla
+	if $month = 'August': $cbpre_text1 = ' the end of'
 	'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/system/1_openings/4_csb/6.jpg"></center>'
-	'A couple months pass. You and <<$pcs_nickname>> continue to talk, and you learn even more about her life. During your summer holidays you bring up the idea of meeting up. <<$pcs_nickname>> is excited at the prospect and you agree to meet at the café where her mother works.'
+	'A few months passed. You and <<$pcs_nickname>> continued to talk, and you learned even more about her life. As<<$cbpre_text1>> summer break approaches, you bring up the idea of meeting up. <<$pcs_nickname>> was excited at the prospect and you agreed to meet at the café where her mother works.'
 
+	killvar '$cbpre_text1'
 	act 'Continue':
 		*clr & cla
 		'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/system/1_openings/4_csb/7.jpg"></center>'
-		'Things at home haven''t been doing so well during this time.'
-		'Instead of the rumors dying, they have kept escalating over time. You''ve had to plan your routes home from school to avoid spots where you will be cornered and beaten. You spend quite some time with chatting with her, and when the summer break comes and you finally get out of school you wonder whether you can finally meet your chat buddy -and maybe make her your girl...'
+		'Things at home haven''t been going so well during this time.'
+		'Instead of the rumors dying, they kept escalating. You''ve had to plan your routes home from school to avoid spots where you''ll be cornered and beaten. You spend quite some time chatting with her, and when the summer break comes and you finally get out of school, you wonder whether you can finally meet your chat buddy - and maybe make her your girl...'
 		act 'Continue':
 			*clr & cla
 			'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/system/1_openings/4_csb/8.jpg"></center>'
-			'The morning you have agreed to meet her, you pack up condoms and some spare cash into a backpack, heading off to the train station in the hopes of getting a girl friend or at least getting laid.'
+			'The morning you agreed to meet her, you pack condoms and some spare cash into a backpack before heading off to the train station in the hopes of getting a girlfriend, or at least getting laid.'
 			'On the train ride to Pavlovsk, you get a message from <<$pcs_nickname>>. Her parents have taken her to spend time with her grandparents in Gadukino. She was unable to get out of the trip, since her mother has been upset at how she has been spending so much time on her phone and not with her family.'
 			'With no other choice, you buy a second ticket to meet her at Gadukino.'
 			act 'Travel to Gadukino':
 				*clr & cla
 				'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/locations/shared/train/gadplat.jpg"></center>'
-				'You get off the train next to a small road in the middle of nowhere. A dirt road leads to a small village made up of rickety wooden houses and even more ruined ones. Unsure of which house belongs to <<$pcs_nickname>>''s family, you pull out your phone to text her that you have arrived.'
-				'A few minutes later, an excited teenage girl comes rushing down one of the dirt roads. You double-check a picture of <<$pcs_nickname>> on your phone, as this is the first time you have seen her with your own eyes.'
+				'You get off the train next to a small road in the middle of nowhere. A dirt road leads to a small village made up of rickety wooden houses and even more ruined ones. Unsure which house belongs to <<$pcs_nickname>>''s family, you pull out your phone to text her.'
+				'A few minutes later, an excited teenage girl comes rushing down one of the dirt roads. You double-check a picture of <<$pcs_nickname>> on your phone, as this is the first time you''ve seen her with your own eyes.'
 				act 'Take a look at her picture': gt 'intro_sg_tg', 'settings'
 			end
 		end
@@ -277,27 +279,18 @@ if $ARGS[0] = 'settings':
 		$startdob = 'Your birthday: <B><<birthmonth>>/<<birthday>>/<<birthyear>></B> (MM/DD/YYYY)'
 	end
 
-	*nl
-
-	'<a href="exec:gt ''intro_customization'', ''birthday''"><<$startdob>></a>.'
-
+	'<a href= "exec:gt ''intro_customization'', ''birthday''"><<$startdob>></a>.'
+	
 	gt 'intro_sg_tg', 'intro_6_looks'
 end
 
 if $ARGS[0] = 'intro_6_looks':
 	$loc = 'intro_sg_tg'
-	$loc_arg = 'intro_6_looks'
-	killvar '$startdob'
-	!killvar 'date_toggle'
-
-	$holyday = '<b>Summer holidays</b>'
-
-	kanikuli = 5
-
+	$loc_arg = 'intro_7'
 	*clr & cla
 	if player_avatar = 1:
 		'<center><img HEIGHT = 478 src="images/avatar.jpg"></center>'
-		'She looks exactly like the picture she sent you, use to match fixed profile picture.'
+		'She looks exactly like the picture she sent you.'
 	else
 		'<center><b><font color = maroon>Character Face</font></b></center>'
 		'<center><b>Allows you to alter hair and eyes.</b></center>'
@@ -309,31 +302,31 @@ if $ARGS[0] = 'intro_6_looks':
 
 	
 	act 'Meet her': gt 'intro_sg_tg', 'intro_7'
-	act 'Customise Sveta': $loc_arg = 'intro_7' & gt 'intro_customization', 'start'
+	act 'Customise <<$pcs_firstname>>': $loc_arg = 'intro_7' & gt 'intro_customization', 'start'
 end
 
 
 if $ARGS[0] = 'intro_7':
 	*clr & cla
 	'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="<<FUNC(''$face_image'')>>"></center>'
-	'She''s shorter than you but rather tall for a woman, with a body that is neither too fat nor especially skinny. On her chest rest a pair of decently-sized breasts. Her <<$curly>><<$pcdesc_hairlength>> hair is <<$pcs_haircol>>.'
+	'She''s shorter than you, but rather tall for a girl, with a body that is neither too fat nor especially skinny. On her chest rest a pair of decently-sized breasts. Her <<$curly>><<$pcdesc_hairlength>> hair is <<$pcs_haircol>>.'
 	'She has <<$pcs_eyecol>> eyes with <<$pcs_lashes>>'+iif(glass > 0, ' hidden behind a pair of cheap glasses.', '.')
-	'She looks like she has spent some time in front of the mirror trying to pretty herself up, and her clothes are very clean. Despite that, she still looks rather average. Like she is the type of girl that would be a background character in another person''s life.'
+	'She looks like she''s spent some time in front of the mirror trying to pretty herself up, and her clothes are very clean. Despite that, she still looks rather average. Like she is the type of girl that would be a background character in another person''s life.'
 
 	act 'Go for a walk':
 		*clr & cla
 		'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/system/1_openings/shared/site_gadukino.jpg"></center>'
-		'You both walk along a dirt road heading through grain fields and towards a forest. <<$pcs_nickname>> is holding your hand and keeps babbling on, asking you question after question.'
+		'You both walk along a dirt road heading through grain fields towards a forest. <<$pcs_nickname>> holds your hand and keeps babbling on, asking you question after question.'
 
 		act 'Keep walking':
 			*clr & cla
 			'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/system/1_openings/shared/site_ruin.jpg"></center>'
-			'You end up being dragged into her pace, getting lost in the conversation between you two. Before long you look up and realize that while you were talking you ended up somewhere in the forest. Just ahead of you is an old ruin.'
+			'You end up being dragged into her pace, getting lost in the conversation. Before long, you look up and realize that, while you were talking, you''ve ended up somewhere in the forest. Just ahead of you is an old ruin.'
 
 			act 'Take a rest and make a move':
 				*clr & cla
 				'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/system/1_openings/4_csb/9.jpg"></center>'
-				'You see a large stone at the ruins where you and <<$pcs_nickname>> decide to sit down. Being this close to a girl has given you a hardon, you pull out your shirt and do your best to hide it. Then she turns and looks at you and you feel this is your moment, you lean in to kiss her when suddenly...'
+				'You see a large stone at the ruins where you and <<$pcs_nickname>> decide to sit down. Being this close to a girl has given you a hardon, so you pull out your shirt and do your best to hide it. She turns and looks at you and you feel this is your moment, so you lean in to kiss her when...'
 
 				act 'What''s that sound?':
 					*clr & cla
@@ -343,26 +336,26 @@ if $ARGS[0] = 'intro_7':
 					lcolor = rgb(106, 90, 205)
 
 					'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/system/1_openings/shared/site_tunnel_1.jpg"></center>'
-					'A loud crack runs through the ruins. The ground gives way beneath you, sending both of you tumbling down into a dark hole. Miraculously you both manage to land with only minor scrapes and bruises. You curse and look around at your surroundings.'
-					'You seem to be in an underground chamber of some sort. Looking up you see that climbing out is not an option. There is also an old gate on one side of the chamber, but it''s either locked or rusted shut. Looks like the only way out is the tunnel on the other side of the chamber.'
-					'Thoughts of getting a kissing picture have been thoroughly broken. You have more immediate concerns of survival. You pull your backpack back onto your shoulders, turn on the flashlight on your phone, and lead <<$pcs_nickname>> out the only way you can.'
+					'A loud crack runs through the ruins and the ground gives way beneath you, sending you both tumbling down into the dark. Miraculously, you both manage to land with only minor scrapes and bruises. You curse and look around at your surroundings.'
+					'You seem to be in an underground chamber of some sort. Looking up, you see that climbing out is not an option. There is also an old gate on one side of the chamber, but it''s either locked or rusted shut. Looks like the only way out is the tunnel on the other side of the chamber.'
+					'Thoughts of getting a kissing picture have been thoroughly broken. You have more immediate concerns, so you pull your backpack back onto your shoulders, turn on the flashlight on your phone, and lead <<$pcs_nickname>> out the only way you can.'
 
 					act 'Follow the tunnel':
 						*clr & cla
 						'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/system/1_openings/shared/site_tunnel_2.jpg"></center>'
-						'The tunnel goes on for what feels like miles. You start to worry that your phone battery will die.'
+						'The tunnel goes on for what feels like miles. You start to worry about your phone''s battery dying.'
 
 						act 'Keep going':
 							*clr & cla
 							'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/system/1_openings/shared/site_cave_altar.jpg"></center>'
-							'At the end of the tunnel you find a dead end. Or at least it seems so. <<$pcs_nickname>> notices light coming through the cracks in the wall. You do your best to knock it down.'
-							'After a few good hits the wall crumbles and you find yourself in another chamber filled with old pottery and baubles. Opposite you is another tunnel, that hopefully leads out. In the center of the room is an altar and on it is what seems to be the centerpiece of this room, a strange amulet.'
+							'Reaching the end of the tunnel, you find a dead end. Or at least it seems to be. <<$pcs_nickname>> notices light coming through the cracks in the wall. You do your best to knock it down.'
+							'After a few good hits, the wall crumbles and you find yourself in another chamber filled with old pottery and baubles. Opposite you is another tunnel that hopefully leads out. In the center of the room is an altar and on it is what seems to be the centerpiece of this room; a strange amulet.'
 
 							act 'Examine the amulet':
 								*clr & cla
 								'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/system/1_openings/shared/item_amulet.jpg"></center>'
-								'You pick up the strange amulet and examine it. You notice it''s much lighter than it looks, and unusually warm for a piece of metal. It''s shaped like an antique oil lamp and... is that a penis? This is clearly very old, you think to yourself.'
-								'While holding the amulet, you realize that it''s getting warmer, to the point of being almost hot. Suddenly you feel heat coursing through your entire body. You feel a surge of strength inside you. It''s like you just finished a long jog, but without the fatigue.'
+								'You pick up the strange amulet and examine it. You notice it''s much lighter than it looks, and unusually warm for a piece of metal. It''s shaped like an antique oil lamp and... is that a penis? This is clearly very old.'
+								'While holding the amulet, you realize that it''s getting warmer, to the point of being almost hot. You suddenly feel heat coursing through your entire body and feel a surge of strength inside you. It''s like you just finished a long jog, but without the fatigue.'
 								'<<$pcs_nickname>> touches your arm, asking what you found. "Just some old junk," you reply as you pocket the amulet. "Come on, let''s get going."'
 
 								act 'Find a way out':
@@ -374,7 +367,7 @@ if $ARGS[0] = 'intro_7':
 									act 'Sneak out':
 										*clr & cla
 										'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/system/1_openings/shared/site_road.jpg"></center>'
-										'The workers shift has long since finished so sneaking out isn''t too hard. The site is on a highway so hopefully you can make it back before people notice that <<$pcs_nickname>> is missing. It''s already late in the afternoon, you''re hoping you can get back before dark.'
+										'The workers shift has long since finished, so sneaking out isn''t too hard. The site is on a highway, so hopefully you can make it back before people notice that <<$pcs_nickname>> is missing. It''s already late in the afternoon and you''re hoping you can get back before dark.'
 
 										act 'Walk towards Gadukino':
 											*clr & cla
@@ -387,8 +380,7 @@ if $ARGS[0] = 'intro_7':
 											'You and <<$pcs_nickname>> walk along the road for several hours. The sun has started to set and the trees cast long shadows across the road. <<$pcs_nickname>> is lagging behind, getting tired.'
 											'You stick your hands in your pockets, slowing down to let her catch up. You feel a hard object and pull out the amulet to look at it.'
 											'It still looks kind of funny, but holding it is sending a pleasant rush of heat and energy through you. There''s something about it that...'
-											'Suddenly, <<$pcs_nickname>> grabs your arm.'
-											'"Who''s that?"'
+											'Suddenly, <<$pcs_nickname>> grabs your arm. "Who''s that?"'
 
 											act 'Look up': gt 'intro_sg_tg', 'intro_8'
 										end
@@ -411,12 +403,12 @@ if $ARGS[0] = 'intro_8':
 	lcolor = rgb(106, 90, 205)
 	'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/system/1_openings/4_csb/10.jpg"></center>'
 	'You look up to see a dark figure in a long coat. The shadows cast by the setting sun obscure his figure, but you can see him striding purposefully towards you.'
-	'All of a sudden a cold chill of fear run through you. Two teenagers alone, in the dark, on the side of a road, in the middle of nowhere, being approached by a tall figure cloaked in shadows? There are dozens of horror stories that begin this way, and you don''t want to stick around to find out how it ends.'
+	'All of a sudden, a cold chill of fear run through you. Two teenagers alone, in the dark, on the side of a road, in the middle of nowhere, being approached by a tall figure cloaked in shadows? There are dozens of horror stories that begin this way, and you don''t want to stick around to find out how it ends.'
 
 	act 'Run':
 		*clr & cla
 		'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/system/1_openings/shared/npc_reinhold.jpg"></center>'
-		'<<$pcs_nickname>> seems to share your thoughts, and she grabs your hand and dashes into the woods, pulling you along with her. Amidst the panic the amulet slips from your hands and lands in the grass, giving off a slight glow that briefly illuminates the face of the man who was following you. Your long legs allow you to take the lead, dragging <<$pcs_nickname>> behind you into the forest.'
+		'<<$pcs_nickname>> seems to share your thoughts, and she grabs your hand and dashes into the woods, pulling you along with her. Amidst the panic, the amulet slips from your hands and lands in the grass, giving off a slight glow that briefly illuminates the face of the man who was following you. Your long legs allow you to take the lead, dragging <<$pcs_nickname>> behind you into the forest.'
 
 		act 'Keep running':
 			*clr & cla
@@ -426,32 +418,31 @@ if $ARGS[0] = 'intro_8':
 			lcolor = rgb(106, 90, 205)
 
 			'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/locations/gadukino/forest/gadforestlost_night0.4.jpg"></center>'
-			'You drag <<$pcs_nickname>> along in a mad dash to escape the dark figure. You twist and turn, trying to lose him in the woods. After a few minutes you feel <<$pcs_nickname>>''s hand rip out of your grasp. You look back to see her collapsing on the ground, panting in exhaustion. There''s no sign of the man anywhere. You sigh in relief, you must have lost him.'
+			'You drag <<$pcs_nickname>> along in a mad dash to escape the dark figure. You twist and turn, trying to lose him in the woods. After a few minutes, you feel <<$pcs_nickname>>''s hand rip out of your grasp. You look back to see her collapsing on the ground, panting in exhaustion. There''s no sign of the man anywhere, and you sigh in relief.'
 
 			act 'Continue':
 				*clr & cla
 				'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/locations/gadukino/forest/howl.jpg"></center>'
-				'Suddenly your hear a terrifying howl close behind you. Another jolt of adrenaline passes through you. Wolves?!'
+				'Suddenly, you hear a terrifying howl close behind you. Another jolt of adrenaline passes through you. Wolves?!'
 
 				act 'Run away':
 					*clr & cla
 					'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/locations/gadukino/forest/run_wolf.jpg"></center>'
-					'You turn to help <<$pcs_nickname>> just in time to see a wolf knock her down, its fangs clamped down on her neck. A gush of crimson blood sprays the jaws of the wolf as you look on in shock. You hear the sound of rustling brush and in panic try to escape, but almost immediately you feel something heavy crash into you from behind and knock you down.'
+					'You turn to help <<$pcs_nickname>> just in time to see a wolf knock her to the ground. She screams in fear and reaches out to you before the wolf sinks its fangs into her neck, her blood spraying over the wolf as she helplessly gurgles and chokes on it. You look on in shock before hearing the sound of rustling brush and try to escape, but almost immediately feel something heavy crash into you from behind and knock you down.'
 					act 'Lash out':
 						*clr & cla
 						'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/locations/gadukino/forest/wolf.jpg"></center>'
-						'You panic and lash backwards with your hands, causing the wolf attacking you to spring backwards out of range. Yet another wolf rushes in from the side, tearing into your shoulder.'
+						'You panic and lash out with your hands, causing the wolf attacking you to spring backwards out of range. Yet another wolf rushes in from the side, tearing into your shoulder.'
 
 						act 'Scream in pain':
 							*clr & cla
 							'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/locations/gadukino/forest/gadforest_night2.jpg"></center>'
-							'You let out a scream of pain, every thought being buried under the wild panic of adrenaline. You try to get up to run, but a pair of jaws bites deep into your thigh, sending you to the ground.'
+							'You let out a scream of pain, every thought being buried under the wild panic of adrenaline. You try to get up to run, but a pair of jaws bites deep into your thigh, sending you to the ground. You catch a brief glimpse of the blood soaked wolf tearing into <<$pcs_nickname>>''s corpse. There is a look of immense terror in her now dead eyes.'
 
 							act 'Oh god...':
 								*clr & cla
 								'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/system/1_openings/4_csb/11.jpg"></center>'
-								'Shock and blood loss set in, causing your vision to start to black out. So this is how you die. Moments before you pass out, you swear you can hear the sound crunching bones from above you and see a flash of red hair.'
-
+								'Shock and blood loss set in, causing your vision to start to black out. So this is how you die. Moments before you pass out, you swear you can hear the sound of crunching bones and see a flash of bright red hair.'
 								act '...am I dying?': gt 'intro_sg_tg', 'intro_9'
 							end
 						end
@@ -464,11 +455,11 @@ end
 
 if $ARGS[0] = 'intro_9':
 	*clr & cla
-	!!background: black
-	bcolor = rgb(0, 0, 0)
-	lcolor = rgb(106, 90, 205)
-	fcolor = rgb(255, 255, 255)
-
+	!!background : black
+	bcolor = rgb (0,0,0)
+	lcolor = rgb (106, 90, 205)
+	fcolor = rgb (255, 255, 255)
+	
 	'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/system/1_openings/4_csb/11.jpg"></center>'
 	'...'
 	wait 1500
@@ -478,11 +469,10 @@ if $ARGS[0] = 'intro_9':
 	*nl
 	'...'
 	wait 1500
-	*nl
 	'...'
 	wait 1500
 	*nl
-	'Darkness consumes your thoughts for some time. Eventually, images begin to form in your mind and you soon find yourself in the middle of a dream. The strange amulet stands before you and out of it comes a ghost of some sort. Before you even realize what you are doing, you find yourself staring deep into the ghost''s eyes, which then turn into two planet earths.'
+	'Darkness consumes your thoughts for some time. Eventually, images begin to form in your mind and you soon find yourself in the middle of a dream. The strange amulet stands before you and out of it comes a ghost of some sort. Before you even realize what you are doing, you find yourself staring deep into the ghost''s eyes, which turn into two Earths.'
 	'"Most who look at the world see only the mundane, but there is more to it. Much more. Now you see that too. You have the potential to shape it all, but first, you have company."'
 
 	act 'Wake up':
@@ -493,39 +483,38 @@ if $ARGS[0] = 'intro_9':
 		fcolor = rgb(0, 0, 0)
 		'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/system/1_openings/shared/npc_tatiana.jpg"></center>'
 		'You open your eyes to see you are in a hospital room. Next to you is an unfamiliar red-haired girl.'
-		'"Ah, you woke up," she chirped. "We found you half-dead, you know. You almost didn''t make it. There wasn''t anything that I could do for the girl though. Those wolves really did a number on the two of you. Running half-exhausted through the forest must have made you a pretty tempting target. Then again, given how you picked up that amulet, you probably wouldn''t have lasted much longer even if you had managed to get away."'
+		'"Ah, you woke up," she chirps. "We found you half-dead, you know. You almost didn''t make it. There wasn''t anything that I could do for the girl though. Those wolves really did a number on the two of you. Running half-exhausted through the forest must have made you a pretty tempting target. Then again, given how you picked up that amulet, you probably wouldn''t have lasted much longer, even if you had managed to get away."'
 
 		act 'What? Who? Where?':
 			*clr & cla
-
 			'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/system/1_openings/shared/npc_tatiana.jpg"></center>'
-			'You try to ask her all the questions running through your mind right now. Unfortunately all that comes out of your mouth is a croaking groan. Your tongue feels half-numb, as does the rest of your body. Your head is too fuzzy at the moment to think straight.'
+			'You try to ask her all the questions running through your mind right now. Unfortunately all that comes out of your mouth is a croaking groan. Your tongue feels half-numb, as does the rest of your body. Your head is too fuzzy to think straight.'
 			'"I''d take it easy right now. I managed to save you, but your body still needs to get used to the change."'
 
 			act 'What change?':
 				*clr & cla
 				'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/system/1_openings/shared/npc_tatiana.jpg"></center>'
 				'"What change?" You manage to get those words out, though your voice sounds a lot higher than normal.'
-				'The girl points at your chest, "Take a look for yourself."'
+				'The girl points at your chest. "Take a look for yourself."'
 
 				act 'Look down':
 					*clr & cla
 					'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/system/1_openings/4_csb/12.jpg"></center>'
 					'You look down, hair longer than it was yesterday shifting in front of your eyes. The covers of the hospital bed lie flat over your body, but they cover a far different shape than you are used to.'
-					'You whip back the covers and the front-open hospital gown to discover a pair of naked breasts in front of your face. Past them lie the smooth curves of a teenage girl. An empty feeling between your legs informs you that your old friend has gone missing.'
+					'You whip back the covers and the front-open hospital gown to discover a pair of naked breasts and the smooth curves of a teenage girl. An empty feeling between your legs informs you that your old friend has gone missing.'
 					'You hastily recover your body in a panic, turning to the girl at your bedside.'
 
 					act 'What did you do to me?!':
 						*clr & cla
 						'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/system/1_openings/shared/npc_tatiana.jpg"></center>'
-						'The girl frowns at your tone. "<i´>I</i> saved your life. Twice, even. You shouldn''t run off into the woods at night, let alone be fondling ancient amulets you know nothing about. Especially something like the Amulet of Power. Turns out that it passed to you. Must have happened when you touched it."'
+						'The girl frowns at your tone. "<i>I</i> saved your life. Twice, even. You shouldn''t run off into the woods at night, let alone be fondling ancient amulets you know nothing about. Especially something like the Amulet of Power. Turns out that it passed to you. Must have happened when you touched it."'
 
 						act 'What''s going on?':
 							*clr & cla
 							'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/system/1_openings/shared/npc_tatiana.jpg"></center>'
 							'"What the hell is going on?" you respond. "What does that have to do with turning me into a girl?!"'
-							'"Hold on, I''ll get around to that. Let me start from the beginning," the girl says. "Magic exists and is real. Ages ago the world was not the same, the fae creatures who possess natural magic lived in balance but the succubus were free to breed with whom ever they wished."'
-							'"They bred with humans and with that human magicians were born. The Sidhe, the most powerful of the fae, feared the increasing numbers of human magicians and cast a very powerful spell to bind the succubus to them, preventing either from being able to reproduce without the other."'
+							'"Hold on, I''ll get to that. Let me start from the beginning," the girl says. "Magic exists and is real. Millenia ago, the world was not the same. The fae creatures who possess natural magic lived in balance, but the succubus were free to breed with whomever they wished."'
+							'"They bred with humans, and with that human magicians were born. The Sidhe, the most powerful of the fae, feared the increasing number of human magicians and cast a very powerful spell to bind the succubus to them, preventing either from being able to reproduce without the other."'
 							'"All magicians have some of that original fae blood in their bodies. It is through that that they are able to connect with the world of magic."'
 							'The redhead adjusts her glasses. "Most of the world simply ignores magic, or are protected from it by magic''s natural desire to remain hidden."'
 
@@ -533,29 +522,29 @@ if $ARGS[0] = 'intro_9':
 								*clr & cla
 								'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/system/1_openings/shared/npc_tatiana.jpg"></center>'
 								'"But last night there was a powerful burst of magical energy, strong enough to be clearly felt by any with magical connections. Can you guess where this surge came from? Yeah, that cave you found. Apparently the surge occurred when you opened the seal to the archive. Anyway, that was when we started to search. That source of power is desired by many, but it is extremely dangerous and in the wrong hands could cause untold horrors."'
-								'She stops for a few moments for you to process that information. It seems really far fetched.'
+								'She stops for a few seconds for you to process that information. It seems really far fetched.'
 								'"A man named Reinhold wanted to prevent the amulet being misused, so he went out to find it. Of course, the moment you saw him, you dropped the amulet and bolted into the woods. He picked it up but didn''t bother to check you over. Unfortunately, he''s probably realized by now that the amulet no longer has the power and now he''ll be out to hunt you down."'
 
 								act 'So, the whole world is just an illusion?':
 									*clr & cla
 									'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/system/1_openings/shared/npc_tatiana.jpg"></center>'
-									'"So magic exists and is used by all these people and creatures. But the rest of us just don''t see it, or we convince ourselves it didn''t happen?" You ask.'
-									'The girl nods. "Yes. You''re a quick study. Machines, apartments, television and the Internet, all this really does exist and is in the form in which people see it. But if I say, hurl a fireball, then people might see that I threw a grenade or shot a flamethrower. The average human mind can''t process magic, so it blocks it out as a way to protect the person from going crazy."'
-									'"Hence such things as little green men, UFOs, poltergeists, and spontaneous combustion are from when people encounter a difficult-to-hide phenomenon and their minds come to a flawed conclusion. In some cases, a person''s mind can''t cope with the spell they witness and they are driven so crazy that no one believes them."'
+									'"So magic exists and is used by all these people and creatures. But the rest of us just don''t see it, or we convince ourselves it didn''t happen?"'
+									'The girl nods. "Yes. You''re a quick study. Machines, apartments, television and the Internet. All this really does exist and is in the form in which people see it. But if I say, hurl a fireball, then people might see that I threw a grenade or shot a flamethrower. The average human mind can''t process magic, so it blocks it out as a way to protect the person from going crazy."'
+									'"Hence such things as little green men, UFOs, poltergeists and spontaneous combustion are from when people encounter a difficult-to-hide phenomenon and their minds come to a flawed conclusion. In some cases, a person''s mind can''t cope with the spell they witness and they are driven insane."'
 
 									act 'And who are you?':
 										*clr & cla
 										'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/system/1_openings/shared/npc_tatiana.jpg"></center>'
 										'"And who are you?" you ask.'
-										'The girl smiled. "Me? I''m Tatiana, a young mage with an keen interest in magical phenomenon. I specialize in the treatment of mutations, and magic relating to the body. I have little combat skill, so I rely on the services of Gustav to provide some muscle. He''s a Mutant due to magical exposure. It gives him unmatched physical strength, plus he''s a great tracker."'
+										'The girl smiles. "Me? I''m Tatiana, a young mage with a keen interest in magical phenomenon. I specialize in the treatment of mutations, and magic relating to the body. I have little combat skill, so I rely on the services of Gustav to provide some muscle. He''s a Mutant due to magical exposure. It gives him unmatched physical strength, plus he''s a great tracker."'
 										'"The two of us run a detective agency for cover and money, but our real objective is studying magic and its effects."'
 
 										act 'What do you want from me?':
 											*clr & cla
 											'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/system/1_openings/shared/npc_tatiana.jpg"></center>'
 											'"And what is this amulet? Where did it come from?" you ask.'
-											'Tatiana thinks about it for a few moments. "It was made by the trickster Rikudo, one of the most powerful ancient magicians. He taunted the only living mage who could control its immense power by cursing him to be stuck in a female form, yet making it only activate for a male mage."'
-											'"I''m not a mage though, how could the power be transferred to me? And what does that have to do with turning me into a girl?"'
+											'Tatiana thinks about it for a few seconds. "It was made by the trickster Rikudo, one of the most powerful ancient magicians. He taunted the only living mage who could control its immense power by cursing him to be stuck in a female form, yet making it only activate for a male mage."'
+											'"I''m not a mage though. How could the power be transferred to me? And what does that have to do with turning me into a girl?"'
 											'"Well as for how the power was transferred, it seems that its long time underground caused it to malfunction and its power to enter your body. It was far too powerful for your body and would have ended up killing you and who knows how many others. Which is where the ''turning you into a girl'' part comes in."'
 
 											act 'Continue':
@@ -568,42 +557,35 @@ if $ARGS[0] = 'intro_9':
 												act 'Continue':
 													*clr & cla
 													'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/system/1_openings/shared/npc_tatiana.jpg"></center>'
-													'"Of course there was another way. I could have just stopped your heart and let your power dissolve into nature. You would have died though. Reinhold might be the kind of person to kill you to save others, but I didn''t want to kill you right after saving you. Plus with my magic I was able to take this risk. Sure, maybe with more time doing research I could have worked out another solution, but I didn''t have a lot of time."'
-													'"Of course I couldn''t just leave a newly teenage girl without parents or a home. So I decided to kill two birds with one stone. Instead of just turning you into the girl version of you, I turned you into that girl you were with."'
+													'"Of course there was another way. I could have just stopped your heart and let your power dissolve into nature. You would have died though. Reinhold might be the kind of person to kill you to save others, but I didn''t want to kill you right after saving you. Plus, with my magic, I was able to take this risk. Sure, maybe with more time doing research I could have worked out another solution, but I didn''t have a lot of time."'
+													'"Of course I couldn''t just leave a newly created teenage girl without parents or a home. So I decided to kill two birds with one stone. Instead of just turning you into any old girl, I turned you into the girl you were with."'
 
 													act 'What?':
 														*clr & cla
 														'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/system/1_openings/shared/npc_tatiana.jpg"></center>'
-														'Startled, you reach up to your face, tracing out the features. You didn''t get a chance to become familiar with her face, but it feels about right. This whole time, the death of <<$pcs_nickname>> didn''t feel real, like she was still around somehow. Maybe it''s because you now "are" <<$pcs_nickname>>, but even now you don''t feel a sense of loss or guilt.'
+														'Startled, you reach up to your face, tracing out the features. You didn''t get a chance to become familiar with her face, but it feels about right. This whole time, <<$pcs_nickname>>''s death didn''t feel real, like she was still around somehow. Maybe it''s because you now <i>are<i> <<$pcs_nickname>>, but even now you don''t feel a sense of loss or guilt.'
 														'"Having a template to work off of really helped. Not even a geneticist could tell you two apart; you are identical from your fingerprints down to your DNA. Of course, that means your new ''equipment'' down there is fully functional as well, so if you don''t want to be a mommy, you should start thinking about contraceptives. You should probably also stay away from any male relatives if you don''t want to end up with a kid with eleven toes or something."'
-														'You angrily look at Tatiana, "So you think I''m a complete woman? On the outside I''ll look like one, but guess what, I''m still a man!"'
+														'You angrily glare at Tatiana. "So you think I''m a girl now? On the outside maybe, but guess what? I''m still a boy on the inside!"'
 														'"Well, yes. I won''t argue about that." Tatiana agrees. "You can decide what you want to do with your life, but you might want to play the part of <<$pcs_firstname>> until graduation at least. On a side note, I already took care of an alibi. Yesterday, "<<$pcs_firstname>>" was found half-dead on the edge of the woods while the leftovers of Mikhail''s body were found deeper in. It''s in the news." With these words, she tosses a newspaper onto the bed, an article circled out.'
 
 														act 'Read the newspaper':
 															*clr & cla
 															'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/system/1_openings/4_csb/13.jpg"></center>'
 															'There is a news report about a teenage boy, whose remains were found by a group of hunters half-eaten by wolves.'
-															'You give Tatiana a bewildered look. She has an enigmatic smile, "Well, I am a magician. That''s something that I can do. Reinhold has definitely lost the trail; there''s no reason he should suspect the power been passed to a girl. You took <<$pcs_firstname>>''s place, and she took yours. The body that ''died'' in the woods was a perfect copy of your old self, from your absorbed amulet energy down to the placement of every single hair."'
-															'"Anyways, your ''mother'' will be by in a couple hours to pick you up; she thinks that you''ve got some amnesia from a head injury and mental trauma from seeing your ''boyfriend'' get eaten alive by wolves, so you should probably be covered for any slip-ups. Just play the part of the traumatized little schoolgirl and it should be all good. Have fun."'
-															'She gets up and heads to the door, opening it up to reveal a tall man with red hair and face tattoos. "Come on, Gustav, let''s go." The pair disappears into the hall, leaving you with your thoughts.'
+															'You give Tatiana a bewildered stare. She has an enigmatic smile on her face. "Well, I am a magician. That''s something that I can do. Reinhold has definitely lost the trail; there''s no reason he should suspect the power been passed to a girl. You took <<$pcs_firstname>>''s place, and she took yours. The body in the woods was a perfect copy of your old self, from your absorbed amulet energy down to the placement of every single hair."'
+															'"Anyways, your ''mother'' will be by in a few hours to pick you up; she thinks that you''ve got some amnesia from a head injury and mental trauma from seeing your ''boyfriend'' get eaten alive by wolves, so you should probably be covered for any slip-ups. Just play the part of the traumatized little schoolgirl and it should be all good. Have fun."'
+															'She gets up and heads to the door, opening it up to reveal a tall man with red hair and face tattoos. "Come on, Gustav, let''s go." The pair disappear into the hall, leaving you with your thoughts.'
 
 															act 'Think about your situation':
 																*clr & cla
 																'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/system/1_openings/4_csb/14.jpg"></center>'
 																'You aren''t sure what to think.'
 																'On the one hand, you''ve lost your manhood forever. You''ll have to deal with skirts and periods and makeup and babies and all other sorts of girly things.'
-																'On the other hand, you''ve been granted a clean slate. No more beatings, no threats of becoming homeless, and you are gaining the family you never had. Plus, you''re going to be able to spy on girls in the locker rooms with out girls screaming this time.'
+																'On the other, you''ve been granted a clean slate. No more beatings, no threats of becoming homeless, and you''re gaining the family you never had. Plus, you''re going to be able to spy on girls in the locker room without them screaming this time.'
 																'Whining about the situation isn''t going to change it, so you resolve to deal with it one day at a time, living your new life as <<$pcs_firstname>> "<<$pcs_nickname>>" <<$pcs_lastname>>.'
-
-																act 'Continue':
-																	*clr & cla
-																	'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/system/1_openings/4_csb/start_csb.jpg"></center>'
-																	'Welcome to the Cursed Schoolboy version! You may have lost your masculinity and your old life, but you''ve gained new possibilities in return! Will you try to live your new life as a mere schoolgirl, or do you have grander aspirations with your newfound knowledge of magic? The choice is yours!'
-
-
-																	!!This is the default start
-																	act 'Start at the end of August':
-																		month = 8
+																!! default start
+																act 'Start at the end of August':
+																	month = 8
 																		$month = 'August'
 																		grandmaQW['last_month_paid'] = month
 																		day = 26
@@ -624,7 +606,7 @@ if $ARGS[0] = 'intro_9':
 																		dostupindorf = 1
 																		gt 'intro_sg_tg', 'intro_end'
 																	end
-																end
+																end	
 															end
 														end
 													end
@@ -659,7 +641,7 @@ if $ARGS[0] = 'pav_start':
 	'<center><h2>Pavlovsk</h2></center>'
 	'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/system/1_openings/shared/site_pavlovsk.jpg"></center>'
 	*nl
-	'<center>A provincial town in a rural area of Russia, it looks much like all the other towns in the region. Population: about 15000 inhabitants. This is where you live with your parents, it is ideal if you are due back to school but it might be a bit boring to spend all summer here.</center>'
+	'<center>A provincial town in a rural area of Russia, which looks much like all the other towns in the region. Population: 15000.</center>'
 
 	act 'Continue': $starting_location = 'pavlovsk' & gt 'intro_sg_tg', 'game_start'
 	act 'Change location': gt 'intro_sg_tg', 'gad_start'
@@ -670,7 +652,7 @@ if $ARGS[0] = 'gad_start':
 	'<center><h2>Gadukino</h2></center>'
 	'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/system/1_openings/shared/site_pavlovsk.jpg"></center>'
 	*nl
-	'<center>A small farming village with many rickety wooden houses and even more ruins of houses. This village has seen better times. It might be a good place to spend your summer holidays but it is not convenient if you are due to return to school.</center>'
+	'<center>A small farming village with just as many rickety wooden houses dot the landscape as ruins. The village has seen better days.</center>'
 
 	act 'Continue': $starting_location = 'gadukino' & gt 'intro_sg_tg', 'game_start'
 	act 'Change location': gt 'intro_sg_tg', 'pav_start'
@@ -679,7 +661,7 @@ end
 if $ARGS[0] = 'game_start':
 	*clr & cla
 	'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/characters/pavlovsk/resident/mom/mother.jpg"></center>'
-	'Shortly after Tatiana left, your new mother showed up to take you to your new home. You met your new family and did the best you could to fit in, afraid of them figuring out that you are not <<$pcs_firstname>>. They seem to have bought Tatiana''s explanation of amnesia and mental trauma, going out of their way to reintroduce you to your new life.'
+	'Shortly after Tatiana left, your new mother showed up to take you to your new home. You met your new family and did the best you could to fit in, afraid of them figuring out that you''re not <<$pcs_firstname>>. They seem to have bought Tatiana''s explanation of amnesia and mental trauma, going out of their way to reintroduce you to your new life.'
 
 	act 'Continue':
 		*clr & cla
@@ -703,7 +685,6 @@ if $ARGS[0] = 'game_start':
 				showstat 1
 				showobjs 1
 				gs 'obj_din', 'old'
-
 				!!Stuff from the backpack, phone
 				prezik = 3
 				pornMagazine = 40

+ 48 - 48
locations/intro_uni.qsrc

@@ -16,8 +16,8 @@ if $ARGS[0] = 'start':
 	$loc_arg = 'custom'
 	*clr & cla
 	'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/locations/city/island/university/uni_day.jpg"></center>'
-	'The big day has finally arrived! Your family piled into your stepfather''s Gazelle pickup and you all traveled from your hometown, Pavlovsk, to the big city of St. Petersburg. Today is the day you move into the University dorms to start this new phase of your life.'
-	'As you approach the city you thing back to your school days and recall what type of kid you were...'
+	'The big day has finally arrived! Your family piled into your stepfather''s Gazelle pickup and you all traveled from your hometown, Pavlovsk, to St. Petersburg. Today is the day you move into the university dorms to start this new phase of your life.'
+	'As you approach the city, you think back to your school days and recall what type of kid you were...'
 
 	act 'Continue': gt 'intro_city_select', 'start'
 end
@@ -30,7 +30,7 @@ if $ARGS[0] = 'custom':
 	'<center><b><font color = maroon>CHARACTER CUSTOMIZATION</font></b></center>'
 	'<center><b>Allows you to alter hair and eyes, use to match fixed profile picture if in use.</b></center>'
 	'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/system/1_openings/shared/character_creation_2.jpg"></center>'
-	'As you look in the mirror, your face comes into focus. Some aspects of your appearance are already set, you can define the others now.'
+	'As you look in the mirror, your face comes into focus. While some aspects of your appearance are already set, you can define the others now.'
 	'You are fairly tall.'
 	*nl
 	'<center>Customize your:</center>'
@@ -44,8 +44,8 @@ if $ARGS[0] = 'vlad_intro':
 	*clr & cla
 	'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/characters/shared/headshots_main/big28.jpg"></center>'
 	!!basic desc of Vlad, maybe a preset is used somewhere in game already? If not already in the intro (I think it is.)
-	'Having spent almost an hour in the cramped truck, you jump out as soon as you arrive. Vlad gets out, stretches a bit, then tells you to take your sister and find out where you''re staying, while the rest of the family unloads your stuff from the back of the truck.'
-	'Looking around, you see many people doing the same, the younger ones heading inside while the families unload the future students belongings to be taken inside.'
+	'Having spent almost an hour in the cramped truck, you jump out as soon as you arrive. Vladimir gets out and stretches before telling you to take your sister and find out where you''re staying while the rest of the family unloads your stuff.'
+	'Looking around, you see many people doing the same.'
 
 	act 'Check Kolka': gt 'intro_uni', 'kolka_intro'
 end
@@ -55,7 +55,7 @@ if $ARGS[0] = 'kolka_intro':
 	*clr & cla
 	'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/characters/shared/headshots_main/big34.jpg"></center>'
 	!!basic desc of Kolka, maybe a preset is used somewhere in game already? If not already in the intro (I think it is.)
-	'Your brother, caught up in the excitement of opening day, tries to slide past Vlad unnoticed but is called back to help unload. He sighs and shuffles his feet a bit before turning around to help his dad get your stuff. You feel a bit bad for him, but he will be able to get a better look around next year, when he graduates secondary school and starts here.'
+	'Your brother, caught up in the excitement of opening day, tries to slide past Vlad unnoticed but is called back to help unload. He sighs and shuffles his feet before turning around to help. You feel bad for him, but he''ll be able to get a better look around next year when he graduates secondary school and starts here.'
 
 	act 'Head inside': gt 'intro_uni', 'anya_intro'
 end
@@ -66,24 +66,24 @@ if $ARGS[0] = 'anya_intro':
 	'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/characters/shared/headshots_main/big33.jpg"></center>'
 	!!basic desc of Anya, maybe a preset is used somewhere in game already? If not already in the intro (I think it is.)
 	'Your sister comes up to you, links her arm with yours, and pulls you forward. "Come on, <<$pcs_nickname>>! I want to see this place."'
-	'Already knowing the answer, you ask anyway "Why aren''t you enrolled then?"'
+	'Already knowing the answer, you ask anyway. "Why aren''t you enrolled then?"'
 	'"I''m comfortable where I am right now. When I''m ready, maybe I will."'
 	'Rolling your eyes, you let her keep pulling on your arm.'
 
-	act 'Enter the University': gt 'intro_uni', 'diane_intro'
+	act 'Enter the university': gt 'intro_uni', 'diane_intro'
 end
 
 if $ARGS[0] = 'diane_intro':
 	!! Going into Uni quad to get escort - meeting Diane(Rex older sister)
 	*clr & cla
 	'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/characters/shared/headshots_main/big253.jpg"></center>'
-	'Joining the crowd heading inside, you and Anya go into the main courtyard where the new students are being greeted by the older students.'
+	'Joining the crowd heading inside, you head into the main courtyard where the new students are being greeted by the older students.'
 	'A (color undecided)-haired girl comes up and introduces herself. "Welcome, I am Diane Borisyuk... Anya?"'
-	'Anya squeals with joy and runs to her and gives her a big hug. "Diane! I haven''t seen you in a long time. <<$pcs_nickname>>, this is Diane, Rex''s sister. She used to buy us booze for our parties when we were younger."'
-	'Diane laughs and says "that <b>was</b> a long time ago. So this is your sister? Nice to meet you. You''re going to have a lot of fun here. Let''s get you your dorm keys and get you set up!"'
+	'Anya squeals with joy before running to her and giving her a hug. "Diane! I haven''t seen you in a long time. <<$pcs_nickname>>, this is Diane, Rex''s sister. She used to buy us booze for our parties when we were younger."'
+	'Diane laughs. "That <b>was</b> a long time ago. So this is your sister? Nice to meet you. You''re going to have a lot of fun here. Let''s get you your dorm keys and get you set up!"'
 	'"By the way, what are you studying?"'
 
-	act 'Go get your key': gt 'intro_uni', 'degree_choice'
+	act 'Get your key': gt 'intro_uni', 'degree_choice'
 end
 
 if $ARGS[0] = 'degree_choice':
@@ -97,7 +97,7 @@ if $ARGS[0] = 'degree_choice':
 	gs 'set_home', 11
 	*clr & cla
 	'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/system/1_openings/6_uni/degree_choice.jpg"></center>'
-	'This is where you decide your degree. For now this is just a placeholder to be expanded once we add in more degrees to choose from.'
+	'This is where you decide what degree you wish to study. For now, Teaching is the only option, but more will be added in the future.'
 	
 	act 'Teaching':
 		!!variables for teaching degree
@@ -117,23 +117,23 @@ if $ARGS[0] = 'dorm_intro':
 	!! Going to the dorm to get the keys
 	*clr & cla
 	'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/locations/city/island/university/dorm/dorm.jpg"></center>'
-	'You follow Diane into the dorms building into the main hallway. An older woman, with a very unpleasant and judgmental look on her face sits in a room just off the main hallway.'
-	'Diane goes up to her and says "I need <<$pcs_firstname>> <<$pcs_lastname>>''s room key, please."'
-	'The woman looks your name up on her computer then finds your dorm key and hands it to you.'
+	'You follow Diane into the dorm building where an older woman with a very unpleasant and judgmental look on her face sits in a room just off the main hallway.'
+	'Diane walks up to her. "I need <<$pcs_firstname>> <<$pcs_lastname>>''s room key, please."'
+	'The woman looks your name up on her computer before finding your dorm key and handing it to you.'
 	'"Come on <<$pcs_nickname>>, I want to see your room." Anya drags you towards the elevators, with a smiling Diane following you.'
 
-	act 'Check your room': gt 'intro_uni', 'vika_intro'
+	act 'Check out your room': gt 'intro_uni', 'vika_intro'
 end
 
 if $ARGS[0] = 'vika_intro':
 	!! Visiting dorm room - meeting Vika
 	*clr & cla
 	'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/characters/shared/headshots_main/big220.jpg"></center>'
-	'Getting out of the elevator on the tenth floor, you follow the number on your key to the door with the same number. Inside you find a blonde haired girl sitting on one of the two beds in the room. Looking around, you see there is a desk for each of you and a large wardrobe for your clothes.'
-	'The girl gets up and comes to greet you. "Hi, I''m Vika Kirilova. I guess one of you is my new roommate?" She looks between you and Anya, not sure which it is.'
-	'"Hello, Vika. I am <<$pcs_firstname>> <<$pcs_lastname>>. I''m your roommate, this is my sister, Anya." Anya gives her a smile and say hello, mostly checking out your room.'
-	'Diane kind of stays in the doorway, though you do notice a strange look she gives Vika before saying, "We should let your parents know which room you''re in so they can bring in your stuff, while I show you around the campus."'
-	'Once you get back out into the hallway, you ask why she doesn''t like your roommate. "There are a lot of nasty rumors about her. I am not exactly a prude or anything, but if any of those rumors are true, then she makes me look like a virgin living under a rock my whole life."'
+	'Arriving on the tenth floor, you check the number on your key and approach the matching door. You find a blonde haired girl inside sitting on one of the two beds in the room. Looking around, you see there is a desk for each of you and a large wardrobe for your clothes.'
+	'The girl gets up and comes to greet you. "Hi, I''m Vika Kirilova. I guess one of you is my new roommate?" She looks between you and Anya, not sure who it is.'
+	'"Hello, Vika. I''m <<$pcs_firstname>> <<$pcs_lastname>>, but you can call me <<$pcs_nickname>>. I''m your roommate and this is my sister, Anya." Anya gives her a smile, but is mostly occupied with checking out your room.'
+	'Diane stays in the doorway, though you do notice the strange look she gives Vika. "We should let your parents know which room you''re in so they can drop off your stuff while I show you around the campus."'
+	'Once you get back out into the hallway, you ask why she doesn''t like your roommate. "There are a lot of nasty rumors about her. I''m not exactly a prude or anything, but if any of those rumors are true, then she makes me look like a virgin that''s been living under a rock my whole life."'
 
 	act 'Find your parents': gt 'intro_uni', 'mom_intro'
 end
@@ -142,37 +142,37 @@ if $ARGS[0] = 'mom_intro':
 	!! Back outside Intro to Mom - answer sets relationship level
 	*clr & cla
 	'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/characters/shared/headshots_main/big29.jpg"></center>'
-	'Once you get back outside, you find your family standing around the piles of boxes with your stuff, surrounded by people coming and going. You tell your father which room and give him the key before your <<$npc_nickname[''A29'']>> pulls you to one side. Anya and Diane step away to catch up a bit and give you some privacy.'
+	'Once you get back outside, you find your family standing around the piles of boxes with your stuff, surrounded by people coming and going. You tell your father which room you''re in and give him the key before your <<$npc_nickname[''A29'']>> pulls you to one side. Anya and Diane step away to catch up and give you some privacy.'
 	'"Big day! Are you excited? I know I am." She gives you a proud look.'
-	'"Yeah, <<$npc_nickname[''A29'']>>! There is so much to do and see here."'
-	'"Well don''t forget to stay focused on your studies, and stay away from boys for now. There is plenty of time after you have finished school to think about that stuff."'
+	'"Yeah, <<$npc_nickname[''A29'']>>! There''s so much to do and see here."'
+	'"Well don''t forget to stay focused on your studies, and stay away from boys for now. There will be plenty of time after you''ve finished studying to think about that stuff."'
 	
-	act 'I will be fine (neutral response)':
+	act 'I''ll be fine':
 		gs 'npc_relationship', 'set', 'A29', '50'
 		*clr & cla
 		'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/characters/shared/headshots_main/big29.jpg"></center>'
 		'"Everything will be fine, <<$npc_nickname[''A29'']>>. You got me here, I will do the rest."'
-		'She gives you a hug before going to stand over your pile of stuff to keep an eye on it.'
+		'She gives you a hug before going to stand over at your pile of stuff to keep an eye on it.'
 		
 		act 'Go on tour': gt 'intro_uni', 'tour_intro'
 	end
-	act 'Give it a rest (angry response)':
+	act 'Give it a rest':
 		gs 'npc_relationship', 'set', 'A29', '30'
 		*clr & cla
 		'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/characters/shared/headshots_main/big29.jpg"></center>'
-		'"Just stop <<$npc_nickname[''A29'']>>! I''m an adult now, and I will do whatever I want with who I want!"'
+		'"Just stop <<$npc_nickname[''A29'']>>! I''m an adult now, and I''ll do whatever I want with whoever I want!"'
 		'Her eyes flash in anger, but she doesn''t say anything. She goes and stands next to your pile to keep an eye on it.'
 		
 		act 'Go on tour': gt 'intro_uni', 'tour_intro'
 	end
-	act 'Don''t worry (loving response)':
+	act 'Don''t worry':
 		gs 'npc_relationship', 'set', 'A29', '70'
 		*clr & cla
 		'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/characters/shared/headshots_main/big29.jpg"></center>'
-		'"I know, don''t worry so much <<$npc_nickname[''A29'']>>. You got me here, I will do the rest."'
-		'She gives you a big hug before going to stand over your pile of stuff to keep an eye on it.'
+		'"I know, I know. Don''t worry so much <<$npc_nickname[''A29'']>>. You got me here. I''ll do the rest."'
+		'She gives you a hug before going to stand over your pile of stuff to keep an eye on it.'
 
-		act 'Go on tour': gt 'intro_uni', 'tour_intro'
+		act 'Go on a tour': gt 'intro_uni', 'tour_intro'
 	end
 end
 
@@ -180,14 +180,14 @@ if $ARGS[0] = 'tour_intro':
 	!! Taking a short tour - can be expanded as more buildings are added - sports arena/pool etc
 	*clr & cla
 	'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/locations/city/island/university/uni_day.jpg"></center>'
-	'You rejoin Anya and Diane, who begins to point out the main areas of the University.'
-	'"Right now you''re in the main courtyard. Most places can be found starting here. You already know where the dorms are, and I imagine you been to the admin building already, where you enrolled. Any paperwork stuff, or trouble you get into will be handled there, it has all the offices."'
+	'You rejoin Anya and Diane, who begins to point out the main areas of the university.'
+	'"Right now you''re in the main courtyard. It''s basically the main hub of the university. You already know where the dorms are, and I imagine you''ve been to the admin building already. It has all the main offices, so any paperwork or trouble you get into will be handled there."'
 	*nl
-	'She takes you to the front of what must be the largest building on campus. "Most of your starting classes will be here, finding your way around inside is pretty easy despite its size, there are signs everywhere in there."'
+	'She takes you to the front of what must be the largest building on campus. "This is the main building, where most of your classes will be held. Finding your way around inside is pretty easy despite its size. It''s signposted like crazy in there."'
 	*nl
-	'She takes you up to another large building, and says "This is the library. Most students without a computer come here to study. You can find me inside a lot, I''m studying to be a teacher and I would be happy to help if you need it."'
+	'She takes you up to another large building. "This is the library. Most students without a computer come here to study. You can find me here almost all the time and I''m always willing to help if you need it. I''m studying to be a teacher, so offering you assistance would help me as much as it helps you."'
 	*nl
-	'"Well that''s the basic tour, the rest you will find as you go."'
+	'"Well, that''s the basic tour. The rest you will learn as you go."'
 
 	act 'End the tour': gt 'intro_uni', 'tour_end'
 end
@@ -196,9 +196,9 @@ if $ARGS[0] = 'tour_end':
 	!! End tour
 	*clr & cla
 	'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/characters/shared/headshots_main/big253.jpg"></center>'
-	'The three of you walk back to the dorms, with you taking in the sights while Anya and Diane chat about Rex and the old days.'
+	'The three of you walk back to the dorms. You take in the sights while Anya and Diane chat about Rex and the old days.'
 	'Once you get there, Diane reminds you to look for her in the library if you need anything before hugging Anya goodbye and heading back into the crowd of new students.'
-	'Not seeing your <<$npc_nickname[''A29'']>> or your pile of stuff, you head up to your room on the tenth floor.'
+	'Not seeing your <<$npc_nickname[''A29'']>> or your pile of stuff, you head up to your room.'
 
 	act 'Say goodbye to your family': gt 'intro_uni', 'family_goodbye'
 end
@@ -207,18 +207,18 @@ if $ARGS[0] = 'family_goodbye':
 	!! Say goodbye to your family
 	*clr & cla
 	'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/locations/city/island/university/dorm/dorm_room/room.jpg"></center>'
-	'Inside you find your stuff piled on your bed and your <<$npc_nickname[''A29'']>> putting the last of your clothes into the wardrobe. You don''t see Vika, she must have left to give privacy or to avoid meeting them.'
-	'Anya gives a big hug, congratulates you on starting university, and then steps back to give the rest of your family room to do the same. Your brother gives you an awkward hug and whispers to text him what it''s like before stepping back too.'
-	'Vladimir comes over and hugs you too, tells you how proud he is to be your stepfather and to call if you need anything.'
+	'Returing to your room, you find your stuff piled on your bed and your <<$npc_nickname[''A29'']>> putting the last of your clothes into the wardrobe. You don''t see Vika, and assume she left to give you privacy or to avoid meeting your family.'
+	'Anya gives a hug and congratulates you on starting university while your brother gives you an awkward hug and whispers to text him what it''s like.'
+	'Vladimir comes over and hugs you too, telling you how proud he is to be your stepfather and to call if you need anything.'
 	if npc_rel['A29'] >= 60:
-		'Your <<$npc_nickname[''A29'']>> finishes what she is doing and comes over, tears in her eyes. Wrapping you in a big hug, she tells you how glad she is you decided to attend university and reminds you again to stay away from boys, before joining the rest of the family by the door.'
+		'Your <<$npc_nickname[''A29'']>> finishes what she''s doing and comes over, tears in her eyes. Wrapping you in a tight hug, she tells you how proud she is of you for enrolling in university and again reminds you to stay away from boys before joining the rest of the family by the door.'
 	elseif npc_rel['A29'] <= 30:
-		'Your <<$npc_nickname[''A29'']>> finishes what she is doing and comes over and gives you an awkward hug, saying she is sorry for fighting with you on your big day, before joining the rest of the family by the door.'
+		'Your <<$npc_nickname[''A29'']>> finishes what she''s doing and gives you an awkward hug, apologising for fighting with you on your big day before joining the rest of the family by the door.'
 	else
-		'Your <<$npc_nickname[''A29'']>> finishes what she is doing and comes over and gives you a hug, telling how happy she is that you enrolled, before joining the rest of the family by the door.'
+		'Your <<$npc_nickname[''A29'']>> finishes what she''s doing and comes over and gives you a hug, telling how happy she is that you enrolled before joining the rest of the family by the door.'
 	end
 	*nl
-	'They all wave and head out, leaving you alone in the room. You spend some time putting the rest of your stuff away or stashing under your bed for later, before deciding to explore.'
+	'They all wave at you before leaving. You spend some time putting the rest of your stuff away or stashing it under your bed before deciding to explore the grounds.'
 
 	act 'Head outside': gt 'intro_uni', 'welcome_intro'
 end
@@ -232,7 +232,7 @@ if $ARGS[0] = 'welcome_intro':
 	gs 'obj_din', 'old'
 	*clr & cla
 	'<center><img <<$set_imgh>> src="images/system/1_openings/6_uni/uni_start.jpg"></center>'
-	'Welcome to Girl Life. Guide <<$pcs_nickname>> through the many challenges of University life. Manage schoolwork, a job, and relationships with the people you meet on your journey.'
+	'Welcome to Girl Life. Guide <<$pcs_nickname>> through the many challenges of life at university. Manage coursework, a job and relationships with the people you meet on your journey.'
 
 	act 'Start the game': gt 'uni_grounds', 'main'
 end

+ 4 - 0
locations/journal.qsrc

@@ -448,6 +448,10 @@ if $ARGS[0] = 'school':
 		'You are only getting top marks in a few of your classes but only a few of your grades are bad and you are not failing any classes. You should probably have no trouble getting into university if you want, but improving the bad grades would not be a bad idea.'
 	elseif class['school_grades_above_90'] > 0 and class['school_grades_above_70'] > 10: 
 		'You are only getting top marks in a few of your classes but only a few of your grades are bad and you are failing some classes. If you want to get into university you should probably try to improve the failing and bad grades.'
+	elseif class['school_grades_above_90'] > 0 and class['school_grades_above_40'] = 13: 
+		'You''re only getting top marks in some of your classes and a lot of bad grades, but you''re not failing any classes. You need to improve your bad grades if you want to get into university.'
+	elseif class['school_grades_above_90'] > 0 and class['school_grades_above_40'] > 10: 
+		'You''re getting top marks in a few of your classes, but are failing some of the others. You should improve your grades if you want to get into university.'
 	elseif class['school_grades_above_90'] > 0 and class['school_grades_above_40'] > 6: 
 		'You are getting top marks in a few of your classes but failing a lot of classes. If you want to get into university you need to do something about your failing and bad grades.'
 	elseif class['school_grades_above_90'] > 0: 

+ 4 - 6
locations/journal_quests.qsrc

@@ -393,15 +393,13 @@ if $ARGS[0] = 'start':
 						'Marcus has agreed to be Katja''s first, so I should talk with Katja at her room to set it up.'
 					end
 				end
-				
-			if katjaQW['school_kiss'] > 1 and (katjaQW['ivan_pussy'] + katjaQW['ivan_anal']) = 0:
-					'Ivan seems interested in Katja and I. Maybe I can get them to have a threesome? Kissing Katja at school should get his attention, or maybe we will run into him at the beach.' +iif(katjaQW['slut'] < 60, ' Katja needs to lose some more inhibition before she will agree.', '')+ +iif(IvanShowerQW ! 11, ' I need to have sex with Ivan first (See his quest on how to do this).', '')
-				end
 
-				if katjaQW['birth_control_start_day'] = 0 and katjaQW['QWstage'] >= 5:
+				if katjaQW['birth_control_start_day'] = 0 and katjaQW['QWstage'] >= 6:
 					'I should get Katja on birth control, then I could take her on some wilder sex adventures once she''s ready.'
-				elseif katjaQW['QWstage'] < 6 and katjaQW['anal_ques'] < 3 and katjaQW['slut'] <= 100:
+				elseif katjaQW['QWstage'] < 6 or katjaQW['anal_quest'] < 3 or katjaQW['slut'] <= 100:
 					'I should continue to corrupt Katja. There might be more things I can push her to do.'
+				elseif katjaQW['QWstage'] = 6
+					'Katja wants to talk to me about something at her home. She needs to be somewhat horny to ask me'
 				elseif katjaQW['park_sex'] = 0:
 					'I should take Katja to the park to get her to to hook up with random guys.'
 				elseif katjaQW['park_sex'] = 1:

+ 1 - 1
locations/katja_lake.qsrc

@@ -894,7 +894,7 @@ if $ARGS[0] = 'ivan_interaction':
 		act 'Walk':gt 'katja_lake','walk'
 		act 'Redress and look for something else to do':gs 'clothing', 'wear_last_worn' & gs 'underwear', 'wear' & minut += 10 & gt 'katjaEv','kathan'
 
-		if IvanShowerQW = 11 and fame['pav_slut'] <250 and katjaQW['horny'] >60 and katjaQW['anal_quest'] = 2 and npc_sex['A14'] > 0:
+		if IvanShowerQW = 11 and fame['pav_slut'] <250 and katjaQW['horny'] >60 and katjaQW['anal_quest'] >= 2 and npc_sex['A14'] > 0:
 			act '"Hey Ivan! You know, we are REALLY bored!"':
 				*clr & cla
 				gs 'boyStat', 'A3'